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Bryce Harper Shows Off His Arm Cannon, Gets Screwed By Umpire
Recreational softball phenom Bryce Harper is making quite the impression on the DC fan base during his debut fortnight in The Show. (They're not really going to send him back down to AAA, are they?) First, it was making good with the locals during a softball game on the Mall, and in lieu of raking a...

Bryce Harper Played Softball Near The Washington Monument On His Day Off
Longtime Yankees fan Bryce Harper will soon be the king of Washington, DC, but he's up for a cup of coffee with the Nats while star third baseman Ryan Zimmerman sits on the DL. So, to get acclimated to his eventual home city, Harper decided to take in some of the local color today by crashing a lo...

Bryce Harper Has His First Major League Hit, Possibly Because Dodgers Fans Were Mooning Their Own Pitcher
Nationals rookie Bryce Harper doubled in his third MLB at-bat, giving him his first hit in the majors. More importantly, though, it happened as some fans behind home plate had their bare asses out and pointing toward the mound. Why? I don't know. Does it matter? No. [PRIME]...

Bryce Harper's First Major League At-Bat Was A Comebacker
He's clearly doomed to failure....

Joel Ward Doesn't Blame Boston For Racist Comments
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Nobody should be blaming an entire city or fanbase....

And Here's The Long-Awaited Unveiling Of Robert Griffin III's Socks
"Go catch your dreams," says RG3, though to his receivers "your dreams" means "my passes."(Click "Expand" for a closer look.)...

Here's How Racists On Twitter Reacted to Joel Ward's Series-Winning Goal Against Boston
Joel Ward is a light-scoring winger for the Capitals, who was in the right place and the right time to put home the overtime series-winner to send Washington past Boston in game 7. Completely unrelated, for most of us, is that Ward's parents were Barbadian immigrants to Toronto. So there were a good...

Chien-Ming Wang Holds Press Conference To Apologize For Cheating On Wife
In 2009, Chien-Ming Wang had received shoulder surgery that would keep him out of baseball for two years, and had just lost his contract with the Yankees. So he did what any one of us would do—he went to the bar a lot, and chatted up the cute bartender....

Umpire Greg Gibson Took A Stephen Strasburg Fastball To The Crotch
Ump Greg Gibson, behind the plate for today's Nats-Marlins matchup, was in a Very Bad Place today when Wilson Ramos mishandled a Stephen Strasburg fastball and deflected it right into Gibson's groin area. Gibson bounced back rather quickly—most MLB umps wear cups when working the plate, after all...

A Frozen Clock Was Nearly Disastrous In The Caps-Bruins Game
With 9.5 seconds left and the Capitals up by a goal, the puck was dropped in Washington's zone. But for more than five seconds, the clock refused to start. The Bruins cycled it around, with Patrice Bergeron getting off a shot just at the buzzer. It was thankfully blocked, because a score there wou...

Oh Look, Robert Griffin III Has "Character Issues"
The NFL draft is a week away, so it's just about time to start flinging around unfounded speculation and backstabbing and deliberate misinformation, and that's all before Mel Kiper takes to the airwaves. Which young man shall we tear down today? Curiously, it's Robert Griffin III, the second overall...

Jabar Gaffney Thinks The Redskins Want To Trade Him Because Of His Twitter Rant
Gaffney said as much to a radio station this morning, though it's "likely, but not absolutely certain" he could be even be released, a league source also told ESPN 980. Yes, Gaffney was referring to the same Twitter rant he says he wasn't responsible for because he got hacked....

Davey Johnson Is Perplexed And Unmoved By Press Conference Fire Alarm
Okay, let's get this out of the way first. Yes, it's hilarious to hear Nats manager Davey Johnson say, completely out of context, "It was shockingly beautiful, and big. I'm looking at it and I'm thinking, jeez. My first one was in 1966." He's talking about Edwin Jackson's World Series ring. Not a pe...

Karl Alzner Calls Milan Lucic A Crybaby. Lucic's Teammate Says He Was "An Angry Baby."
Milan Lucic hasn't made much of an impact on the scoresheet, but he's been in the middle of every physical altercation in a physical series in a physical playoffs overall. Lucic picked up three roughing penalties on the night in a 4-3 Bruins win, and on the last ended up in a Karl Alzner headlock....

Rick Ankiel Threw A Strike From Center Field
Houston's Jordan Schafer had 22 stolen bases last year, so he's not slow. But even he wasn't about to tag up and test the arm of Rick Ankiel, who showed the Astros' prudence to be warranted by hitting the catcher on the fly. Perhaps it wasn't strictly a strike (unless Larry Vanover was working the p...

The NHL Had A Good Day Yesterday
The Stanley Cup Playoffs, like the NBA playoffs, drag on for what feels like an eternity-spanning April, May and June. If every day shakes out the way yesterday did, however, then it might be worth it. Four games were played and three went to overtime. Four series had the chance to go 2-0 and all f...
![Jabar Gaffney Is Having A Twitter Meltdown Over His Soon-To-Be Ex-Wife And A Former Teammate Who's Also His Cousin [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17jdx4lnn3e94jpg.jpg)
Jabar Gaffney Is Having A Twitter Meltdown Over His Soon-To-Be Ex-Wife And A Former Teammate Who's Also His Cousin [UPDATE]
We're not really sure what to make of what's been happening recently with the Twitter account of Redskins receiver Jabar Gaffney. So far as we can tell, Gaffney is none too happy with both free agent cornerback Lito Sheppard and his own wife, though it's not clear if one beef has anything to do with...

Remember When Gilbert Arenas And Javaris Crittenton Threatened To Shoot Each Other? JaVale McGee Started It.
Was it really more than two years ago that the Wizards locker room melted down in an orgy of simulated gunplay over a boo-ray debt? It was, and one of the principals—Gilbert Arenas, who allegedly brought four guns to the locker room and laid them out for Javaris Crittenton to choose—is finally shedd...

Gilbert Arenas (Sort Of) Sets The Record Straight On Shoe-Pooping
USA Today has a story today on Gilbert Arenas, who seems to be enjoying the quiet calm and relative anonymity of being a role player earning the veteran's minimum with the Memphis Grizzlies (that the Magic still have to pay him $60 million probably helps)....

Science! Simulates The Kentucky Wildcats Vs. The Washington Wizards
Paul Bessire runs PredictionMachine.com and created the Predictalator, the most advanced sports forecasting software available today. The technology has the ability to account for all of the statistical interactions of the players, coaches, officials, and fans (homefield advantage) in each game. The...