w Page 5314 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Rarely Are Pillow Fights Won So Decisively
We imagine that this is what the ancient Roman gladitorial games must have been like, if they fought with pillows, and one of the combatants was an incredible wuss. "Think that's the worst of it? Release the kitten!"...

That Tim Hardaway Memorabilia Is Going Fast
We've been browsing around for reaction to the Tim Hardaway comments from Wednesday, and the first thing that struck us is the absence of same from a lot of the NBA blogs. We're not sure why. A few, however, are speaking out. Here's a sample....

Cultural Oddsmaker: How Will Tim Hardaway Impact the NBA All-Star Game?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

Joumana Kidd Goes Nuclear On Jason
So, you know how the whole New Jersey Nets brass was concerned about how ugly the Jason Kidd-Joumana Kidd divorce proceedings might get? Well, The Smoking Gun has Joumana's countersuit to Jason's suit against her, and, holy cow, this thing really escalated fast. It's a huge document, so we're just g...

What Set Tim Hardaway Off
Yesterday, "Jim Rome Is Burning" showed the famous clip of Tim Hardaway throwing a television monitor onto the court. Our special investigative skills of video editing have uncovered why drew his ire. We should have all seen this coming back then....

Champaign's Long National Nightmare Is Over
As an old lifer at the Daily Illini, no story was less fun to talk about than Chief Illiniwek. We once had our own personal take on the embattled "symbol" of the University of Illinois, but we don't even remember what it was anymore: It was talked about every day, in the most banal and "emotional" t...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you relax with an ice chest full of beer while wearing an astronaut diaper ... • College basketball: Providence at Notre Dame [ESPN]; Massachusetts at Fordham. Shall Rose Hill Gym not be rocked tonight? [ESPN2] • College basketball: UCLA at Arizona State; Oregon State at Stanford. I...

Tim Hardaway, The ESPN Angle
With all the fun we're having Tim Hardaway today, a reader writes in and blames ESPN for the whole thing:...

If You Want Soriano, You Have To Deal With This
We don't like to think of ourselves as stuffy traditionalists ... but this, friends, just makes us sad....

Who's Sorry Now? Naked Hi-Jinx Edition
Simply put, we can think of no more embarrassing yet hilarious opening line to a letter than this:...

David Wright Needs Your Help In Choosing A New Theme So
In case you haven't heard, David Wright is retiring his theme music: the Beastie Boys' Brass Monkey, which blared over the Shea Stadium loudspeakers each time he stepped to the plate last season. According to New York Mets Blog, Wright is looking for a new tune, and he needs your help. The Mets' sea...

Tim Hardaway's Deeper Hole
OK, so here's what we want to happen today: Every half hour, we want someone to call Tim Hardaway to ask him about his comments about hating gay people. You can ask him the same question every time, every half hour. It'll be great, because he'll find a way to dig himself an even deeper hole each tim...

Tim Hardaway Wants Only Straight Men To See His Penis
So, by now, everyone has heard former NBA point guard Tim Hardaway's comments on the Dan LeBatard show yesterday, but just in case you're up for some caveman rhetoric — he'll have the roast duck with the mango salsa — here's the full audio of the interview....

What You See After You Hang Out With The Gonzaga Basketball Team
From the Things We Don't Understand file, we end your day with this entirely random video that features Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo and "Saved By The Bell"'s Mr. Belding playing Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" with "metal" "band" Metal Skool....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you find out that you can FINALLY enlist ... • College basketball: Ohio State at Penn State; Duke at Boston College. Eagles can drive a stake through the heart once and for all. [ESPN] • College basketball: Maryland at N.C. State [ESPN2]; Utah at Air Force. Big fun in the Mountain W...

Trying To Understand The Illini Car Crash
Now that Illini center Brian Carlwell's condition after Monday's accident in a car driven by teammate Jamar Smith has been upgraded to "fair," we think it's probably OK to look at some of the more bizarre aspects to the crash....

Hey, How Come All We Got Was A Team Ghana Keychain?
German hospitals are reporting a huge upsurge in maternity reservations for the month of April, which happens to be nine months after the 2006 World Cup was hosted in that country. Give us a minute while we figure out what's going on....

Wrapping Up The Westminster Dog Show
The Westminster Dog Show at Madison Square Garden features the finest athletic specimens at MSG since ... well, since the last Dog Show. We don't consider competitive dog preening a sport, but we do find it funny, and we think Best In Show is one of the funniest movies ever made....

Charlie Weis Hates Internal Bleeding Much More Than He Hates Donuts
In case you've fallen behind on your coverage of failed gastric bypass surgery involving major college football coaches, Notre Dame head whale Charlie Weis is in Day One of his negligence trial in which doctors ignored internal bleeding warning signs. Weis underwent the surgery in 2002 because he wa...

Oprah, Thome And The Self-Cleaning Oven
It's pretty rare that the epic comedic trilogy of Oprah Winfrey, douching and White Sox slugger Jim Thome unite for a good ole middle-aged Midwesterner gigglefest ... but today is that day....