ump Page 64 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Donald Trump Praises Missouri's Football Teams In Bizarre Speech
In the past twelve months, the state of Missouri has watched its NFL team depart for Los Angeles while its lone Division I-FBS team nearly went on strike due to racism on campus; they went 5-7 on the season. The two FCS programs? Missouri State’s football team went 1-10, while SEMO went 4-7. Donald ...
Sports Figure Endorses Donald Trump
Donald Trump, a screeching piece of mac ‘n cheese pizza, recently picked up an endorsement from former Yankee Paul O’Neill. He now has another former baseball player on his side, in the form of former Red Sox and Yankees star Johnny Damon....
Donald Trump Shouts Out Paul O'Neill At Press Conference, Gets His Endorsement
Former Yankees outfielder Paul O’Neill showed up at the press conference turned Home Shopping Network program that Donald Trump, a short-fingered megalomaniac, held in Florida tonight, and even got a shoutout during Trump’s speech. John Kasich will be torn up about not getting his fellow Ohioan’s su...
Keith Olbermann Bodyslams Donald Trump Through The Core Of The Earth
Ever since Keith Olbermann left the ESPN airwaves eight months ago, there has been a conspicuous lack of uppercutting people into volcanoes and dropkicking them through glass doors in our lives. But there was no way the man who made his post-SportsCenter name exchanging haymakers with the Bush admin...
Bad Old Man Would Vote For Other Bad Old Man
Mike Ditka, a screaming bowl of sausage gravy, went on the radio yesterday and said that if the presidential election were to happen tomorrow, he would probably vote for Donald Trump, a racist haggis....
Republican Voters Vote For A Very Republican Republican
Back in August, I wrote a post accusing the political media of covering Donald Trump’s presidential candidacy more, and more seriously, than it deserved. “Stop Pretending Donald Trump Is Running For President,” I titled the post. D’oh....
NASCAR CEO Brian France, Hall Of Famer Bill Elliott Endorse Trump For President
Donald Trump—who is what happens when a fart farts and also quite possibly the GOP nominee for president—got a collection of endorsements today from NASCAR: Chairman and CEO Brian France, Hall of Fame driver Bill Elliott, and current drivers Chase Elliott, Ryan Newman, and David Lee Regan....
Watch John Oliver MURDERSLAY Donald Trump
Making fun of Donald Trump is remarkably easy, but that doesn’t mean it ain’t satisfying. So why not sit back and watch self-described parrot banker John Oliver comprehensively rip Trump a new moneyhole for 20 solid minutes? You won’t be disappointed. You can’t be disappointed. Sometimes the easiest...
Umpire Awards Point To Caroline Wozniacki's Opponent For No Reason
Dominika Cibulkova knocked Caroline Wozniacki out of the St. Petersburg WTA tournament yesterday in a match that featured one of the most baffling decisions made by a chair umpire we’ve seen in a long time....
Gregg Popovich Is Dismayed With The New Hampshire Primary Results
Gregg Popovich gave his usual surly in-game interview, but then David Aldridge asked a question that intrigued him: did Pop want to know the results of tonight’s primaries in New Hampshire? Yes, yes he did....
Line Umpire Suffers Blast To The Nuts
Here’s an Australian Open line umpire taking a blow “down under” during today’s Federer-Berdych match. Ow ow ow ow ow....
You Don’t Scare Me, Snow
By now, you are probably aware that the East Coast is about to get murdered with 50 tons of acid methane snow over the weekend. You know this because people who live on the East Coast believe that their weather is EVERYONE’S weather....
Bill Belichick On How He Hurt His Eye: "Great"
Patriots head coach Bill Belichick was feeling extra grumpy at this morning’s press conference. He opened with a short statement on the Chandler Jones situation, and then got snippy with reporters who kept asking him about it:...
How Alabama Pulled Off The Perfect Onside Kick
Alabama, it will not surprise you if you know Nick Saban’s near-sociopathic attention to detail, had been practicing precisely that onside kick every week since August. But it wasn’t until long film study had identified a potential weakness in Clemson’s kick return coverage, and firsthand observatio...
Trump Endorses Brain Damage In Speech That Claims Football, Like America, Has Gone "Soft"
Donald Trump ranted at length today during a Reno campaign stop about how “soft” he believes the game of football has become, pointing to last night’s Steelers-Bengals game as an illustration of how player-safety rules are ruining America....