ugh Page 56 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Brian Urlacher Agrees With America, Says Colin Kaepernick "Fucking Played Well"
The quarterback controversy is underway in San Francisco after quarterback Colin Kaepernick's superb performance last night against Chicago, one that brought praise even from Bears All-Pro linebacker Brian Urlacher....
Orioles Prospect Needs To Find A New Superstition Now That Hostess Has Closed Up Shop
Orioles pitching prospect Kevin Gausman was drafted by the Baltimore Orioles, signed to a $4.23 million signing bonus and pitched 15 innings of professional baseball this year. Because baseball players are weirdos, Gausman must eat four powdered mini-doughnuts prior to each inning he pitches. Obviou...
Why Don't The 49ers Use Their Rookies?
There's something weird going on with the San Francisco 49ers: They don't use their rookies at all....
Alex Smith Was Nearly Perfect Last Night, So Jim Harbaugh Said Some More Crazy Shit
You'll excuse us for not watching Niners-Cardinals last night. Our city was flooding. But we checked the various recaps today and saw this:...
Hugh Douglas Is Transitioning Nicely Into His Life As A Sports Pundit
You probably remember Hugh Douglas from his playing days with the Philadelphia Eagles and that one time he tried to beat up Terrell Owens. Now retired, Douglas is working as one of ESPN's many NFL analysts, and last night he went through one of the most sacred rites of passage in sports media: He a...
Canada's Best Hockey Broadcaster Is Building A Lake Cabin With His Bare Hands, Just Waiting For A Call
There's no hockey, as you may have heard. This means NBC's Doc Emrick, one of our favorites, is calling figure skating for the peacock network. But what about Jim Hughson of the CBC? Hughson—whose best Roberto-Luongo-specific calls you can hear above—is another one of our favorites. Unlike Emrick,...
A Big Huge Ball Of Crazy. <em>Cloud Atlas</em>, Reviewed.
1. I've never read the book Cloud Atlas, but I bet it's good. Judging from the film, the book must be insanely ambitious—narratively and stylistically—clearly vying to be no less than some sort of grand binding theory of everything, throughout history, forever. That sort of ambition can work on the ...
"Shaken Up On The Play": The Semantic Loopholes That Allow The NFL To Survive Its Concussion Crisis
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Jim Harbaugh Is A Crazy Person
On Thursday, Giants offensive coordinator Kevin Gilbride expressed some moderate displeasure with the technique of Niners defensive end Justin Smith. Smith is one big part of the Niners' stellar front seven—he clears space for the run-stopping linebackers, Patrick Willis and NaVorro Bowman, and gets...
Are You A <em>Boston Globe</em> Columnist Starved For Attention? Try Some Boilerplate Blogger Trolling
If you're writing a column with an inarguable premise—e.g. fans shouldn't cheer after injuries—you might find yourself wanting for a little more reaction. How about an unprovoked shot at bloggers?...
Watch Your Favorite Actors Humiliate Themselves In <em>The Paperboy</em>, The Worst Movie Of The Year
In 2003, Matthew McConaughey starred in a film called Tiptoes that went straight to video. It might seem odd that this film would go straight to video, considering its cast included McConaughey, Kate Beckinsale, Gary Oldman, Patricia Arquette, and Peter Dinklage. But then you see what the film was a...
A's Pitcher Pat Neshek's Newborn Son Has Died
On Monday, the Oakland Athletics clinched a playoff spot, and just a few hours later pitcher Pat Neshek's wife went into labor. Neshek flew to Florida and was with his wife when she gave birth to a baby boy....
Canadian Junior-Hockey Players Break Into Teammate's House With Fake Guns And Ski Masks, Get Busted By The Mounties
Players from the Peterborough Petes, an Ontario Hockey League team, thought it would be a good idea to sneak into a teammate's house at night while wearing masks and holding fake guns. You know, just as a harmless prank. They didn't consider what their practical joke might look like to the rest of t...
Manchester United Fans Chanted "Murderers" At Liverpool In The First Match At Anfield After The Hillsborough Report
Yesterday's match, a controversial 2-1 loss to United, was Liverpool's first time back at Anfield since the release of the Hillsborough Independent Panel's findings. The report absolved Reds supporters of any blame in the 1989 stampede that killed 96 fans, and the day was sure to be an emotional o...
Old Dominion QB Taylor Heinicke Threw For 730 Yards Today, A D-I Record
Today in Norfolk, Va., a freakin' sophomore quarterback named Taylor Heinicke threw a football 79 times to lead Old Dominion past New Hampshire 64-61. His receivers caught 55 of those passes. Between Heinicke and those receivers, they moved the ball 730 yards via the air. That ridiculous number is a...
Why Jump A Kneeldown? Because It Worked Two Years Ago
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Tom Coughlin Yells At Greg Schiano Because Tom Coughlin Yells At People
At the end of the game, Eli Manning took a knee to run out the clock and end the game. The Tampa Bay defense pushed hard and knocked Eli over. Manning thought it was a cheap shot....