unc Page 35 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Kobayashi Chugs A Gallon Of Milk In 20 Seconds
Takeru Kobayashi is still exiled from the Nathan's hot dog eating contest, but that just means he has more time to do things like scarf some pizzas with some bros, or, in this case, chug an entire gallon of milk for the sake of entertaining the kind folks at Uncle Bob's Self Storage....

Not Everyone Is Turning Their Backs On Aaron Hernandez
Apparently this would have been at the Pouncey brothers' birthday party last night, which NFL beat writer Omar Kelly attended unironically/journalistically:...

Transactions, July 12
Jack Dickey is leaving us for Sports Illustrated, the grown-up version of Sports Illustrated Kids. He'll also be writing weird things for Time.com. We'll miss Jack for reasons too numerous to address here, and if we were the sort of site to get gloppy and sentimental about departures, we'd link to s...

Hassoun Camara Scores Impossible Bicycle Goal From Ground
I have no clue how this worked for Hassoun Camara, beyond the goalkeeper error cited by the commentator. But it did!...

Bet a Million
I once had dinner with Vic Ziegel and asked him to name the most literate sports writer. And he laughed at me, laughed at the idea that someone working on deadline would stop to consider what they were doing literate. ...

The Spurs' Rock Finally Cracks: Tim Duncan Needs Your Love Now
The outside world never seems to affect Tim Duncan as much it does you and me. He doesn't furrow his brow or snarl. His whole bearing suggests a sort of aloof, unrelatable mastery—of his talents, of his emotions, of his image, of everything around him. Which is why it was so hard to watch him last ...

The Best Thing About These Finals: There Are No Goats
When Game 1 of the NBA finals ended, we expressed a hope that this series would last forever. What we've ended up with is the next best thing: seven games, with last night's overtime, instant-classic, scare-the-cat-and-wake-up-the-neighbors thriller setting up a finale on Thursday that will be the c...

Danny Green Nearly Runs Over What We Guess Is Tim Duncan's Son
What is going on here? Why is this child dressed as a terrorist? Why is Danny Green nearly assaulting him? Why is Danny Green the all-time record holder for three-pointers in the NBA Finals?...

Miami's Big Three Bests San Antonio's Big One-And-Three-Quarters
For much of the playoffs the question had been whether LeBron James could just get some help from his teammates. By the time Game 3 of the Finals rolled around, it began to look like LeBron was fading. But in Game 4, LeBron, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh finally put a game together in the playoffs to l...

The KKK And Noisy Crickets Stopped Patrick Ewing From Going To UNC
NBA legend Patrick Ewing went on the Dan Patrick Show this morning to talk about his new position as an assistant coach for the Charlotte Bobcats, and the conversation eventually turned to reminiscing about Ewing's college days. In particular, Patrick wanted to know exactly why Ewing chose to atten...

The Four Most Punchable Faces In Human History
Before we get to the Funbag, some notes of vital interest. If you're in New York tomorrow night, I'll be doing Scott Rogowsky's Running Late show over in Brooklyn. It's like a live talk show-type thing. You can buy tickets here. You get a free beer (not kidding) if you mention Deadspin at the door, ...

No One Notices The Spurs Because No One Notices San Antonio
Here's a working barstool-grade theory as to why, during its dynastic run to four (perhaps soon five) titles since 1999, America still embraces the San Antonio Spurs with a yawn and a why are you still here? squint. This phenomenon has flustered if not baffled sports cognoscenti for years. But they ...

You Can Go Home Again
Last November, Bryan Curtis wrote this piece on Marv Albert for Grantland:...

Taste Test: Uncrustables. What Does The Crustless PB&J Say About Us?
One of parenthood's myriad challenges, as any parent will attest, is finding the time in one's overscheduled, playdate- and tedious-errand-choked day to make weirdo peanut-butter-and-jelly-stuffed pierogi to foist upon our frightened and sobbing children. Thankfully, somebody at The J.M. Smucker Co...

You're Doing It Wrong, Jarrod
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....

Tim Duncan Is In The Middle Of A Remarkably Messy Divorce
As the ageless and unflappable Tim Duncan turns in another incredible playoff run, reports and court documents indicate the Spurs star has played this postseason while dealing with an ugly divorce from his wife of 12 years—and spent the regular season concerned about allegations of infidelity on her...

Same Faces, Same Result: The Spurs Are Back In The Finals
The Spurs get the "boring" label because basketball is supposed to be hard. As San Antonio heads to its fifth finals since 1999, its fourth with its multinational power trio intact, you wonder if they've made some cosmic bargain, or discovered a real-life cheat code, because the alternative—that the...

This Video Is Accurately Titled "Tim Duncan Realizing He Has Arms"
The title of this video turns some otherwise mundane sideline footage of Tim Duncan into something great. Whoaaaa. What are these things, man?...

