um Page 304 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Marlins Asked Fans To Share Their Favorite Memories From This Season. It Went About How You'd Expect.
Yesterday, the Miami Marlins posted the lovely photo you see above on the team's Facebook page....

An Astounding Story Of Fraud, Blackmail, And The Fake Twitter Rumormonger Who Took On Liverpool
You don't need a ton of context to appreciate how batshit amazing this story is. Out of nowhere, a Twitter account emerges, claiming to have inside information. He floats some transfer rumors, scores a few hits, and all of a sudden becomes one of the more trusted sources covering Liverpool FC. So tr...

"Now I Know What Chicks Feel Like," Tim Lincecum Responds After Being "Hit In The Fucking Face With A Fucking Cork"
It's standard to see baseball players celebrating a playoff win adorning scuba masks or swim goggles while spraying various beverages around the clubhouse. You know, because that stuff can mess your eyes up. Even worse, an errant champagne cork might find its way toward your face, as appears happ...

Troy Aikman Calls Dallas Fans A Bunch Of Bandwagoners
When Brandon Marshall called Chicago's win over the Cowboys two weeks ago—at Cowboys Stadium—a "home game", he wasn't kidding. The Bears jumped out to an early lead, never looked back, and received an increasing percentage of the cheers as the game went on....

Here's A Belgian Soccer Player Driving His Porsche Into A Store
A rough Saturday night for Belgian midfielder Jonathan Legear. He had just found out he was not selected by his Russian club, and spent the night...somewhere. Whatever he did, he found himself on the road at 5:30 a.m., and this happened....

That Sure Looks Like A Pair Of Vicious Hickeys On Rob Gronkowski's Neck
The Patriots tight end didn't have the best game yesterday, reeling in just four catches for 35 yards. But the picture above suggests that Gronk had himself a time earlier in the weekend....
![The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
The Air-Humping Chicago Bears Assistant Coach Is Really Gross [UPDATE: The Air-Humper Has Been Identified]
Gross. That is really gross, dude. You're way too old to be doing stuff like this. I'm sure the "Hey loogit me y'all, I'm humpin' air. Hee haw!" routine used to be really funny back in your college days, but you're a grown-up now; a grown-up who should know that air-humping—especially while using ...

The Jets Are In Line For An Attendance Debacle Tonight
It's been reported that as of Friday, the Jets had 12,000 tickets remaining unsold for tonight's game against the Texans. It's understandable. MetLife Stadium is a remarkably joyless place to watch your team lose 59-6. But there have been no whispers of a blackout, so we can assume Woody Johnson has...

The Oakland Athletics Love Affair With Late 80's And Early 90's Screwball Comedies: Part 2
By now, we are all familiar with the Athletics' necrophilia. It's been a fun few months for the team and the city, despite dropping the opening game of the series to Detroit last night. In many ways they embody the spirit of Bernie. No one expects much from a corpse and no one really expected much f...

How To Freak Out A Ref, By Illini Quarterback Nathan Scheelhaase
Either that referee really didn't want to seem like he had a conflict of interest by high-fiving a player from one of the teams, or he's a germaphobe. Considering it's probably the former, we now know every ref's kryptonite—run after them with your hand up and they'll walk over their own mother to...

Beer Of The Week: Blue Buck, In Time For Canadian Thanksgiving
Monday marks a holiday that in Canada is known as Thanksgiving. Any American will recognize the basic outlines of the day: Get together with friends and family and eat until you can compare stretchmarks and then succumb to naps. That doesn't mean it's the same holiday. Care to (U) guess (S) which (A...

The NBA Releases A Video Demonstrating The Seven Illegal Flops That Will Get Players Fined This Season
The NBA released a video yesterday of all the flops that they officially consider flops now that the NBA is officially considering flops. It has a weird narrator who uses unnecessarily colorful language, which is great. We get a "grossly embellished fall to the floor" from Reggie Evans, an "over-e...

Chipper Jones Predicted The Way The One-Game Playoff Would End Two Weeks Ago
As many have noted, two weeks ago, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution asked Chipper Jones what he thought of the one-game playoff. He said he thought the new double-wildcard, play-in game system was "stupid," because it potentially puts the second best team in a given league in the position of playing...

<em>USA Today</em> Just Couldn't Wait To Troll Braves Fans And Everyone Else About That Call Last Night
Like the call that handed the Seahawks the win over the Packers two Mondays ago, the ruling in the Braves-Cardinals death match was complex enough to trip up the layman. The call on Golden Tate's "touchdown" could, if you squinted, have been justified based on a slippery understanding of the concept...

Braves Fans Attack Umpires With Garbage After Worst Infield Fly Call Ever
Havoc broke loose in the eighth inning of tonight's Cardinals-Braves wild card game after a late—and terrible—infield fly call on a popup to left field that St. Louis couldn't corral. ...

The Same Firm That Designed The Nets' Rusty Spaceship In Brooklyn Will Make A Soccer Stadium In Queens
The old maxim says that you can't determine the quality and endurance of a sports arena until Jay-Z has played at least six of eight consecutive concerts there. With that requirement satisfied and the Barclays Arena yet to crumble into a pile of orange-brown dust, MLS felt comfortable asking Barclay...

The First Season Of Marlins Park Was A Tremendous Failure
The Miami Marlins opened their new ballpark in April to much pomp and fanfare and cringe-inducing spectacle, and there were great hopes that the empty orange seats that had come to represent the very idea of baseball in South Florida would fast become but a memory. Funny thing about that! The team, ...

A Wee Bird Terrorized One Yankee Stadium Grounds Crew Worker
You just never know when a li'l injured/scared bird will come onto a baseball field and starting flopping and flailing before (kinda) flying off, but this one made sure it first made an unfortunate example out of a Yankee Stadium worker. Oh, and don't miss the part where Michael Kay thinks, if onl...

A Red Sox Fan Pulled A Jeffrey Maier And Gave The Yankees A Home Run
We thought last week's minor kerfluffle, on Bobby Valentine's game of employment chicken, would be the last Red Sox update we'd have to do this season. No sense piling on. But the Red Sox can't seem to stop doing terrible things....

The Jerry Dome Is Infested With Gigantic Roaches
Sure, Cowboys Stadium may be a billion-dollar shrine to fossil fuels football, but even with the new Victoria's Secret store it seems they have a bit of a problem with pest control. EWWW. ...