w Page 5165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight...
• NASCAR. Busch Series, Kroger 200. Talledega Nights taught me all about the slingshot maneuver. 9:00, TNT. • World Cup Soccer. Czech Republic vs. United States. If the MLS All-Star Game didn't convince you that we still suck at soccer... Oops. 10:00, ESPNU. • NFL. Green Bay Packers Intrasquad Scrim...

Week In Deadspin: We Miss The Chorizo Already
• You bring us the chorizo, and then you take it away. Do not tease us with your chorizo. • Whither the white wide receiver. • Interesting strategy to sell video games. • Mike Tirico would rather you not bring this up again. • Here is what is inside Bobby Abreu's head. • Smell Jeter! • If Simmons ...

To Watch Tonight
What you missed while deciding, apropos of nothing, to work late on Friday ... • Boxing: Anthony Peterson vs. Jose Soto, at Memphis. What division is this? Flyweight? Paperweight? Pantyweight? [ESPN2] • Extreme sports: X Games, at Carson, Calif. Have you ever taken your bike off of some sweet jumps?...

Gentlemen, Start Your Wanking
Right now Carl Monday is snapping down the protective visor on his riot helmet, scrambling into the back of the WKYC Action News van and yelling "Let's roll!" Yes, the big Masturbate-A-Thon is tomorrow,* which, if you live in Europe, still leaves you plenty of time to get to Drop Studios in London...

Joe Torre, Back When He Had To Work A Little Bit
Even among people who hate the Yankees, there is a grudging respect for manager Joe Torre, who exemplifies class, stoicism and wisdom in a game that many consider often lacking in all three....

Finally Making Some Money Off Southeast Jerome
Fully capitalizing on something it stumbled across last season, the official Redskins site Redskins.com is now selling T-shirts adorned with every Clinton Portis character from his press conferences last year. Those who were with us last season will remember our schoolgirl crush on Portis, particu...

"You Want Me To Do That With You?"
The mad geniuses at Free Darko aren't taking the summer off: They're finding absolute gems like this video, which features Timberwolves superstar Kevin Garnett gets his Bob Harris on while visiting an Asian television show....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after coming upon a scene of cruel, wanton destruction ... • Basketball: Men's national teams, USA vs. Puerto Rico, at Las Vegas. Let the utter disappointment begin. [ESPN2] • Extreme sports: X Games, at Carson, Calif. Step off, George! [ESPN] • MLB: Cleveland at Boston. To save time, ...

Your Unwarranted Kevin Costner Update
You can always tell how Kevin Costner's career is going by how much he remembers he "loves the beautiful game of baseball." When he was stalling in the late '90s, he tried to recapture the Bull Durham-Field Of Dreams magic with For The Love Of The Game, a movie so dull and torpid that you'd never be...

God, Training Camp Is So Disgusting
Far be it from us to tell any football team how to run their business, particularly during the big petri dish of sweat and blood and all kinds of other disgusting things in the midst of training camp, but we suspect a new policy the 'Skins have put into place might have been worthwhile to institut...

Buyer Beware ... And Beware Again ... And Beware Again
In a classic Oh, Now You Tell Us moment, Philadelphia owner Jeffrey Lurie has suddenly realized that, aw, jeez, maybe it wasn't actually the best of ideas to bring in wide receiver Terrell Owens....

Ah, Fun With PC Goodness
If you're a Yankees fan so obsessed with your team that you require daily tidbits of minutiae to get through your workday, you might have one of those daily desk calendars. (We have one for "The Far Side.") Fishbowl NY has pointed out the above entry for yesterday, August 2, in which the copy-editin...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as the last surviving munchkins steal your car ... • Boxing: Featherweights, Rogers Mtagwa vs. Alvin Brown, at Philadelphia. How come ESPN boxing isn't like the fight scenes in the Rocky movies? [ESPN2] • MLB: Philadelphia at St. Louis. Hit streak or not, I'm going for a beer. [ESPN] •...

Minor Enterprise: Baby, You Can Drive My Car
Welcome to Minor Enterprise, where we preview, and occasionally review, the great events of minor league baseball. Each Wednesday we'll take a look at the promotions, players and mascots which populate our minor league ballparks; the unsung heroes of our national pastime. (Minor Enterprise not res...

Four Tiny Tidbits On: The Western Athletic Conference
We must confess that we can't wait each year for the crunch of shoulder pads; for cleats churning up chunks of turf and red-faced coaches screaming from the sidelines. But enough about lacrosse. College football season is upon us, and to celebrate, we're going to get back into tiny tidbit mode and p...

What Drives Bobby Abreu
Bobby Abreu made his debut for the New York Yankees last night, going 0-for-3 with a walk as the Yankees took over first place for the first time in almost two months. It's a love fest in the Bronx so far, which is to say, it has been about 24 hours....

Jay Mariotti Has Returned
Fret not, loyal Chicago-area readers: Your long national nightmare is now over. After a month-long "vacation" that followed Ozzie Guillen Fag-gate, Chicago Sun-Times "columnist" Jay Mariotti has signed a three-year deal with the paper, assuring his smiling face will grace the paper's pages four days...

Some Things You Hear That You Can't Unhear
We just don't get the French. The fastest-selling song in France, nay, in all of Europe, is Coup de Boule (The Headbutt), which was produced as a "joke" by a couple of music producers in Paris to ease the pain of their country's World Cup loss to Italy. But now France's loss is also our loss, as thi...

Save The Chorizo!
We can all agree that we give much love to the chorizo, slight discomfort with cheap ethnic pandering aside. The chorizo has taken the country by storm! Considering there isn't that much more to talk about in relation to Milwaukee Brewers baseball right now, you'd think the chorizo would be out ther...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you put the finishing touches on your new line of adult swaddling clothes ... • WNBA: Indiana at Detroit; Houston at Sacramento. Be the first in your family to watch an entire WNBA doubleheader. [ESPN2] • MLB: Blue Jays at Yankees. Come watch New York bask in its Abreu-ness. [YES Ne...