w Page 5100 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Terry Bradshaw Under The Influence Of Jay Leno
What did Terry Bradshaw have to drink in the Tonight Show green room last night? On second thought, that's pretty much just standard Bradshaw, isn't it?...

And It Only Took Them 307 Years
Hey Bulldog: Former Jacksonville Jaguars assistant Tom Williams is hired at Yale, becoming the school's first black head football coach. [Hartford Courant]...

Yes, Virginia, There Are Other Buzzsaw Fans
An hour before the tailgating area in Glendale opened Saturday, I met more Arizona Cardinals fans than I'd met in my life. There were three. We were packing the car....

49ers Bid A High-Pitched, Frenetic Adieu To Joe Starkey
Joe Starkey is retiring as play-by-play voice of the 49ers. Don't recognize the name? He's the broadcaster who always sounds like his testicles are wired to a car battery, as this legendary clip demonstrates....

Versus Would Like To See Your "V"
Nobody receives or understands rodeo/hockey channel Versus, but they will quickly solve that problem with the magic of... ugh, "user generated content" and a not very well thought out web campaign....

The Return Of The Powerful Lip Fur, And Milton Bradley Is A Cub (Hide All Sharp Objects)
• No Way This Ends Badly. Cubs, Milton Bradley agree to sane, very thrifty three-year, $30 million deal, pending physical examination. Hopefully will not include psychological testing. [Chicago Tribune]...
![J.C. Romero Rises Up For [Dumb] Puerto Ricans Everywhere](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18f17vy5xtnrhjpg.jpg)
J.C. Romero Rises Up For [Dumb] Puerto Ricans Everywhere
This proves that J.C. Romero's hyper-excitement on the mound is not something manufactured just for his relief appearances....

Texas Waits For Final Minute To Eat Ohio State's Soul
So I guess anyone who thought the Fiesta Bowl was a giant made-to-order bowl of Buckeye Soup (ahem) had another thing coming. Hey, when you're right 52% of the time ......

Hey, $%&*@!? Hands Off The Sweater Vest, Mack
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

When The Spirit Moves Him, Kurt Warner Must Draw
Far be it from me to mock anyone's religious beliefs. A person's artistic skills, however, are open game. Here's Kurt Warner drawing God. Let's watch....

Employee No. 8 Nabbed For Early Morning DUI
Antoine Walker had the good sense to keep his mouth shut while the policeman filled out the report. A fan of brilliant sunrises, he was pulled over at 5:39 a.m. [AP]...

Sir <i>Le</i> Bron And The Legend of Crab Dribble
Where the hell did LeBron James come up with his ridiculous "crab dribble" yarn to explain away his traveling call against the Wizards? He's quite a storyteller!...

The New York Giants Love Them Some Applebee's
I know that technically they play in New Jersey, but ... come on, Dominik Hixon. Maybe you and your fellow wide receivers should step it up a notch. Have you tried Friendly's? [NJ.com]...

It's Time For Ohio State's Annual Butt Whupping
Gee, it seems like it was just twelve months ago that tOSU was getting their Buckeyes kicked in by an angry SEC team in their bowl game. Oh wait, that was two years ago....

SHOTY Title Game: Buzz Bissinger Vs. Baby Mangino
We have reached the SHOTY Final. It's probably the one we should have expected all along....

Jay Mariotti Column Commenting Is Back On The Air
One thing I failed to consider with the previous post; you can comment on Jay's columns now! This is fun we never had when he was at the Sun-Times....

Slamming Through, Don't F With Silverback
Pittsburgh Steelers' linebacking lunatic wins the AP Defensive Player of the Year Award. [PSAMP]...

Peyton Manning Won't Be Twittering Anytime Soon
"It's not the right fit for Peyton, he's not that spontaneous. If Peyton did it he would plan it all out and make sure he did the best - he wouldn't have any typos." [NYT]...

Michael Phelps' Sacred Mission: To Sell Japanese Cars In China
Michael Phelps Inc.™® is returning to Beijing, this time to provide every man, woman and child with a brand new car. Expect gas here to be $9 per gallon by next year....

The ESPN.Com Redesign Experience Is Now Open For Business
Also, please face forward and remain seated and wait until the ride comes to a complete stop....