ump Page 81 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Iman "Justin Bieber" Shumpert Is Here To Give You Nightmares
Knicks draft pick Iman Shumpert is playing in the Vegas league, and getting salty he's missing New York Fashion Week. He's also filming locker room videos of unspeakable horror. Shumpert and Bieber now have another thing in common, besides both being booed by Knicks fans.[Posting and Toasting]...

This Evening: That Sign Behind Home Plate Sums It Up
Your p.m. roundup for Aug. 25, the day we discovered beef jerky potato chips. H/T to Dan for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

You Made Stubby Clapp Angry
There are very few memorable players with just 25 career major league at-bats. And yet, we vividly remember Stubby Clapp from his brief 2001 stint with the Cardinals. What could it have been?...

Stephen A. Smith, The Comeback Kid?
Amateur LeRoy Neiman impersonator Bob Raissman poses a disarming theory in his New York Daily News column today: Stephen A. Smith might actually be doing a good job on an ESPN outlet....

Kim Kardashian Files $20M Lawsuit Over Ad Featuring Ex-Boyfriend Reggie Bush's Kardashian-Lookalike Current Girlfriend
Yesterday, a woman who built a "reality star" career from a sex tape that turned her ass into a household name filed suit against a clothing store for featuring a woman who built an "Old Navy commercial star" career from looking like the woman with the sex-tape ass. Fun fact: reality star is New O...

Dry-Hump On, Good Mötley Crüe-Lovin' People Of Nashville
Tipster James sent us this photo all the way back on July 5, when Nashville was fresh from being rocked by the Crüe two days prior. And for reasons unknown, we haven't posted it until now. For that we apologize profusely....

Dwight Howard Tweeted About His Dump To Some Young Lady
I assume this is the kind of true romance—for which NBA players, Dwight especially—are known, the Harlequin stuff that necessitated Basketball Wives. Having never watched the program, I assume it's all about the refined courtship techniques of professional basketball players. Such as this....

One Green-Jersey'd Schmo Gesticulates Wildly On Behalf Of All Knicks Fans
We know, guy. We know....

Woman Who Used To Bang Kim Kardashian's Fiancé Shopping Book About Banging Kim Kardashian's Fiancé
Here's a somewhat amusing pitch forwarded to us by two people in the past 12 hours from an aspiring author named Lisa Monks who's writing a tell-all about some of her NBA bedroom conquests. From her [sic]'d email — sent to a couple gossip mags — it promises these not-so-explosive bombshells:...

Baseball Gets It Right On Officiating Where The NBA Falls Short
After the shouldabeen perfect game, Armando Galarraga and Jim Joyce wrote a book together. Because they've got a business relationship, says MLB, Joyce would not be allowed to work any games involving Galarraga's teams....

The Kim Kardashian Effect: Advanced Stats Show Why Kris Humphries Put A Ring On It
Nets forward Kris Humphries put up great numbers in the seventh season of his NBA career, his first as Kim Kardashian's beau. The couple announced their engagement (with a disturbing description of an "intimate family celebration" involving horses), and while there are no shortage of possible motive...

Year Of The Pitcher Dies Premature Death, Aged 29 Days
What some were already calling the second straight "Year of the Pitcher" in baseball came to an abrupt end yesterday, as bats exploded into craziness around MLB....

Real Men Support The Cleveland Indians By Kissing One Another On Live Television
Your morning roundup for April 7, the day that attempted courtroom eye-gouging became a no-no....

Kris "The Incredible Hump" Humphries Would Like You To Vote For Him For Some Things
It's been one of those seasons, right down to the Nets PR guy accidentally emailing his media contact list to complain that he couldn't find anyone to buy his tickets off of him. (Yes, that's a thing that actually happened.)...

A Toronto Raptor Gets Either Ankle-Broken Or Tripped In London
Some say Deron Williams of the New Jersey Nets broke Sonny Weems's ankles in last night's Nets/Raptors game in London. That means some look past the fact that Weems more likely than not got tripped by Kris Humphries while defending Williams....

You Will Believe A Man (On Skis) Can Fly
Did you know "ski flying" is a thing? Well, this guy did it farther than anyone else, sailing more than 800 feet on nothing more than a giant new slope, state-of-the-art equipment...and a dream....

Titans WR Kenny Britt Has A Problem With Bail Bondsmen
To hear Bails Bails Bails and Boss Bail Bonds tell it, Tennessee Titans WR Kenny Britt swore he'd cover the $12,500 necessary to cut his Jersey City boy Albert Robinson free of The Man's clutches, but when time come to pay, Britt didn't step up....

Yep, Rashard Mendenhall Really Used Ben Roethlisberger Like An Inflatable Sex Toy
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

OK, Let's Talk About That Double Dutch Sports Bra Ad
You know the one. Even if you didn't notice what's being advertised, you noticed the commercial....

Here's A Video Of Donald Trump Almost Losing His Hairpiece In A Gillette Stadium Skybox
Just when you think it's going to fly off and whip into Robert Kraft's face... it flips back down again. Incredibly, his expression hardly changes. Here's hoping for a stronger gust of wind in Foxboro....