washington Page 31 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How I Became A Wizard, By Dwight Howard, Age 7
Last year, the Washington Wizards underperformed both out of sheer ingrained habit and because some of the most important people on the team just absolutely fucking hated some of the other most important people on the team. On Monday, the team introduced Dwight Howard, the veteran big man that the t...
Nationals Executive Has To Resort To Crowdfunding For Leukemia Treatment
Doug Harris, the Washington Nationals’ assistant GM and vice president of player personnel, holds a significant position in the organization—and yet, even an MLB team executive has to resort to asking the public to help cover his medical costs....
Stephen Strasburg's Return Brings More Misery For The Sorry Nationals
Stephen Strasburg pitched for the Nationals for the first time since June 8 Friday. His return to the rotation after recovering from shoulder inflammation was hailed as a major reason for hope that a gloomy, disappointing Nationals season might turn around in the second half. Then he went out and pi...
The Ethics Watchdog Going After Jim Jordan Helped Kill The Sex-Abuse Case Against Kevin Johnson<em></em>
Last week, professional ethics arbiter Norman Eisen asked Congress to investigate the Ohio State sex abuse allegations and any role played by Rep. Jim Jordan (R-Ohio), a former NCAA national wrestling champion and longtime assistant coach of the Buckeye wrestling team....
Report: Trump's Supreme Court Nominee Blames Massive Credit Card Debt On Nationals Season Tickets
In a truly troubling sign of poor judgment, Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh says he racked up huge sums of credit card debt purchasing season tickets to watch the chronically disappointing Washington Nationals play baseball in their charmless stadium year after year:...
Former NBA Star Kermit Washington Sentenced To Six Years Over Charity Fraud Scheme
Former NBA player Kermit Washington—who played for 10 seasons but is chiefly famous for punching Rudy Tomjanovich so hard he nearly killed him—was sentenced to six years in federal prison and fined $967,158 yesterday for his role in an “extensive charity fraud scheme,” per a release from the Justice...
Baseball Won't Stop Serving Us Its Gross Fake Beef
We need to get some health inspectors into MLB, because the league just cannot stop serving up all this fake beef. More often than usual this season, it seems like teams are looking for the smallest of faux pas just to have an excuse to rush onto the field and perform some masculinity....
Alex Ovechkin Really, Really Loves The Song "My Neck, My Back"
Stanley Cup winner Alex Ovechkin is wringing as much out of the offseason as he can, presumably so he can drink it while shirtless. The Washington Capitals captain took his championship tour to his hometown of Moscow this past weekend. Ovi attended a viewing party for the national team’s World Cup m...
Mark Reynolds Is ... The Most Interesting Man In Baseball
It’s been a hell of a couple days for Mark Reynolds! A hero in two important breakthrough wins for the Nationals on Friday and Saturday, Reynolds somehow managed to have an even more eventful day at the park on Sunday. To recap: Reynolds turned the first pitch of the bottom of the ninth inning Frida...
The Marlins Were Exactly What The Doctor Ordered For The Slumping Nationals
The Nationals picked a really good time to have their big players-only meeting, Wednesday night, following a sweep at home at the hands of the Boston Red Sox. The Nationals had lost five in a row and 15 of 19, and were outscored by the Red Sox 18-7. Whatever spin certain of their players tried to pu...
Nationals Follow Players-Only Meeting With Largest Comeback Win In Team History
The post-players-only meeting era of Nationals baseball got off to a rough start Thursday evening. The Nationals sent the “violently ill” Jeremy Hellickson to the rubber against the Miami Marlins, and watched as their sallow-faced starter was pounded for seven runs in the first two innings, by the t...
The Nationals Might Be In Some Trouble
The Nationals were heavy NL East favorites, but perhaps by default. They’ve won the division the last two years, and in four of the last six, and the young Braves and Phillies weren’t supposed to be this good, this quickly. But never mind the standings, where Washington is seven games back—the Nats ...
Yes, Surely Dwight Howard Is Just The Man To Solve The Wizards' Crippling Chemistry Issues
Why did the Wizards fade down the stretch last season and finish 10-15 after the All-Star break on their way to another first-round exit? Part of it was an injury to John Wall, part of it was their questionable depth, but an important reason was that they loathed each other. Exhibit A: Marcin Gortat...
Don't Leave Elena Delle Donne This Wide Open<em></em>
The Mystics squashed the Liberty in dramatic fashion on Thursday night, thanks to an Elena Delle Donne buzzer beater. She got the shot off thanks to a brilliantly drawn inbounds play, but also because the Liberty played some atrocious defense that left Delle Donne with an acre of space at the three-...
Sergio Romo Tried To Start Some Shit With The Nationals Over A Stolen Base From Three Weeks Ago
Sergio Romo capped off a shutout win for the Rays over the Nationals this afternoon by striking out Michael Taylor. Rather than quietly saunter back to his dugout, Romo took the opportunity to stunt on Taylor, which stoked the ire of the Nationals. Benches cleared and everyone got to do that basebal...
Tyler Hilinski's Autopsy Shows Former Washington State QB Had CTE
Washington State QB Tyler Hilinski’s family opened up to Sports Illustrated’s Greg Bishop about their son’s death by suicide and how they’ve been coping since. Hilinski was found dead of an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound in January, and according to an autopsy of Hilinski’s brain performed...
Mike Leach Is Extremely Normal
Mike Leach is not mad, but mostly he is not crazy. He’s your average Fox News viewer, mostly, but also famous and rich and the best-paid public employee in the state of Washington....
Strong Teen Juan Soto Smacked The Hell Out Of This Dinger
Juan Soto is 19 years old and has been in the majors for less than a month, and he’s already qualified as a Yankee killer. He followed up last week’s two-homer game in the Bronx by hitting this absolute dong during the resumption of a suspended game today in D.C.: ...
Barry Trotz Is Stepping Down As Capitals Coach
In news that comes as a pretty huge surprise, Washington Capitals head coach Barry Trotz is resigning—not re-signing, but resigning—just 11 days after winning the Stanley Cup. He’s apparently got two pretty good reasons....
![Yes, That Video Of Obama That Mike Leach Tweeted Is Very Fake [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/wu6sbqlw5klx1bvojekn.jpg)
Yes, That Video Of Obama That Mike Leach Tweeted Is Very Fake [Update]
Mike Leach might’ve officially lost it....