w Page 5093 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hey, Better Than Shaq And The Fu-Schnickens
From our pal Orson at The Fanhouse comes this old promotional video for the Chinese table tennis team. (And don't you dare let us catch you trying to call it "ping pong." These young ping-pongers — dammit! — have a flow quite dope. And they seem very happy to be rapping, that's for sure....
Last Call For All Spelling Bee Bets!
The Scripps Howard National Spelling Bee — so lovingly run down by Mr. Daulerio — begins tomorrow, and, as always, the great minds at Throwing Things will be live-blogging the whole thing. Even though Mike and Mike are calling this thing, we still can't wait: The Spelling Bee remains one of our favo...
Roll On, Big Cheese, Roll On
If it somehow slipped your mind that Monday was the annual Gloucestershire Cheese Roll, don't worry; we're on the story. In the interests of full disclosure, though, we have to tell you that the video above is from last year's event. For this year's results, go here. So much to love in the video, ho...
We Hope You Nailed The Exacta
At the Hollywood Park horse racing track over the weekend, they tried the above gimmick. Ignoring the rather disturbing "bikini women as racing animals" undertone — the runners don't even seem to have names, including "Blazin' Blondie" and "Kieska" — we can't quite get past the announcer's "most of ...
Jose Canseco, Keeping Us Entertained For Nearly A Quarter Of A Century
Oh, 'tis a sad, sad day indeed when one is outwitted by Jose Canseco. As SportsbyBrooks so dutifly reported over the weekend, the man who once had a baseball bounce off his noggin for a home run has apparently convinced USA Today columnist Michael McCarthy that his non-existent TV reality show, Win ...
How To Detract Attention From Your Attractive Teenage Daughter
Problem: Nasty bloggers are spreading your 18-year-old pole vaulting daughter's picture across the Internets. (They can send all the letters to Ufford they want, but you can still find the picture here and here and about a million other places.) Solution: Scream your lungs out about it on the front ...
The Spurs, And The Playoffs, Are All About The Flop
If you needed concrete proof why many NBA fans have been dreading seeing the Spurs in the NBA Finals, last night's win over the Jazz provided it. It was a succession of flops, plods, slaps, free throws and Manu Ginobili. We know some just call this winning basketball; we think it's sucking all the l...
About Last Night
What you missed while enjoying the new side of Darth Vader... • NBA: Spurs lead Jazz 91-79 after three quarters in their ... wait, what? That's a final? • NHL: Year of the Duck ... Anaheim takes 1-0 lead over Senators. • MLB: Milestone for the Braves! No, Cox wasn't ejected; it was Jones' 350th home...
Stanley Cup Finals Pants Party: Ducks Vs. Senators
We're taking Memorial Day off, as you've surely noticed — though we're excited LeBron and the Jazz have given us something to pay attention to — but we are doing one post: A preview of the Stanley Cup Finals. They drop the puck tonight at 8 p.m. ET, with the Anaheim (Not Mighty) Ducks against the Ot...
One Series Is Alive ... Can We Make It Two?
As close as this series has been so far, we're just one Pistons victory away from it being totally lopsided. They've been so close on the road, most people believe the Cavs will be able to take at least a game at home. Except for Rasheed Wallace, who would lead you to believe that if the Pistons try...
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, TNT. NBA Playoffs. Detroit Pistons @ Cleveland Cavaliers. Another trip inside the playoff mind of Damon Jones. • 8:00, ESPN. MLB. Cleveland Indians @ Detroit Tigers. I can't help but root for a guy named Fausto. • 8:00, Comedy Central. Movie. Friday. Playing with my money is like playing wit...
Surprisingly, Norm Stewart Doesn't Speak Jive
Not that the black people in the video have anything to be particularly proud of, but ... Dear Lord, the white people. Coach Norm Stewart raps, and he's not the worst one. Greg Church, you're going to burn in hell for this....
To Watch Tonight...
• 8:00, ESPN2. NASCAR. Busch Series Carquest Auto Parts 300. I hope they let that stripper watch from her cell. • 8:30, ABC. NBA Playoffs. San Antonio Spurs @ Utah Jazz. I miss you, Hubie Brown. • 10:00, PPV. UFC 70. Chuck Liddell vs. Quinton Jackson. I'm pretty sure that Jimmy Snuka could take eith...
Why Yes, You Can Interest Caron Butler In Some Cake And Ice Cream
Caron Butler's been to both ends of the birthday party spectrum in the last year. Of course, there was Gilbert Arenas's blow-out, complete with ice sculpture, Busta Rhymes, and the Arenas Express Card....
They Grow Up So Fast These Days
Meet Malcolm Sheppard, defensive tackle for the Arkansas Razorbacks. According to Loser with Socks, that's Malcolm one year ago, and Malcolm today....
Most NASCAR Owners Started This Way
Because she adds to what already could be the most historic weekend ever for women in auto racing, let's take a second to appreciate the "NASCAR stripper."...
Of Ping Pong Balls And Dogfights
• A-Rod likes his balls. • Carl Monday remains unstoppable. • Clinton Portis likes it when dogs fight. • Dan Shanoff live blogged the draft lottery, and it was not a happy night for Celtics fans. • AJ Hawk will be more careful about wedding photographers in the future. • NBC switches from playoff ov...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as Hurley comes barreling into the living room in a van ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Anthony Peterson vs. Luis Ernesto Jose; junior welterweights, Lamont (Not Anthony) Peterson vs. John (Harper's Ferry) Brown, at Washington, D.C. [ESPN2] • College softball: NCAA Division I tournament, s...
Probably Just Best To Stay In The Tunnel, Ma'am
What happens when a Canadian attempts to sing the U.S. National Anthem? Nothing short of comedy gold, that's what. We don't know exactly how old this is, or what game it's from, but we've seen enough boring renditions of our country's cherished song to wish that they'd do it this way every time. Any...
We Know Where Lassie Will Be This Weekend
What's coming up in the world of minor league baseball ... we proudly present you with Rick Chandler's Minor Enterprise!...