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From the People Will Auction Anything Online file ......
About Last Night
What you missed while you, Malcolm and Reese finally find Dewey ... • MLB: Ladies and gents, we give you the first place Arizona Diamondbacks. • Swimming: I don't know what a natatorium is, and if I fell in a pool I'd probably sink. Brendan Hansen doesn't have these problems at the U.S. swim champio...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you've finished drug testing the high school band ... • MLB: San Francisco at Los Angeles Dodgers. Barry not expected to play today. Just to mess with his head, this should be the one game that Hank Aaron attends. [ESPN2] • WNBA: Detroit at San Antonio; Sacramento at Seattle. Yep...
Theismann Still Bitching About MNF Firing
We're sure there are people out there other than Joe Theismann and Washington Post columnist Leonard Shapiro who will miss Theismann on "Monday Night Football" broadcasts next year. We just can't find any of them....
The Report From The Arena Bowl
The man in this picture is Jay Gruden, the younger brother of Jon Gruden and the head coach of the AFL's Orlando Predators. He was one of the many luminaries at the Arena Bowl over the weekend, and the guys from It's Still Football were there. They filed a full report for us, which is after the jum...
NFL Season Preview: Kansas City Chiefs
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....
Do Not Bother Pujols While He Is Pop-A-Shotting
From the random and bizarre corner of our sports planet, Gas Lamp Ball has photos of Albert Pujols randomly playing Pop-A-Shot at a Chuck-E-Cheese. (We love Chuck-E-Cheese, by the way.)...
Childhood's End
What were you doing when you were five? (My answer revolves around cartoons and mud). Sacramento-area native Jan Silva is attending a tennis academy in France, all expenses paid. In fact, the academy's owner, Patrick Mouratoglou, will pay an estimated $140,000 this year to train him. Did I mention t...
Matt Leinart Schmoozes Like A Champion
When you're a fan of an NFL team, all you can hope is that your team's leader is setting his sights on the ultimate prize: The Super Bowl. If he's not trying to win the whole thing, what's the point? A championship is all that matters. And clearly, Buzzsaw quarterback / Patch Adams buddy Matt Leinar...
In The Aftermath Of The Still-Uncompleted Garnett Trade
Though it's still not "official," it's pretty much a given now that Kevin Garnett is going to be a Celtic. This is an odd matter for us to wrap our minds around; we had sort of assumed Garnett would die a Timberwolf, no matter what he wanted....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch while shooing away the cat ... • MLB: Philadelphia at Chicago Cubs. We welcome our new Cub overlords. [ESPN] • MLB: Baseball Hall of Fame Induction from Cooperstown. Relive the glory of Tony Gwynn saying "passion for the game" 114 times. [ESPN2] • World Combat League: Oklahoma at Dalla...
Don't Everybody Rush To Subscribe To The Big Ten Network (Like You Can Anyway)
The M Zone brings up something that has us thoroughly depressed: The upcoming launch of the Big Ten Network....
Athletes, As Drawn By The People At The County Fair
The gentle souls over at The Sports Hernia have started a series that's near and dear to our heart: A look at some of the most ridiculous sports T-shirt caricatures throughout history....
R.I.P. Bill Walsh
As you've surely heard by now, legendary 49ers head coach Bill Walsh has died. He was 75 years old, which is older than we realized; something about the guy always seemed young to us....
Sports' Other Famous Dogfighter
In case you're one of the people who would love to see Michael Vick tossed into jail for a decade while he deals with his own rape stand, it might be instructive to look at the case of former Portland Trail Blazer Qyntel Woods....
NFL Season Preview: Indianapolis Colts
Believe it or not, folks, the NFL season is much closer than you can possibly imagine. So close, in fact, that, if we're going to fit in every NFL team preview by the start of the season, we have to go this early. So there you have it....
Another Demographic Infuriated By ESPN
We are definitively not NASCAR experts, which takes away one of ours — and many sports fans' — favorite pastimes: Making fun of ESPN coverage of sporting events. Fortunately, the NASCAR diehards are taking care of that for us ... and they're stomping mad this morning....
What Not To Do With A Golf Cart
An absolutely bizarre story from Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia, and proof that you should always be careful with your golf carts....