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Cleveland’s Sunday Tailgate Scene Also Included A Couple Who Ditched Their 9-Year-Old Foster Child
Anna and Earnest Fugate are fans of the type of Cleveland Browns fans who apparently like to fight while "partying" in the muni-lot. You know, that place where ""society devolves to its lowest point each week."...

So, Michelle Beadle Apparently Sucked On Linda Cohn's Leg Today
Two girls, one Nike product-placement victory. Per @SarahSpain, "Thank god @ESPN_Michelle had that rattlesnake training. Her Texas upbringing saved @lindacohn 's life." Aw. (H/T Obsessed With Sports)...

Deadspin Classic: A Prayer For Steve Bartman
Alex Gibney's film Catching Hell—about Cubdom's favorite scapegoat, Steve Bartman—aired tonight on ESPN. Last year, we adapted the following excerpt about Bartman from Will Leitch's book Are We Winning? Fathers and Sons and the New Golden Age of Baseball. Originally published May 4, 2010....

Today In Exploding Toilets News
"Authorities say a woman was taken to a local hospital after a toilet she was using exploded at the General Services Administration Building in Washington, D.C. Fire and EMS spokesman Pete Piringer says the woman has serious, but non-life-threatening injuries. Piringer says when D.C. Fire and EMS ...

Watch A Norwegian Soccer Player Score A Goal From Midfield With His Head
If this ends up being the only time that you watch highlights from an Odd Grenland/Tromso match of Norwegian soccer, making it Jone Samuelsen's 57+ meter head-ball goal is a good call. In fact, the Odd Grenland midfielder's feat might be nominated for some Guinness Book of World Records inclusion....

The C-Roll's Happy Ending: A Back-Row Handjob At A Marlins Game (NSFW)
The finale of the C-Roll brings us, presumably, to what we now call Sun Life Stadium, where young love once possibly blossomed in the back row of some forgotten section—the details are now lost to history. There's no game audio attached to this one, so there's no way to determine when it was shot,...

I-Team: Which Former Phillies Prospect Was Filmed Reverse-Cowgirling At The Coliseum?
You've seen the footage by now, either here, or elsewhere: a happy couple boinking away during an extended session of bleacher-seat sex while the cameraman films away. But according one tipster, the man in this classic video was a coveted MLB prospect: ...

This Evening: Let's Watch 10 Stadium Demolitions In A Row
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 27, the day we learned red wine wasn't the blood-pressure cure we thought it was. H/T to Robert for the video. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Rory McIlroy And Caroline Wozniacki Give Themselves An Insufferable Couple Nickname: Wozzilroy
If you didn't know, now you now: tennis star Caroline Wozniacki and golf star Rory McIlroy have been dating for a few months. McIlroy recently made his love official by engraving a golf club with the name "Wozzilroy," which is what they have decided we will call them. We, obviously, have decided to ...

Watching The Bengals Can Be A Fate Worse Than Death, Says Dying Bengals Fan
"Accepting that the end was near, the funny grandfather and great-grandfather said earlier in the day there was an upside to death: at least he wouldn't have to watch another Bengals loss." [Sports Grid, via Cincinnati Enquirer]...

The Curse Of Dopey "Curse Of The Bambino" References, And Other Dumb Things About The Red Sox's Stretch Run
Harvey Araton of the New York Times, reporting from Baltimore, sets the new/old standard for witless hackery today:...

Matt Kemp Poses Shirtless, Sometimes Spends Too Much On Clothes, Wants A Woman He Can Shop With
Matt Kemp, the Dodgers outfielder who counts Rihanna among his ex-girlfriends, is having an MVP-caliber season. He recently gave an interview to Flaunt magazine in which he revealed a bit about his tastes in both clothes and women....

Screw You, And Screw Your Man Card
I don't know who invented the phrase "Turn in your man card," but whoever it is should be taken out in the street and have his balls stomped on by a fucking marching band. Every Sunday, I'm now subjected to some goddamn Miller Lite ad where the guys in it are like, "ZOMG! You're drinking a generic l...

Report: Arvydas Sabonis Suffered A Heart Attack Today
There is a report that Arvydas Sabonis, the 46-year-old former Portland Trail Blazer from Lithuania, suffered a heart attack while playing basketball in Kaunas today. One translated report says that his condition is "very serious." [via @LithuaniaBasket]...

Black Hockey Player Pays The Bigotry Forward, Calls Sean Avery A "Fucking Faggot"
Just over a week ago, Wayne Simmonds—one of the few black players in the NHL—had a banana thrown at him during an exhibition game in London. Yesterday in Philadelphia, after a slight altercation during a preseason game against the Rangers at Wells Fargo Center, Simmonds allegedly called Sean Avery...

The NFL's Evolution, As Measured By Dan Dierdorfisms
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

We Remind You Once Again That Dan Shaughnessy Is Putrid
Your letters:...

Cleveland's Sunday Tailgate Scene Includes Stand-Up Trailer Blowjob And Boxer-Brief Beatdowns
This video tableau of good ol' midwestern football revelry comes from the infamous Municipal Parking Lot tailgate scene (The Muni Lot), where, as one reader says, "society devolves to its lowest point each week." The top video, courtesy of the eagle-eyed videographers /amateur pornographers at "Ma...

FC Barcelona Asks Nike For Jerseys That Won't Weigh Them Down With Their Own Sweat
Technically speaking, the Nike Dri-Fit fabric is designed to "to wick sweat away and help keep you dry and comfortable."...

Watch Jamie Dukes Be Totally Inappropriate With His Female NFL Network Co-Host (Video)
He bent over and asked her to take a snap from him. And it was incredibly awkward. Dukes recovered nicely and continued to make his point, but a short time later he ... asked again. And it was even more awkward. Idiot. [Midwest Sports Fans]...