w Page 5208 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Is Eli Manning Today's Joe Namath? Lord, We Hope Not
If it's true that every generation gets the hero they deserve ... woe to us, America, because there's a very real possibility that Eli Manning could be today's Joe Namath. That's a somewhat terrifying concept....

Why Do We Deny The Awesomeness Of The Red Wings?
The NHL Closer is written by Greg Wyshynski, of The FanHouse and The Fourth Period. He is also the author of Glow Pucks And 10-Cent Beer....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while packing your cat ... • College basketball: Iowa State at Kansas (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN]; Georgia Tech at N.C. State (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN2]. Picture-in-picture, we need you now more than ever. • NBA: Los Angeles Lakers at San Antonio (9 p.m., ET). Time for the Lakers to begin their annu...

No Worries, Everyone: The Wrestlers Do Not Have Herpes. Sorry For The False Alarm.
Yeah, see, now this is a tough spot: A California high school thought it had an outbreak of herpes on its hands. (And its lips ... and its ...) So they announced to everyone that herpes had attacked. Obviously, everyone looked at the wrestling team. And now it turns out there's no herpes at all....

For Those Who Can't Handle The Sheer Intensity Of Cards On TV
There was this couple-of-month stretch when poker on TV was actually sort of cool, right before the world discovered the ancient game of Bejeweled. But now poker needs a renaissance. It needs a voice. It needs — you guessed it — radio coverage....

Charlie White Is An Ice-Devouring Sex Tornado
Charlie White is just your typical kid from Michigan. By the time he was a teenager, he realized that ice hockey just wasn't for him — even though he had led his club team, the Detroit Wolverines, to a state title. No, he wanted to be much more creative on the ice. He wanted to dance....

Larry Brown Is Happy Not To Be In New York Anymore
Larry Brown offers us a fond, cute little footnote in the epic catastrophe that is 2007 SHOTY winner Isiah Thomas' tenure with the New York Knicks. Brown wasn't exactly Mr. Sunshine and Rainbows with that team — and he clearly stopped giving a crap 10 games in — but Isiah has made sure that Brown wi...

Your Prayers For More Carlos Mencia Have Been Answered
When someone convinces Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas to reprise their Bob and Doug MacKenzie characters for a beer ad, that's when I'll get excited about a Super Bowl commercial. Until then we've got Carlos Mencia, who will be featured in a Bud Light Super Bowl spot this year. Hey, where's everybody ...

Hey, At Least SOMEONE Was Calling In
We remember the old days, back when we were dorfing around at the Daily Illini, of media conference calls with Big Ten coaches. Gene Keady would ramble on too long, Lou Henson would drone that earnest whine of his and Bob Knight, of course, would never show up. It was strange, really, to have a phon...

Dramatic New Footage Surfaces Of Tom Brady Walking
Tom Brady WILL be at the dance tonight, girls. He WILL be there. I'm paraphrasing Bill Murray in Meatballs, but you get the picture. So, Brady's "high ankle sprain" is not as serious as many believed (hoped?) ... unless they're now making walking casts in pointy-toed dress shoe designs. He showed up...

Another Reason To Yammer About Tom Brady All Week
SCANDALOUS celebrity Web site TMZ was the first to post the pictures of Tom Brady's "boot cast thing" — trademark Deadspin! — and it is everyone in a tizzy. We quite love the idea of John Clayton and Len Pasquarelli digging through TMZ for more Tom Brady injury updates....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch while caressing your newest, proudest possession: Gary Coleman's pants ... • College basketball: Michigan at Wisconsin (7 p.m., ET); Tennessee at Kentucky (9 p.m., ET). Say hello to Kige if you go. [ESPN] • NHL: Boston at Montreal (7:30 p.m., ET). So much better than televised fishing,...

Giants Running Back Once Couldn't Even Outrun The Five-Oh
One of the nice aspects of the Super Bowl is that, with the media clusterphooey descending on the game, smaller stories that people might not know about lesser-known players. OK, actually, this is one of those theoretically nice things; it never actually happens this way, which is why, we repeat, yo...

This Guy Hasn't Washed His Face Since 2004
They've announced the villain in the next Batman movie, and this one's the most insidious of all. His powers include super smugness, a photographic memory that does not include anything prior to 2001, and invisibility (should the conversation turn to the Bruins). Only posted comment to his photo so...

Tom Coughlin's Audacious Hands Of Hope And Joy
As much as we enjoyed the Giants-Packers NFC Championship Game on Sunday — we were hardly rooting for the Giants, but hey, what's more exciting than a guy finally hitting a game-winning field goal on his third try? — we found it somewhat disorienting: We are absolutely not used to see Giants coach T...

This Defense Would Require A Rather Intense Glove
We've always wondered what inspires people to attend a professional bowling event; it's not nearly as exciting as it looks like in Kingpin. But now that we've seen this guy's sign, we understand a little bit....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN scoured its message boards this morning to find its cleverest, boldest, most insightful comment, and chose this one above all others ......

Now The Knicks Are Pummeling The Reporters
In November, we told you about the pure bliss that went into being a beat reporter following the New York Knicks. (Note: We are employing The Sarcasm there.) But covering the Knicks doesn't just involve hating yourself and your choice of career; it can actively mean being beaten up by security....

Somewhere There's A Tom Brady Voodoo Doll With A Pin In Its Foot
Your chances of seeing Matt Gutierrez at quarterback in the Super Bowl just improved slightly on Monday, as Tom Brady was spotted hobbling down a New York sidewalk in a foot cast. Now what this means is not clear; all that we know for certain is that Brady's foot speed is pretty much unchanged. My g...

The Six Storylines You're Already Sick Of
Because we're all gonna be hearing every single storyline between now and two freaking weeks from now, let's go ahead and run the obvious ones down, right here, to get 'em out of the way....