war Page 102 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Why Didn't The Rockets Use Their Mid-Level Exception On Luc Mbah A Moute?
Luc Mbah a Moute is leaving the Rockets. And, to use one of the more cursed sentences in the English language, he’s going to be a Clipper. The former Houston forward signed an artificially deflated one-year, $4.3 million contract with the L.A. team that doesn’t have LeBron, in a deal that the Rocket...
Oh Come On, The Lakers Passed On DeMarcus Cousins?
It’s undeniably wack that the Warriors, with the signing of DeMarcus Cousins to a one-year, $5.3 million deal on Monday night, have managed to assemble an entire starting five that, when healthy, could run the Eastern Conference All-Stars off the court. But what makes the earthquake of the Cousins s...
Yes, Surely Dwight Howard Is Just The Man To Solve The Wizards' Crippling Chemistry Issues
Why did the Wizards fade down the stretch last season and finish 10-15 after the All-Star break on their way to another first-round exit? Part of it was an injury to John Wall, part of it was their questionable depth, but an important reason was that they loathed each other. Exhibit A: Marcin Gortat...
This Is Wack
Maybe your first thought was of the insanely overpowered Boogie-Draymond-Durant-Klay-Steph lineup the Golden State Warriors now can assemble, and of what never-before-seen levels of basketball excellence that group could unlock together. Mine was. But neither of us will ever see that....
The Fight For Peace Has Never Been Easy
This piece is part of a recurring series that aims to be a complete guide to the laws of war. You can read previous entries here....
DeMarcus Cousins Says He Had No Other Offers
The one thing everyone wants to know when an NBA free agent lands at an unexpected destination for a bargain price is simple: They want to know how the hell it happened....
Dear God, DeMarcus Cousins Is Signing With The Warriors
If any Warriors fans were the least bit scared of a LeBron-led Lakers squad, they probably don’t have to be anymore. Multiple outlets are reporting that New Orleans Pelicans beast DeMarcus Cousins is heading to Golden State, signing a contract for considerably less money than he’s worth (despite his...
Klay Thompson Gets Owned In China, This Time By A Sharpshooting Little Girl
Klay Thompson is once again doing a tour of China, the country where he seems to get sapped of all his basketball-playing ability. While he hasn’t appeared to have humiliated himself dunking, after his very sad attempt last year, this time Thompson got owned at his chosen speciality—shooting....
This One's For You, George Stephanopoulos<em></em>
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What Are The Laws Of War, And Why Do They Matter?
There are laws in war....
Let's Speculate Idly About The NBA Draft
The NBA Draft: When is it? What is it? Will you, personally, be selected in this draft? Look, man: I don’t know this shit and honestly I don’t appreciate being asked. That said, the NBA Draft is 1) happening on Thursday evening, 2) effectively random and reliably entertaining, and 3) unless your win...
Very Chill Rockets Fans Are Already Leaving One-Star Reviews For Ayesha Curry's New Restaurant<em></em>
Celebrity chef Ayesha Curry, wife of the Golden State Warriors’ Steph, is opening a second location in Houston this July for her and Michael Mina’s BBQ restaurant International Smoke. For Curry, the new location must represent a good opportunity to expand her business. But if you’re a Rockets fan st...
Nick Young Was Just Joshing When He Said Everybody Should Do Cocaine
As a shoot-first, think-second gunner off the Warriors’ bench, Nick Young is already the closest thing the NBA has to a human line of cocaine. But when Swaggy P calls for the legalization of coke on a TMZ camera while leaving the club on a Tuesday night, he wants y’all to know he’s just kidding....
Dwight Howard Reaches Sad, Strange New Stage Of His Career
Here we are, again: Dwight Howard is switching teams for the fourth straight offseason. After failing to live up to expectations as a franchise cornerstone with the Rockets, flopping as a hometown hero with the Hawks, and failing to make an impact as a veteran leader with the Hornets (lol), Howard h...
Let’s Remember Some Guys: Pro Wrestling Edition
My uncle introduced me to pro wrestling. I think I was seven. He clued me in on the gag right away: Guys pretended to fight, and it was hilarious....
NBA Auctions Off What J.R. Smith Wore When He Lost What Was Left Of His Dignity
A token of J.R. Smith’s eternal shame is up for sale on the NBA’s auction site. “He played 38 minutes and registered 10 points with 2 assists and 6 rebounds,” reads the very charitable caption. In some sense, this is the greatest piece of LeBron James memorabilia that money could buy....
Beer For Herbs Calls Itself "Lebron Tears"
An undeniable spoil of victory is the unassailable right to talk mad shit about your vanquished foes, forever, no matter their prominence nor how splendidly they performed. The Warriors are very good at this, as in the case of Draymond Green using t-shirts to mock LeBron James after each of the last...
Dwight Howard Shares Story Of Stan Van Gundy Owning The Hell Out Of Marcin Gortat
Marcin Gortat is a fine NBA player. He’s been one of the NBA’s best screeners for about a decade; before a relatively recent age-related decline in athleticism he was an underrated defender and rim protector; he’s a wizard at timing his movement towards the hoop to preserve and maximize the narrow p...
It Seems Like Draymond Green Truly Dislikes Tristan Thompson
It is not uncommon to see two NBA players who just spent a game or even an entire series scrapping and talking wild shit to each other suddenly shaking hands and hugging once the buzzer goes off. It’s a particular quirk of the NBA, a league in which guys can say truly vile things during the game and...
Jordan Bell Might Be The Drunkest Golden State Warrior
In the immediate aftermath of Game 4, Warriors rookie Jordan Bell wielded two bottles of celebratory champagne. These were the results:...