w Page 5121 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

About Last Night ...
What you missed while writing a musical based on the movie "Fargo" ... • Puberty — nature's steroids. Hawaii wins Little League World Series. • Speaking of steroids: Giambi's 7 RBI lift Yankees. • Danica Patrick proves that women drivers are just as capable as men when it comes to ... wait, she just...

To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Remembering That Tonight's Yet Another Anniversary Of A Breakup ... · Toronto Blue Jays at New York Yankees. You know how they used to say every egg you ate took five minutes off your life. We think Yankees losses are like that with George Steinbrenner, except it's like an hour. ...

All Hail The Fourth Estate
We find it strange that "60 Minutes" second-place curmudgeon Mike Wallace has such a fascination with Dolphins stoner Ricky Williams, but apparently he does: He's in Dolphins camp this week for another round of interviews. Remember when you used to be scared when Mike Wallace came to interview yo...

A Different Kind Of White Sox
Wondering why the White Sox have been playing so poorly lately? It's the panties. Perhaps we should elucidate. Apparently, ChiSox outfielder Timo Perez, to help end a slump, has been hanging "extra-large panties" around the clubhouse in an attempt to pull the team out of its tailspin....

Buzzsaw Savior Finally Gets MVP Trophy
We feel like we should let you know this: We are a part of the vast pro-Arizona Cardinals media conspiracy. We're not some Johnny Come Latelys either; we have loved The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals since they were in St. Louis. We know there is an excess of Arizona Cardinals coverage, so ...

Dontrelle Willis Did Not Land On Plymouth Rock
We hadn't noticed — because we're devils, of course — but something rare happened in baseball yesterday: Two black starting pitchers went against each other. Florida's Dontrelle Willis earned his 17th win over the Dodgers' Edwin Jackson, and it has the always sane folks at Black Athlete comparing...

Larry Bowa, Civic Wonder
To combine reality and fantasy for a moment, ESPN analyst Larry Bowa has been named a Distinguished Little League Graduate award. In response, the ever-refined Larry Bowa responded through the great Yard Work:...

About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Having Nightmares About That "Ranch Tooth" In The Wendy's Commercial ... · Yankees Secure Three-Way Wildcard Tie With Cleveland And Oakland. Somewhere, Woody Allen, Drew Carey and Hammer are in a furious battle. · Cardinals Knock Magic Number Down To 26. Tony LaRussa celebrates...

To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Trying To Get Out Of Painting ... · NFL: Dallas Cowboys at Seattle Seahawks: Enjoy a good quarter of people's names you barely recognize. But hey, John Madden's there. · MLB: Atlanta Braves at Chicago Cubs: It's always annoying when two SuperStation teams play each other. · Littl...

Today In Oddjack
What you're missing over at Oddjack, the site for both the discerning speculator and the degenerate gambler ... · You can bet on Dontrelle Willis, or you can just take a nap at lunch. · Hey, look, you can bet on the Little League World Series. That's making the world a better place. · Time to bet on...

Stomach Stapling Browns Fans. There Is No God
OK, we know SI's Peter King is losing weight like mad and everything, so it's obviously on its mind. He still has a pretty amazing scoop in MMQB today:...

Leftovers: Gates Back, Not Back, We're Confused
· Chargers tight end Antonio Gates signs contract but suspended for first game. Fantasy owners tiptoe toward ledge. [San Diego Union-Tribune] · Felix Potvin will not play in Russia. Neither will Antonio Gates, actually. [Eklund's Hockey Rumors] · Browns trade receiver to Patriots, guaranteeing immed...

Blogdom's Best: Jettising The Big Unit
News And Views From Microwaved Dinners And Used USB Ports ... · Yankees fans have had just about enough of Randy Johnson. [Pinstrip Alley] · Look out next year for those crazy Toronto Blue Jays. [Beyond The Boxscore] · Royals bloggers are documenting the beauty of winning two in a row and trying to ...

College: Let's Bring In The Steroids Guy!
Baseball Musings points out a story we hadn't noticed (though it's still early in the morning): Jason Giambi's trainer is the new strength coach for alls ports at the University of Cal-Santa Barbara. Baseball Musings finds this worriesome, to say the least:...

The Day Of Rumor Reckoning
Well, today's the day. The Interweb has been all abuzz with rumors for days now that Roger Clemens/Johnny Damon/Gary Sheffield were about to be squashed under the steroid hammer of MLB. The Web was so a-twitter about everything that even the dinosaur print reporters noticed what was going on. (Dan...

About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Telling Your Friends Not To Tell You What You Missed On "Six Feet Under" ... · 49ers Lineman Dies. Still confusion about cause. Sean Penn investigating. · Cards' Rolen To Miss Rest Of Season. Manager Tony LaRussa consoles himself by playing with puppies. · Eli Manning's Elbow "...

About Last Night ...
What You Missed While Watching The Office Ladies Attack The Copy Machine Repairman ... · Clemens Roughed Up In Loss. We tell you, that guy's too old to pitch. · Phils, Nats Split Huge Doubleheader. Sharing is good, you guys. Don't get greedy. · Bears, Benson Still Far Apart On Contract. The good new...

To Watch Tonight ...
What To Watch While Secretely Believing Your iPod Is Trying To Kill You · Arizona Diamondbacks at St. Louis Cardinals. Tomorrow night, we will be at Busch Stadium. Tonight, we'll be putting together shelves. Tomorrow wins. · New Orleans Saints at New England Patriots. When ESPN Classic repeats this ...

T.O. Mania Continues To Ensue
This little kid, "Jeremy," claims to be Terrell Owens' biggest fan, but one who is saddened by his current exploits. Still, he's selling T-shirts (of course) that say "F.U.T.O. (For You, T.O.)" on his Web site. We love it when Philly fans get all clever and figure out how to use the computer....

Blogdom's Best: The Last Great Hockey Blogger
· Complete rundown of NHL TV deal from the last man who cares. [Off Wing Opinion · Some offseason news on the New Jersey Nets. Wee! [Can't Stop The Bleeding] · Yankees bloggers now turning on Joe Torre. [Pinstripe Alley] · People would hate the Padres for winning the World Series. [Gaslamp Ball]...