w Page 5277 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I Say, Jolly Good Performance By Venus Williams
Contrary to popular belief, Venus Williams is still playing tennis. (Kind of like when I saw Paul Shuey pitching for the Orioles last night. In fact, it's EXACTLY the same thing.) She made the Wimbledon final against Marion Bartoli, a tennis player you may remember hearing about first in this senten...
It's A Football Score! Get It?
Guys, We Were Closer When We Gave Up 20 Runs. Go ahead. Make the joke. "It's a football score!" Haw haw haw! Because, see, 20-14 is the kind of final score you might see in an NFL game. But you never hear the joke "Wow, maybe they were playing lacrosse!" Or, "Golly, looks like he should have hit on ...
Saturday Afternoon Stuff To Watch
12 p.m. — Drag Racing: NHRA Sportsman Series in Norwalk, Ohio [ESPN2] 12:15 p.m. — Movie: Best In Show [TBS] 1 p.m. — 2003 ALCS Game 7, Red Sox at Yankees [ESPN Classic] 3 p.m. — PGA Tour: AT&T National, Third Round [CBS] 3 p.m. — Arena Football Playoffs: Colorado Crush at San Jose SaberCats [ESPN] ...
About Last Night ...
• MLB: Cleveland pitched fairly well against Toronto. Except for that one inning. • U-20 Soccer: Never did a Brazilian think USA's kids could beat Brazil's kids, let alone be schooled by a teenager named "Jozy." • Wimbledon: Bartoli upsets Henin. It doesn't say how, so I'll assume she stole her husb...
If You Were A Veggie Hot Dog, Would It Be OK To Eat Yourself?
• God, the hot dog eating championships are fun. • John Patterson, get thee to Canada. Don't tell Spencer Hawes! • 45 seconds ... starting NOW. • Cursing at Yankee Stadium? Now we've seen EVERYTHING! • Dan LeBatard would like to keep Harold Reynolds away from his women. • MJD left us, but he is not ...
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you walk out a wiser, weaker man ... • Boxing: Lightweights, Nate "Glen" Campbell vs. Wilson "Home Improvement" Alcorro, at Tampa. [ESPN2] • MLB: Atlanta at San Diego. Petco's cavernous outfield no-man's land must be fed! [TBS] • Soccer: FIFA Under-20 World Cup, USA vs. Brazil, at O...
You've All Been Working For The Weekend
After The Mighty MJD's heartfelt goodbye last weekend — after more than a year of serving as our weekend editor — the speculation has been immense. (Really!) Who's gonna take over for MJD? Well, considering it's Friday, we should probably tell you....
What Will Be Cut From This Year's ESPY Awards?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Jason Witten's Forging Momma
So, just to bring you back up to speed, in the world of outstanding sports moms, we have:...
The Orem Owlz Medium Is The Message
For years, we have watched the totalitarian media/mind control tactics of the rookie-level Pioneer League team the Orem Owlz with a wary eye. They have sat there, in their megalomaniacal castle in Utah, acting as if they are the rulers of all the survey, wielding their power indiscriminately and wit...
Bad Day For Neshek
It was a bad day all around for Pat, who suffered his first loss last night. Fortunately, his beautiful designed Web site — not that we should talk — will keep updating, and even putting up these in-no-way-uncomfortable-to-watch videos. Next year, Pat. Next year....
The Brewers Meet The Furries
When the Milwaukee Brewers played in Pittsburgh this week, they ended up staying at the same hotel as a Furry Convention. (It's actually the Furry Convention.) That's Bob Uecker and one of them above. The notion of the Milwaukee Brewers hanging out in the same hotel as Furries might seem funny to ...
We Doubt Anna Benson Would Have Stood For This
To wrap up today, here's yet another example of just how weird professional athletes are, from a few days ago: They sometimes live in a batting cage. That's what the Angels' Reggie Willits does, anyway....
To Watch Tonight
What to watch as ... wait, I missed what? ... • MLB: Atlanta at Los Angeles Dodgers. Would you like a Betemit? Careful, they're hot. [TBS] • Motor sports: Rolex Sports Car Series, Brumos Porsche 250, at Daytona Beach, Fla. Ironically, this never seems to start on time. [Speed Channel] • Soccer: MLS,...
MLB Gets Its Rockwell On
Sure, Major League Baseball might have had a little trouble figuring out that whole steroid issue thing, but it's nice to be made aware that they've got their finger on the pulse of one of the game's most serious problems: Time wasting....
Why We Can't Hang Out With Gamblers
At Least Some Poker Players Are Athletes [Shakedown Sports]...
Softball Players Are No Good At Word Games
Burnt Orange Nation ran an interview with former Texas softball pitcher Cat Osterman on Monday, at the end of which Osterman was asked to play a little word association (a recurring BON interview theme). While obviously a talented hurler, Osterman sadly bobbled this assignment. Instead of shooting b...