war Page 195 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jared Allen Told Ray Edwards, "I'm Going To Punch You Square In Your Wiener, Dude" Before Punching Him Square In The Wiener
Maybe you've seen the video circulating this week that shows Minnesota's Jared Allen punching Atlanta's Ray Edwards directly in the crotch during the Falcons' 24-14 win in Week 12. If not, here it is, and here's Allen's frank explanation of the incident from today's episode of PFT Live:...

Orlando Magic CEO Steps Down, Allegedly After A Late Night Drunk Dial To Dwight Howard
Dwight. Dwight, are you awake? Pick up, man. Dwight, man, I shouldn't be calling you. My buddy says it's too late to be calling anyone, but I just had to tell you. I..love you, Dwight. You're one of my best friends. You know that? I never told anyone that, but you are like the greatest guy....

ShortCenter: Coming To You Live From The Los Angeles Lakers' Dreamscape
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

David Lee Watched Phil Hellmuth Play Poker Into The Wee Hours Last Night
Tipster Calvin writes in, frankly:...

"Mele Kalikimaka!" BYU-Hawai'i Game Delayed By A Bad Santa
This clip's as funny for the commentary provided by ESPN2's Carter Blackburn & Brock Huard as it is the visual of a man in full Santa Claus getup "streaking" in the third quarter of the BYU-Hawai'i game at Aloha Stadium tonight. (They like doing this sort of thing there, as you might remember from...

ShortCenter: Herm Edwards's Bizarre Eulogy For The Eagles
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

ESPN Keeps Trying To Pretend It Cared About The Bernie Fine Molestation Allegations All Along
ESPN's Mark Schwarz, the reporter who spent eight years not reporting the story that a Syracuse ballboy had accused assistant coach Bernie Fine of molesting him, has now taken his own turn in the spotlight on the ESPN Rationalization Tour by talking to Sports Illustrated's Richard Deitsch. As Deitsc...

This Portrait Of Atlanta Falcon Ray Edwards And LaStarya Thompson Better Be Called "Handful Of Ass"
Tipster Mike S. was kind enough to ferret out this glorious piece of artwork on artist Gabe Richesson's website. In proper form, the Edwards/LaStarya study is five-feet wide and four-feet tall. In proper form, it owns the room, as if a vice squeezing your attention tight and showing it who's boss....

Tyler Palko Is Not The Next Kurt Warner
During Monday Night Football last week, Ron Jaworski briefly speculated that Tyler Palko was following the Kurt Warner archetype, of a guy who bumbles around for a while before finally getting his shot in the NFL. As Jaws pointed out, Kurt Warner didn't get his first NFL start until he was 28 year...

And Then Al Michaels Said To Howard Cosell: "You're Drunk. You're Ruining The Fucking Telecast."
Howard Cosell, who died in 1995, ruled sports broadcasting from the 1960s until the 1980s. He commentated on Monday Night Football from its inception, called boxing's biggest fights, and popped up on Olympics and baseball telecasts, too. In his new book, Howard Cosell: The Man, the Myth, and the Tra...

Jon Stewart On The Costas-Sandusky Interview: "The Only Time You Repeat A Question Is When You're Guilty!"
The train wreck of an interview gets the Daily Show treatment: "By the way, in case you're wondering, 'Where the hell is Sandusky's lawyer while he's saying all this?' He's sitting right next to Bob Costas!" [Watch on Quickish]...

Louisville Players Weren't Prepared For Pitt Because They Were Busy With The New <i>Call Of Duty</i> Game
So, this is the thing: Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 is awesome, and everyone rushed out to buy it when it came out on Tuesday. The NCAA probably should have just canceled all games for this weekend, because crucial Big East showdowns feel a lot less crucial when the Russians are invading Lower Man...

ShortCenter: Herm Edwards's Monday Morning Aneurysm
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Penn State AD Tim Curley Will No Longer Receive Award For Nation's Top College Athletics Administrator
Penn State athletic director Tim Curley—currently on an administrative leave as the investigation into Jerry Sandusky's alleged child abuse continues—was awarded with the nation's top honor for a college athletics administrator back in June. The National Football Foundation (NFF), which administers ...

Gamblers Beat Delaware With Math
Why you gots to pick on Delaware, bettors? Delaware never hurt no one. They were the first state. They don't charge income sales tax. It only takes like 20 minutes to drive through on your way to more important places. And now you're all gaming the system to bet NFL games, even though you're not tec...

How A Comedian Helped Birth The "F-You" Patriots
Back in September 2007, the Patriots were caught taping the Jets' defensive signals on the sideline. This was week one, after the Patriots beat the Jets, 38-14. The next 15 games—all of which the Patriots won—were blowouts a lot like that, but with a venomous edge. In his new book, War Room, which h...

The Stupid Moral Panic Over Mocking Tim Tebow; Or, What Would Jesus Do About Tebowing?
Oh, please. You know why Tebow memes exist? You know why they've, let us say, gone forth and multiplied? Because of columns like this, that's why. Here's the headline:...

Appeals Court Finally Tosses Fine Against CBS For Janet Jackson's 2004 Wardrobe Malfunction
Writes the New York Times: "A federal appeals court on Wednesday again threw out a $550,000 fine against CBS by the Federal Communications Commission for Janet Jackson's famed "wardrobe malfunction" during the 2004 Super Bowl halftime show."...

The Last Act Of The Notorious Howie Spira
Howard Spira appeared in the Gawker offices one summer day as if summoned from the beyond, which in some sense he had been. He just stood there, anxiously clutching a black plastic bag, his enormous green eyes sweeping the room. His skin had the hue of a life spent mostly indoors and in poor health....