washington Page 19 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Heartbreaking: Dan Snyder Won't Buy This Man A Spoon
In what is absolutely not a metaphor for Jay Gruden’s coaching and [gestures vaguely at Washington’s routine ascendance to new frontiers of dysfunction], the Monday Night Football broadcast caught a team employee on Washington’s sideline stirring a cooler full of Gatorade with what appears to be a p...
Of Course The Skins Misspelled London Fletcher's Name During His Ring Of Honor Ceremony
Dan Snyder’s football clown show spent halftime of their Monday night meltdown loss inducting retired linebacker London Fletcher into the Ring of Honor of their miserable, far-flung hell-hole of a stadium. Fletcher spent less than half of his career in Washington and won zero playoff games, but wha...
You Will Never Unsee Morgan Moses's Hasty Right Leg
I do not advise tuning in for the Monday night matchup between Washington and the Bears for any reason. Those deranged enough to watch this horror show have seen the Bears pound the bejeezus out of the home team in every phase, starting with a first-quarter pick-six to open the scoring. The especia...
UCLA Scored 50 Points In 20 Minutes For A Psychedelic Comeback Against Washington State
Only the true East Coast degenerates—not even myself, if we’re coming clean—would have had the guts and belief to stick with UCLA’s game at Washington State after 1 a.m. Sunday morning, when the No. 19 ranked Cougars went up 49-17 on the winless Bruins midway through the third quarter. But those who...
PR Genius Tony Wyllie Takes His Talents Away From Dan Snyder
Sports radio station WJFK in D.C. reported today that Tony Wyllie has quit as Dan Snyder’s communications director to take a job with the Special Olympics. If any good PR came Snyder’s way during Wyllie’s nine-year run with Washington’s NFL team, it doesn’t come to mind. As for the gaffes on Wyllie’...
There's Nothing More Predictable Than Mike Leach Suddenly Having Dumb Thoughts About Homeless People
College football coaches tend to be graded on a steep and extremely generous curve when it comes to their personalities. How well they do or don’t do their jobs is easy enough to assess, because it creates a binary win/loss record that reflects the sum of the players they recruit and the assistants ...
Washington's Running Back Conflict Resolves Itself In Characteristically Grim, Destructive Fashion
Washington running back Derrius Guice missed his entire rookie season after suffering a knee injury during his first career preseason game. This year, Guice injured his other knee in his first career regular season game, and is expected to miss only half the year. If he keeps this pattern up, the th...
Jay Gruden's Players Are Pissed After He Inexplicably Made Adrian Peterson A Healthy Scratch
Washington head coach Jay Gruden opted not to use Adrian Peterson at all in Sunday’s loss to the Eagles, despite the running back being healthy and ready to go. Gruden instead fielded Derrius Guice and Chris Thompson, who rushed a combined 13 times for 28 yards, and Wendell Smallwood, who didn’t hav...
Vernon Davis Hurdles Defender, Burns Eagles For 48-Yard Touchdown, Walks Off In Pain
With Jordan Reed inactive, Washington started Vernon Davis at tight end today against the Eagles. It paid off early with this spectacular 48-yard touchdown, but that might’ve used up all the remaining gas in the 35-year-old’s tank....
Mets Ninth-Inning Bullpen Implosion Special Even By Mets Standards
My God, the Mets. Phew. The hell they entered Tuesday night is a special, Mets-only hell. There are excruciating losses, and then there’s watching in horror as a sure-fire victory leaps out of the bag and lays waste to the dwindling hopes of your fading season. ...
Dan Snyder Actually Good At Owning An NFL Team, Says Direct Competitor, Presumably While Snickering
The upcoming NFL season will be the 20th since Dan Snyder purchased the Washington Redskins from the estate of Jack Kent Cooke in May of 1999. To mark the anniversary, the Washington Post has a state-of-the-franchise story up today, sort of a report card for Snyder’s first two cartoonishly dysfuncti...
<i>College Gameday</i> Hedged Maurice Washington's Child Porn Charges As "Some Legal Issues"
ESPN’s College Gameday took a brief step away from pregame analysis of Nebraska-South Alabama to mention what’s been happening with Cornhuskers running back Maurice Washington. The sophomore is currently facing a felony child pornography charge for sending a video from 2016 of his then-15-year-old e...
The Legendary Public Rec Center In A Private School's Pocket
Every now and then comes a reminder that The System works precisely as everybody suspects it does and wishes it didn’t. The situation now roiling the youth sports scene in the Nation’s Capital is one of those. The D.C. government recently agreed to let the Maret School, one of the more elite private...
No Matter How Good You Are, The Washington Mystics Will Be Better
The Los Angeles Sparks, to be sure, are no scrubs. They’re sitting near the top of the WNBA standings, with a future Hall of Famer in Candace Parker, All-Star forwards in the Ogwumike sisters, and one of the league’s greatest perimeter threats in Chelsea Gray. Alas, none of it was enough to prevent ...
IIHF Bans Evgeny Kuznetsov For Four Years After Positive Cocaine Test
The International Ice Hockey Federation announced today that Washington Capitals center Evgeny Kuznetsov will be suspended from international hockey for four years after testing positive for cocaine in late May. The statement says:...
Baseball Maniac Hunter Strickland Broke His Nose With A Barbell To The Face
Last time we checked in on Nationals pitcher Hunter Strickland, he was sending himself to the injured list for two months after punching a wall. While not as self-evidently stupid, his most recent injury is just as bizarre: in the run-up to Tuesday’s game against the Pirates, Strickland got hit in t...
That Is Not Markelle Fultz Or His Mom
During the third quarter of Sunday’s Indiana Fever-Washington Mystics game, the broadcast thought it had spotted a celebrity in the front row: Orlando Magic guard Markelle Fultz, who was identified alongside his mom. Great! Only it wasn’t Markelle Fultz....
Surly Baseball Fan Jack White Returned To Watch Nationals-Brewers In Extra Innings After Leaving To Play A Concert
Jack White is currently on tour with his band The Raconteurs and their show on Saturday was in our nation’s capital. As he is wont to do, White went over to Nationals Park with his bandmates to catch the early portion of Brewers-Nats, but had to leave as the time for his concert approached. The show...
The Skins Have The Amazing Ability To Complicate And Worsen Any Injury To Their Players
Colt McCoy was the presumptive favorite to earn the not-especially-coveted starting quarterback job in Washington during training camp. That race appears to be up in the air today, after head coach Jay Gruden announced Wednesday that McCoy will miss Thursday night’s exhibition against the Bengals, w...
Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Washington Redskins
Some people are fans of the Washington Redskins. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Washington Redskins. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....