washington Page 127 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Nationals Even Lose To Fireworks
Nationals Park sucks — we know that — so the franchise rewards those 200 people who shell out to watch another loss with fireworks. Nice gesture, until the Nationals, as always, managed to screw it up....

Why Your Stadium Sucks: Nationals Park
This is a new weekly feature in which I (and maybe you, too, readers) detail the various reasons for hating your ballpark. This week: Nationals Park...

Make Some Space On Your CBS Sports Fantasy Teams
Stephen Strasburg wasn't one of The Chosen Ones, but he is otherworldy enough to be one of Washington's starting pitchers before the MLB Draft. In all fairness, CBS' geeksquad was probably just prepping for summer vacation. [CBS Sports]...

Jim Bowden’s (Extremely Brief) Return To Respectability
Jim Bowden, the disgraced ex-Nationals GM, stands accused of stealing ballplayers' bonus money. The team he built is on pace to lose 118 games. Naturally, ESPN wanted to hire him....

The Nationals Are A Memorial To Failure
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Beware The Flying Sausage Casings At Nat's Games
The Nationals are having a helluva year. Misspelled uniforms. Misspelled bats. They suck. Now sausage-shooting meltdowns: "They were very clearly exploding as they were shot out, and we could easily see the bun and foil that were laying on the warning track." [WaPo]...

The Nationals Are Content With Losing As Many Games As Possible This Season, Thank You
Stephen Strasburg, this year's can't-miss baseball prospect, has started 13 games at San Diego State and he's won 12 of them....

No, I Meant The <i>Other</i> Game Sevens
Geez, that was a bit of a let down. After a fantastically competitive six game series, the Capitals laid a big fat egg in Game 7 and the Penguins are moving on....

Penguins Superfan Will Make You Question Your Commitment To Game 7
Sure, you worked two jobs to save enough money to get that customized alternate road jersey—but this guy spends three times that on rival teams' sweaters....just so he can goof on them....

Wherein We Jinx Ryan Zimmerman
The Z-Man's hit streak is at 30, the longest by a third baseman since 1980. Let's hope it keeps going because it's the only reason anyone would go see the Nationals this year. [National Journal]...

You Should Really Be Watching The NHL Playoffs
Last week, I was worried that the Washington/Pittsburgh series might end in a disappointing sweep, but not only is it still going, it's gotten more exciting. (And the other series aren't bad either.)...

Top Draft Prospect About To Get Paid
Top draft prospect Stephen Strasburg pitched a 17 K, no hitter in his last home game at San Diego State. Expect the Nationals to draft him before getting anally raped by his agent, Scott Boras....

Albert Haynesworth Sued, But No Hard Feelings
The man injured in a car accident involving Albert Haynesworth is suing the Titans lineman for $7.5 million. "He's the man, but I'm still not mad. I don't have anything against him." [Tennessean]...

Alex and Sid's Dueling Hat Tricks
The NHL got what it wanted—a Crosby/Ovechkin playoff showdown—and the first two games have lived up to the billing. If only they can find a way to make it last longer than two more games....

Sports Feuds Used To Be Much More Macho Than This
Four of the most-loathed things in America (Missouri Tigers, Washington Redskins, sports radio, and Twitter) converge for an epic battle of (t)wits. Susskind and Hawking got nothing on Daniel and Dukes. [NBC Washington]...

Pens Fans Attempt to Distract Capitals With Funny Faces
The Penguins have evened the score with the Capitals at 2-2 in after two periods of play in Washington. In other news, this Pittsburgh fan seems to be quite taken with Washington's coach Bruce Boudreau....

The Legendary Redskins Ticket "Waiting List" That Doesn't Exist
Dan Snyder likes to brag that the waiting list for Redskins season tickets has over 200,000 names on it. Then why is the team begging people who aren't on the list to buy seats?...

Donald Brashear Suspended Six Games For Breaking Faces
Six! One for pushing Colton Orr and five for a late hit on Blair Betts—so he'll miss Tuesday's Game 7 and most (maybe all?) of the next series if they win....

Rangers Coach Suspended For Fighting Fans
It looks like Sean Avery's hot-headed, loose cannon ways are rubbing off on his head coach John Tortorella, who got himself suspended for today's crucial Game 6 (on national TV!) against the Capitals....