American Soccer Is Fine
Zack Steffen, an American soccer player who currently plies his trade on U.S. soil, is set to join the English Premier…
Tortured Hiring Process For USMNT Coaching Job Finally Ends The Way Everyone Knew It Would
U.S. Soccer finally made it official: Gregg Berhalter, who has spent the past five years coaching the Columbus Crew,…
The Next USMNT Coach Will Be Gregg Berhalter, Apparently
It is looking increasingly likely that Gregg Berhalter, former national team player and current Columbus Crew coach,…
Sydney Leroux Dwyer Reveals She Recently Suffered A Miscarriage
USWNT forward Sydney Leroux Dwyer said Monday that she was away from the NWSL’s Orlando Pride for most of August…
Happy One-Year Anniversary To This Bullshit
Has it already been a year? It seems like just yesterday I was watching wonderteen Christian Pulisic, now a wonderman,…
The USWNT Looks As Good As Ever And Is Rolling Toward The World Cup
CARY, N.C. — How are we not talking about this team all the time? Sustained dominance is easy to take for granted,…
Matt Miazga Adds Insult To Injury By Mocking Diego Lainez's Height In USMNT Victory
The USMNT beat Mexico in an international friendly Tuesday night, 1–0, on a second-half goal from teenager Tyler Adams.…
European Soccer Is Loaded With American Kids Ready To Tear Shit Up
American wonderteen Christian Pulisic will begin his march to the 2019 Ballon d’Or this weekend when Borussia Dortmund…
It's Time To Get Excited About The USWNT
On the one hand, this was just a friendly that the Stars and Stripes were supposed to win. But on the other hand, it’s…
Megan Rapinoe Is Still Pulling All The Right Strings
A 90th-minute Megan Rapinoe corner kick led to a dramatic Lindsey Horan goal for the USWNT on Sunday night, forcing a…
Liverpool's B-Team Came To America To Get Smacked Around By Christian Pulisic
Wonderteen Christian Pulisic willed Borussia Dortmund to a 3-1 victory over Liverpool in the International Champions…
U.S. Soccer Tries To Fix Its Problems By Building A Bigger Bureaucracy
U.S. Soccer’s steady march through sclerotic mediocrity continued apace today when American soccer’s governing body anno…
Here Are The New Kits The USMNT Won't Wear At The World Cup This Year
U.S. Soccer unveiled the new uniforms for the men’s and women’s national teams in what amounted to a Friday afternoon…
Screeching Moron Formerly In Charge Of U.S. Soccer Scouting Offers Braindead Anti-Messi Take
You probably aren’t familiar with Thomas Rongen, and we really wish we didn’t feel compelled to inform you of his…
U.S. Soccer Blew It
After many months of ardent campaigning and intense pressure from those inside and especially outside the American…
U.S. Soccer Federation Elects Vice President Carlos Cordeiro As New President
The United States Soccer Federation voted Saturday to name vice president Carlos Cordeiro its new president. Cordeiro…
Longest Running Women's Pro Soccer Team Folds Weeks Before Preseason Starts
The longest running professional women’s soccer team in the country has reportedly folded after a deal for potential…
U.S. Soccer Only Has Itself To Blame After Losing Jonathan González To Mexico
The United States’ defensive midfielder of the future will not be Jonathan González. A few days after reports surfaced…
Mexico Is Trying To Flip A Talented Dual National Away From The USMNT
Jonathan González is not only one of the best players in the U.S. Soccer youth system, he’s already one of the most…
USMNT Starlet Josh Sargent Inadvertently Offers Scathing Indictment Of MLS
Josh Sargent is one of the hottest American soccer prospects in the U.S. Soccer system. In three weeks, the 17-year-old…