w Page 4982 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Joe Borowski Fury Makes Its 2008 Debut
We thought it would happen during last year's playoffs, but in the wake of a high-profile loss to the Red Sox last night, Indians fans have finally had enough: They're ready to take Joe Borowski out to the woodshed and, you know, do whatever you do to people behind the woodshed....

The Glue-Handed Patroller Of The Middle Exterior
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Red Smiths, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's...

Will Clark Is A Cackling Douche
Being a sports reporter is, at times, an absolutely horrible job. Sure you get to watch games, travel, and interact with athletes, but there is a horrendous downside. (Which is pretty much everything else.) And this is never more disturbingly clear than when a reporter has their first (or 50th ) awf...

Alex Smith's Popularity Soaring
Sigh. Oh, The Dirty.com. It's amazing that this crew is getting all of these photos (well, three) of 49ers quarterback Alex Smith sent to them. What did Alex Smith ever do to anybody? Besides, you know, kind of suck?...

The Pope Should Wipe His Feet Before Entering Yankee Stadium
The Pope turns 81 years old today — 10 years older than John McCain, and just three years older than Julio Franco — and he's celebrating it in Washington, D.C. with President Bush. (What better way?) He will be celebrating mass at the new Nationals Stadium, which means we're going to assume Elijah D...

About Last Night
What you missed while trying to remember the combination to your pants ... • College basketball: Michael Beasley, whose Kansas State team lost six of its last nine games and failed to make it past the second round of the NCAA Tournament, says it's time to "take my game to the next level," enters NBA...

Meet All The Herschel Walkers Tonight
Tonight, ABC's Nightline has an interview with former running back Herschel Walker about his battle with multiple-personality disorder. We find out that Herschel went so some very spooky places while in the throes of his disease, like suicidal thoughts and unpredictable violent urges. Walker's ex-wi...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your new friend, Mr. Happy Toilet ... • Arena Football League: Chicago at Kansas City (8:30 p.m., ET). Here's hoping for plenty of air-time for the Brigade Girls. [ESPN2] • MLB: Boston at Cleveland (7 p.m., ET). Hopefully it will be above 12 degrees. [ESPN] • NHL: Western Conferen...

The Cowboys Have A Preferred Long Distance Provider
They're still constructing the Dallas Cowboys' new stadium, and if you're one of those people who thought the Cowboys were too iconic a franchise to fall prey to stadium naming right, well, stop being so foolish....

Wade Boggs And His Mullet Appear On ESPN
For those of you who saw Wade Boggs on "Baseball Tonight" this weekend — the one ESPN show we never, ever miss — you are probably wondering the same thing The Sports Hernia was wondering: When's "Road House 3" coming out?...

Scott Spiezio Continues To Drown In Boozy River Of Sadness
Former major leaguer Scott Spiezio's tumultuous battle with alcoholism has been marred by some ugly incidents. But even though the 35-year-old Spiezio had some extremely heavy baggage, the Atlanta Braves took a flyer on the guy, hoping he could get his life together and earn a spot on the Braves ros...

Celine Dion Will Heal Olympic Rifts With Powerful Vocals
Celine Dion is about ready to choke a bitch if this Olympic boycott talk persists. Dion called on all people to "keep the dream possible for our young kids." She came to Beijing to express support for the Games after her concert in Shanghai on Friday....

Dana White Says Kimbo/Liddell Fight Not Out Of The Realm Of Possibility
Last week,the UFC's mohawked maniac Chuck Liddell downplayed the success and viability of YouTube fighting phenom (and now EliteXC) figher Kimbo Slice, saying that the backyard brawler would get rocked in Mixed Martial Arts. Similar things have been said of Kimbo before, by plenty of other longtime ...

Erin Andrews' Calves Await Your Scrutiny
This candid photo of ESPN college sports vixen Erin Andrews attempting to gain the attention of a well-Under Armoured Tim Tebow suggests that the popular NCAA reporter princess is working very, very hard to get a salient quote from the Florida quarterback during the Gators annual spring game....

New York Now Free From The Menace Of Buried Cloth
There have been a little more than 9,000 unsolved murders in New York City since 1985; many of the victims buried in cement, do doubt. But thank God we've solved this case: The Yankees have dug up a Red Sox jersey on Sunday that had been planted beneath their new stadium by a construction worker. An...

Some Guy Other Than Tiger Wins Masters
There's something inherently charming about the ceremony that follows a Masters Championship. For winning the most prestigious golf tournament, you don't get a trophy, or a plaque, or an oversized check. You win a jacket. Here, friend, congratulations; have a jacket. Stay warm, friend....

About Last Night
What you missed while telling the Pope to stay off your lawn ... • NBA: Lakers cross the Rubicon, take control of Western Conference. • NHL: Taking a 3-0 lead and then giving up four unanswered, in the playoffs? That's gotta sting a little. Flames 4, Sharks 3. (Hmm, I think we may have identified th...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while patiently waiting for Tiger to turn it up a notch... • MLB: New York Yankees at Boston Red Sox. Sigh [ESPN] • Hockey: New Jersey Devils at New York Rangers and San Jose Sharks at Calgary Flames. [Versus] • Animation: The Simpsons. Thank god. [FOX]...

Wacky Waving Inflatable Arm Flailing Tube Man
The Visitor's Locker Room compares Green to a legendary infomercial pitchman, but I've always enjoyed this guy... ...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wondering why Tim Tebow's dad doesn't marry Jesus... • Boxing: Miguel Cotto vs. Alfonso Gomez and Antonio Margarito vs. Kermit Cintron. This card is awesome. • Boxing: Antonio Tarver vs. Clinton Woods and Chad Dawson vs. Glen Johnson. Large has a great rundown of the big fight ni...