washington Page 109 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Baseball Game Interrupted By Man In Wedding Dress
Play was stopped at the Nationals-Braves game in Atlanta on Saturday evening so that police officers could take down a streaking fan in a wedding dress. This captivated the crowd and beguiled Davey Johnson....

The First Casualty Of Dan Snyder's Dumbass Libel Suit Might Be Dan Snyder's Dumbass Lawyer
Failed journalist and wretched lawyer Dave Donovan announced today that he's leaving his job as Chief Operating Officer of the Redskins to return to the law firm whence he came (and where, ostensibly, lawyers can actually convince clients not to file dumbass lawsuits). Donovan attributes his decisio...

Erotica Failed To Get Michael Morse Into The All-Star Game
Your morning roundup for July 8, the day Carl Monday struck fear into the hearts of the Steroid Cartels. Photo via tipster Kal....

There's A New Shawn Kemp In Town, Seattle
Shawn Kemp, Jr. (not pictured), a 6'9" center from Canton, Georgia has signed with the Washington Huskies and has already started classes at the university. It's not the Sonics, but it is a Kemp. [ESPN]...

The NBA Draft: Where Love Happens?
Jan Vesely, a 6-11 swingman from the Czech Republic, was selected sixth overall by the Washington Wizards in last night's NBA Draft. For any 21-year-old, the moment would have been special. You're on national television in a brand new suit, and you're about to become a millionaire. But Vesely and ...

Jim Riggleman Partied Away His Sorrows Last Night
There are very good arguments to be made on both sides of Jim Riggleman's stunning resignation from the Nationals yesterday. You could say that he's earned a contract extension, and you'd be right. You could say that he signed a contract and he should honor it, and you'd be right....

Crude Dick Joke, Or Another Nationals Typo?
Your morning roundup for June 22, the day we implored you to stand with the seals. Image via tipster BP (not me)....

Here's Video Of John Wall's Failed Attempt To Throw A Baseball More Than 30 Feet
When the Washington Nationals called on Wizards guard John Wall to throw out the ceremonial first pitch of yesterday's interleague game against the Baltimore Orioles, it was a decent nod to everybody within the same NBA market. When Wall threw the ball, though, it was an affront to physics and the...

Will Daniel Snyder's Lawsuit Be Dismissed As A Nuisance?
Washington City Paper reports that it filed papers today asking the D.C. Superior Court to dismiss the lawsuit filed by Washington NFL owner Daniel Snyder over Dave McKenna's Cranky Redskin Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder. The paper is arguing that Snyder's suit violates Washington, D.C.'s anti-SLAPP law:...

Nationals Unveil "Iconic, Defining Element," A Hamburger You Can Get At The Mets Game
Nationals Park is clean, cozy, semi-convenient, and all-around quite serviceable as a major league ballpark. But nothing there grabs you like PNC Park's view, or AT&T Park's bay, or Minute Maid Park's stupid hill. Nationals Park is a forgettable place to watch a forgettable team. But not any more! (...

Alex Ovechkin's Summer Diet: Hookah, Beers, And Fried Steak
There's nothing illegal or even wrong with what Ovechkin's doing here—nonetheless, one must wonder how perhaps the best athlete in the NHL stays in shape doing this....

Redskins Force Kenny Chesney Upon Season Ticket Holders
A few months ago, the Redskins marketing department began the annual, Sisyphean task of convincing people to pay money to watch their team play football eight times. Realizing that this would be a tough sell, especially to those it had tricked before, it threw in a perk: people who renewed their pla...

Dan Snyder's Latest Media Blitz Makes Everyone Look Like A Simpering Ass
Dan Snyder doesn't do many interviews. The reason: When Dan Snyder opens his mouth, he embarrasses himself. The Redskins owner appears comfortable only when speaking in sound bites about how his blood runs "burgundy and gold." So it came as a surprise last week when Snyder sat down with the DC aff...

Dan Snyder Subpoenas Washington Post Blogger For Linking To Washington City Paper Story
Oops, we almost forgot to post our daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be linking to until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit takes a Ceti Eel in the ear....

Phillies Fans Find New Way To Embarrass Nationals In Their Own Park
As if the usual horde of Philadelphians and assorted bandwagoners outnumbering the Nats fans in DC weren't enough, they found a way to impose themselves on the action. After Danny Espinosa's home run in the fifth landed in a section of Phillies fans, one chucked the ball back on to the field as if...

Former Cavalier/Wizard Larry Hughes May Have Pumped Your Gas Yesterday
And no, it's not because he shot .355 from the field in the '09-'10 season, during which he was dumped by the Knicks, Kings, and Bobcats. He made $84 million in his career, silly!...

FC Barcelona Proved They Were The Best Team In All Of Professional Sports Yesterday
Your morning roundup for May 29, the day Roger Ebert inexplicably gave two thumbs down to those who blatantly allowed two eyes to check out two foreign boobs....

We Are All Dave McKenna CXI
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit runs out of ways to die in this space....

Today, The Rangers Gave Ron Washington A Shitty Cadillac For A Not Shitty Reason
"Sugar" Ron Washington, everybody's favorite AL West manager, received the keys to a Cadillac at home plate today. Only it wasn't one of those shiny new Cadillacs that one might receive for managing a team to an AL pennant. The Dallas Observer explains:...

Satirical, Non-Libelous Dan Snyder Group Fiction, Part IV: Cooke And Bligle Jim Escape To The Potomac
Here's your daily link to Dave McKenna's brilliant "Cranky Redskins Fan's Guide to Dan Snyder," which we'll be posting until Dan Snyder's dumbass libel suit chokes on a crab puff at a cocktail party. (For those of you keeping track, this is "We Are All Dave McKenna CX.")...