w Page 5104 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as your iPod takes matters into its own hands and erases all Phish songs ... • MLB: Seattle at Boston. It's Matsuzaka vs. Ichiro! Everybody run before they destroy the city! [ESPN2] • NBA: Orlando at Detroit. Pistons conquer the East. [ESPN] • NHL: Playoffs, conference quarterfinals, P...

Naked Swimmers Dancing
When you're a swimmer at the University of South Carolina, we suspect life can become boring from time to time. Therefore, one must streak!...

Ohio State Grapplers Like To Shake It
So last week, the Ohio State wrestling team entered into some talent show that was judged, along with others, by Buckeyes football coach Jim Tressel (he's also judging the talent show at Maurice Clarett's prison). It wasn't necessarily a bad year for OSU wrestling, but if this video is any indicatio...

Bill Romanowski Just Can't Quit You
With inflation being what it is, we feel that we have to be very prudent with our entertainment dollar. That's why we will only see new movies with the following fun synopsis:...

It Seems Difficult To Lose 57-1
We're kind of suckers for these types of stories: One team so much more talented than another team that it absolutely eviscerates them at a too-violent-for-small-children level. This is one of the better ones in a while; Bridgewater State (Mass.) beat Newbury 57-1....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while wishing your sister a happy 27th birthday ... • MLB: Washington at Atlanta [TBS]; , Chicago White Sox at Oakland. Finally, two games which won't be snowed out. [WGN] • Soccer: UEFA Champions League, quarterfinals, second leg, Chelsea at Valencia, Spain. Strictly speaking, does th...

Look At All The Dumb Athletes!
Every year, as the NFL Draft approaches, the results of each player's Wunderlic scores inevitably leak out. This appears to serve only one purpose: To allow us to mock athletes for being so stupid. This is, we believe, a perfectly healthy aspect of being a sports fan; we are so cognizant of our phys...

NBA Roundup: Golden Opportunity
Notes on Monday's games in the National Basketball Association ......

The Daily Closer: A-Rod Will Accept Your Apology Now
Notes from a day in baseball:...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as Luc Longley carries you and the TV out of the burning house ... • Arena Football: Georgia at Philadelphia. Nicknames? We're lost. Anyone? [ESPN2] • Baseball: New York Yankees at Minnesota. Welcome to the Snow Globe. [ESPN] • NBA: Pistons at Knicks. It's all right now, I learned my l...

Who's Sorry Now? Old Leatherface Edition
Does WFAN have an ombudsman? Because someone needs to tell the network to place Don Imus in a block of ice and shove him toward Greenland, where he can be unfrozen sometime in the future when they figure out a cure for old. Why was Imus racially taunting the Rutgers basketball team again? Not even h...

Last Chance For Midwest Pants Party Tickets
A while back, we let you know about The Deadspin Midwest Pants Party, coming this May to U.S. Cellular Field. Well, this is the last week to get tickets, so we figured we'd remind you....

The Big Lead, Schrutebag And The Feisty New Ombudsman
Say what you will about ESPN executive editor John Walsh, but he definitely made a fascinating choice hiring Le Anne Schreiber as the Leader's new ombudsman. Schreiber weighed in on the whole Schrutebag-Big Lead issue over the weekend, and she pulled no punches....

Tiger, Or The No Name?
In almost every sport other than golf, we are conditioned to root for the underdog. When it comes down to the final moments, when two competitors face off for the ultimate prize, we feel compelled to get behind the guy trying to win his first title, rather than watching the old champion get another ...

To Watch Tonight...
• MLB. Boston Red Sox @ Texas Rangers. You're going to want to hop aboard the Sammy Sosa bandwagon sometime soon. 8:00, ESPN. • Red Stripe Champions Cup. Boys Town FC vs. Portmore United. I hope the cup is presented to the champion by the guy in the Red Stripe commercials. I like him. 7:00, Fox Socc...

I Hope There's A Really Nice Trophy For Him
I'm all for setting world records and general feelings of accomplishment, but I usually stop when any of the following are involved:...

Let's Celebrate A Resurrection
The resurrection of Christ is being celebrated everywhere today (my apologies for violating the separation of church and Deadspin, especially to the many Deadspin readers who are proud, Godless heathens), so I thought we'd go in a different direction here and celebrate a couple of other equally-impo...

A Slight Departure From Billy Packer
With the NCAA tournament gone, and CBS putting Billy Packer back in his cryogenic chamber for 11 months, I thought we were entitled to some commentators with more of a sense of joy....

To Watch Tonight...
• College Hockey. NCAA Tournament, Final. It's Michigan State vs. Boston College, but I'm not ruling out Florida finding a way to win the national title. 7:00, ESPN. • College Softball. Arizona State @ Arizona. That girl with the ponytail is primed for a breakout year. 10:00, ESPN2. • Toronto FC @ C...

Jim Nantz Is The Master
If you love scrambling for pars and conservative golf (as opposed to all the extreme high-risk golf out there), you should love today's Masters coverage. The course continues to play very tough, with most of today's players being well over par. A few have gotten to red numbers, though, with Tiger Wo...