w Page 5156 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you pine for the NHL ... • MLB: Arizona Diamondbacks at San Diego Padres. You stay classy, Whale's Vagina. [Channel 4 Padres] • Minor League Baseball: Triple-A Bricktown Showdown, Toledo (International League champion) vs. Tucson (Pacific Coast League champion), at Oklahoma City. Mr...
Chris Fowler, Mrs. BodyShaping
Remember "BodyShaping?" That old ESPN show that featured, uh, people in Spandex lifting things and hopping around at a location of indistinguishable but distinctly beach-like flavor? Well, the host of that show was a woman named Jennifer Dempster, and, as MJD touched on this weekend, she recently ma...
Mets Fans Are Having A Nice Morning
As established late last night, the Mets clinched the National League East last night behind the gorgeous athletic stylings of Jose Valentin....
Great. MORE New York Teams In The Postseason
Congratulations to the New York Mets, who shook off the vexing enigma that is the Pittsburgh Pirates and beat the Florida Marlins 4-0 tonight to clinch the National League East title. They're the first team to punch the proverbial ticket to the playoffs, and now we can all breathe a sigh of relief t...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch instead of, you know, doing this ... • MNF: Pittsburgh at Jacksonville. Only one NFL game tonight? Ripoff! [ESPN] • Basketball: Women's world championships, second round, USA vs. Czech Republic, at Sao Paolo, Brazil. Women must reclaim the men's honor. (Sigh), as usual. [FSN] • MLBl: A...
In Case It Slipped Your Mind, Ohio State Still Hates Michigan
For the record, we're pretty sure that the Pat Forde-recommended Dead Schembechlers hate the University of Michigan more than any punk band ever hated anything, and that's saying something. So if you also hate the Wolverines, you won't want to miss the Hate Michigan Rally on Nov. 17 in Columbus, hea...
To Watch Tonight...
• MLB. Boston Red Sox @ New York Yankees. I heard that the standings don't matter when these two teams play. 8:00, ESPN. • Movie. Major League. Forget about the curve ball, Ricky. Give 'em the heater. 8:00, ESPN Classic. • NFL. Washington Redskins @ Dallas Cowboys. I just wish NBC would find a way t...
Michael Irvin, Koren Robinson, And Ricky Williams Have A Song For You
Click icon to play video ...
That's Never Been MY Experience
Do me a favor. Click this link, check out the headline, then come back. I'll wait....
To Watch Tonight...
• College Football: Clemson @ Florida State. 7:45, ESPN. To me, the Bowden vs. Bowden storyline never really gets old. • College Football: Florida @ Tennessee. 8:00, ESPN. I know that Steve Spurrier is elsewhere now, but it wouldn't kill him to keep talking trash on Tennessee. • College Football: Ne...
At Last, Some Attention For Water Polo
I don't feel like we have enough stories here on Deadspin that feature high school boys having their clothes confiscated by school administrators. Today, I seek to right this wrong....
Week In Deadspin: Clap Your Hands Say "Cough"
• If you can't punch a bouncer for yelling at you for bringing underage girls into a bar, jeez, what's the point of playing quarterback? • Everybody get fired up about your prostate! • It's not barking anymore: Now Browns fans steal your wheels. And then they poop on towels! • "Hey, Rob!" • You know...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you dream that on his next CD, Bob Dylan will cover only Lindsay Lohan tunes ... • College football: Kansas at Toledo. Rocket home opener! Please do not leave smudges on the Glass Bowl.[ESPN2] • Golf: PGA Tour, The 84 Lumber Classic, second round, at Farmington, Pa. Michelle Wie lik...
Nothing Says "Sloth" Like A Long College Football Saturday
As has been established, tomorrow is a day for much gluttony/sloth/greed/skinny ladies' head in the box: seven pretty outstanding college football games. And no, we're not referring to Syracuse-Illinois. We are actually offended that the game is on television....
That's All For Whitlock At Page 2
Yesterday, The Big Lead picked up on a throwaway line in a Scoop Jackson chat and postulated that Jason Whitlock could be the next in line to leave the apparently sinking ship that is ESPN Page 2. Considering that Whitlock and Scoop are hardly the best of friends, we weren't quite sure how much fait...
This Baby Is Not A Public Relations Stooge
Continuing in the grand tradition of cute tiny babies being terrified by professional athletes photos — a genre that hit its pinnacle with this legendary shot — we present this photo of Stephon Marbury, about to be backhanded by a child who doesn't want those cheap-ass ugly shoes....
The Closer: The AL Central, As Written By The Coen Brothers
Notes from a day in baseball:...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while pleasantly yachting ... • College football: Maryland at West Virginia. Understandably, we have Owen Schmitt Fever. [ESPN] • High school football: Shreveport (La.) Evangel at Southlake Carroll, Texas. Thursday Night Lights. [FSN] • MLB: Philadelphia at Atlanta. In Bizzaro World, P...
Imagine What They'll Call It When They Actually Use It
Far be it from us to pretend to be experts in branding, but this new marketing gimmick for the Cleveland Browns, obviously a "riff" (and "riff" is being generous) on the Steelers' Terrible Towel, is actually called The Dirty Brown Towel....
Apparently, Jose Lima Isn't The Only Singer Out There
If you weren't satisfied with Bill Simmons' iTunes mix — remember, by the way, tonight's Mr. Simmons' curious appearance on "The Colbert Report," so set Tivos to "stun" — our friendly overlords at Gawker Media are here to help....