tweet Page 136 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Lingerie Football League Hopes Michael Jackson's Daughter Will Help Develop "Future LFL Athletes"
Somehow, somebody at world headquarters of a football league with a fan base comprised, mostly, of dudes who like watching women in bra-and-sport-panties uniforms partake in jiggly rough-housing stroked their inspiration wand and chanted something to the tune of, "We can be an inspirational entity ...

If "God Damn It" Is A Curse, Chris Carpenter Just Cursed On National Television
Will no one think of the children's ears? (H/T Brian K.)...

Accuse Someone Of Diving In Greek Soccer And You May Get Pantsed Like This Guy Here Did
Olympiakos defender Francois "Modesto reacted angrily after he was lambasted for appearing to feign injury by AEK Athens centre-half Cala during a Greek Super League clash on Saturday. Cala looked totally bemused as he stood with his black shorts around his ankles, yanking them up as quickly as he...

Lenny Dykstra Faces Four Years In Prison After Grand Theft Auto Plea Deal, Is Free Until January
Today, Lenny Dykstra pleaded no contest to three counts of felony grand theft auto and one count of submitting false statements to a financial institution stemming for allegedly leasing sweet rides with bogus paperwork. In return for said pleading, 21 other charges were dropped and Nails was ROR'd ...

Your World Series Game One Open Thread
Are you excited? Because we are excited. ("We" in this case refers to the Editor Emeritus of this webspace, who writes in that style, and not too many current staffers, because this series is to be played between two mostly uninteresting teams from the middle of the country that don't wear the right...

Kickass Hot Wheels Track Goes Upstairs, Downstairs, Around The Freaking Block
It took a lot of time and effort to build this 2000-foot long Hot Wheels track—From The Marbles says that's equivalent to 24 miles in big people land—with only a three-minute video payoff. We say it was absolutely worth it. We found ourselves unaccountably rooting for the little plastic car, espec...

This Evening: Just In Time For The World Series, The Ron Washington Pumpkin
Your p.m. roundup for Oct. 19, the day we learned pregnant women don't want to give birth on Halloween. Photo of the (possibly fake?) Washington jack-o-lantern courtesy @lifeguardkyle, via @bigleaguestew. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Damn Nature, You Majestic: Kayaker Gets A Visit From A Blue Whale
A kayaker off of Los Angeles's Redondo Beach came prow to rostrum with nature's gentle giant, the blue whale. Kayaking is a sport, and my first grade teacher Mr. Moy gave me an unhealthy love of whales, so here it is....

"I'm About Winning": Coach K Wasn't Included In Duke's Auto-Tune Song, So We Made One For Him
Mike Krzyzewski did not partake in DJ Steve Porter's Auto-Tuned "Duke Worldwide" music video, so we went into the Deadspin recording studio (it's called GarageBand and it's probably on your Mac) and mixed one ourselves....

Homemade Infographic: Is The World Series Famous Enough For Dirk Nowitzki?
Maybe Major League Baseball is preventing Dirk Nozitzki from throwing out the first pitch for the Texas Rangers for some reason other than as a courtesy to NBA owners, an intersport extension of the basketball lockout. Maybe it really is that as they weighed "what makes sense for the team and a good...

Olympic Sprinting Is Sexist Toward Men, Says Research Paper I Don't Fully Understand But Sounds Plausible
We knew that false starts in sprinting are triggered by a sensor in the starting block. What we did not know is that a false start can still be triggered if a runner breaks after the starting gun—anywhere up to a tenth of a second after. This is because, the thinking goes, the human nervous system c...

Andy Dalton: This Whole NFL Thing "Is A Lot Easier Than I Expected"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Bengals QB wonders why the transition is so hard for others....

Buddy Ryan's "Polish Goal Line" Defense Was Against The Rules, And That Was The Point
This diagram is supposed to be from the Houston Oilers' playbook in 1993, the one season Buddy Ryan spent as the team's defensive coordinator. It depicts a special goal-line formation Ryan designed for the end of the half or the end of the game—situations in which there were "less than 15 seconds,"...

Duke Basketball Made More Insufferable With Auto-Tuned "Duke Worldwide" Music Video
Midnight Madness took place last weekend. Lots of people do insufferable things during Midnight Madness, and increasingly, they do those insufferable things on camera. This is no longer limited to a drunk sorority girl's iPhone filming from the upper deck, muffled by screams and excited shaking ha...

Bryant Gumbel Drops One Little Plantation Metaphor, And Everybody Loses Their Shit
You'll notice that Bryant Gumbel never once used the s-word in his criticism of David Stern last night. His extended analogy called the players "hired hands," which ought to put the lie to any suggestion that actual, literal slavery was being evoked. That hasn't stopped the usual backlash that comes...

MLB's Fun Police Bans Dirk Nowitzki From Throwing Out First Pitch At A World Series Game
From Marc Stein: "Sources told ESPNDallas.com that—with the NBA in the midst of a lockout that has spanned 111 days—at least some hesitation stems from the idea that MLB executives want to stand behind their basketball counterparts and have notified the Rangers that they can't bestow first-pitch hon...

Doc Gooden Missed The Mets' Victory Parade In 1986 Because He Was Doing Coke, And Other Depressing Tales
It's time for some uplifting news from the good folks at E:60! It's a rare occasion when "club in Long Island" is not the most soul-wrenching part of a story, but this is one of those times. ...

Soccer Player Apparently Stabbed In Eyeball After Soft Slap To Neck
The business of cataloging awful (and sometimes admirable) injury performances in soccer games is an important one, and we do not take it lightly. Also not apparently taken lightly: Incidental contact to Lille's Aurélien Chedjou's neck. The contact somehow automatically transported to the Cameroon...

Remembering The Best Punt Return That Never Officially Happened
Bears wide receiver/returner Devin Hester—as Drew explained Monday—is the human highlight reel that opponents have to kick to. He gave us a splendid return on Sunday night. But perhaps his best play of the season came on a play when he never touched the ball, on a play that never happened, as far ...

This Is Shaq Speaking Out Against Anti-Gay Bullies
First, Michael Irvin appeared on the cover of Out magazine this summer and acknowledged how he's come to accept his gay older brother. Now, here's Shaq teaming up with the folks from GLAAD to lend his own voice to the issue. Progress. [SLAM]...