we Page 234 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Here's How A Deaf And Blind Brazil Fan Enjoys The World Cup
Friends, sports are good....
Toni Kroos Saves Germany's World Cup With Insane Last-Second Golazo
Germany were perilously close to seeing their chances of making it out of their group dwindle to almost nothing. Tied at 1-1 against Sweden, down to ten men with only seconds remaining in regulation, Germany needed a miracle. Then Toni Kroos did what you see above....
Marcell Ozuna Tried Way Too Hard To Catch This Fly Ball<em></em>
The Brewers whupped the Cardinals tonight, and the Milwaukee scoring got rolling with a two-out, first-inning fly ball from Jesus Aguilar. It was high, and it was deep, but it wasn’t quite as gone as St. Louis left fielder Marcell Ozuna assumed it was. While Ozuna was trying out his best Spider-Man ...
Heroic Bullpen Catcher Rescues Helpless Bats From Ballpark Flood
It rained just a bit in Pittsburgh this evening, forcing the postponement of tonight’s Brewers-Pirates game. But before Milwaukee bullpen catcher Marcus Hanel returned to the safety of his hotel room, he made the courageous, selfless decision to rescue some powerless equipment from the terrifying fl...
Cubs Reliever Brandon Morrow Says He Hurt Himself While Taking Off His Pants
The Cubs didn’t use closer Brandon Morrow in either of their games Tuesday against the Dodgers, instead relying on a bevy of other relievers. He would’ve been really helpful in the first game, which the Cubs lost 4-3 after Justin Wilson blew a 3-2 lead in the ninth. According to the team, the reason...
World-Class Doofus Hunter Strickland Out For Two Months After Punching A Wall<em></em>
Giants reliever Hunter Strickland was very definitively Not Mad while exiting the eventual San Francisco loss last night. On his walk back to the dugout after blowing his team’s lead, Strickland exchanged words with Giant-killing Marlins outfielder Lewis Brinson after Brinson both tagged Strickland...
Ed Werder Bravely Speaks For All The Men Who Don't Have Jobs In Sports Media
Sports Illustrated is looking to hire an entry-level news writer—an hourly position for 40 hours a week—but Ed Werder is explicitly not allowed to apply for the job, and if he does he’ll be chemically sterilized and thrown into a lion pit, as per company policy....
Ronda Rousey Looked Great In Her First Singles Wrestling Match
Ronda Rousey the character has some problems. She smiles too much. She can’t act. Her second feud started at the NBC upfronts. But last night, in her first singles match, Ronda Rousey the wrestler looked like she’s going to be pretty damn good....
Brewers Pitcher Just Barfs Everywhere
Brewers hurler Adrian Houser got recalled from AAA for just his fifth career MLB appearance, was tapped to pitch the top of the eighth inning, finished his warm-up tosses, and then promptly barfed....
Court Records: WWE Doctor Who Sued CM Punk Had Sexual Relationship With Wrestler Patient
Last week, the biggest story in pro wrestling was the civil trial victory of CM Punk (real name Phil Brooks) and Colt Cabana (real name Scott Colton) over WWE ringside physician Dr. Chris Amann, who was suing them for defamation. When Punk left WWE in 2014, he aired all of his grievances, especially...
No Patriots Player Wants To Go On The Record As Saying Bill Belichick Is Fun
This week, Patriots head coach Bill Belichick wrapped up the team’s voluntary OTAs a little early as a little treat, and he also set up an off-the-field activity for his players. (Maybe that’s the damage control required when a former player says it sucked to play for you and trade rumors about one...
Gigantic Basketball Tween Takes On Tiny Opponents And 8-Foot Rims, Leaves No Survivors
Here we have a highlight reel brimming with the exploits of Olivier Rioux, a 12-year-old basketball player who is said to stand at 6 feet and 9 inches. Since most 12-year-olds are not 6-foot-9, you can probably guess how this is going to go for Rioux’s poor opponents:...
Stephen A. Smith Declares His Love For Asses<em></em>
Stephen A. Smith speaks of his adoration for butts in the way a person would speak of an old friend or an enriching life event. On Snoop Dogg’s YouTube show, Smith discusses asses fondly. They have clearly done so much for him....
It's Time For Sweden To Become More Than Just Zlatan's Team
After missing out on the two previous World Cups, Sweden squeaked into this one with an upset win over Italy in qualifying. Simply making the tournament is in many ways an overachievement for this squad, and it’s probably best for them to view things that way. They are in the Group of Death with Ger...
A Good Plant: <i>Ilex Opaca</i>, The American Holly
It has been a rough year for my five little holly trees, transplanted last spring from a nursery to the muddy, weedy slope of the western edge of my home property, along the stupidly long driveway. ...
Jason Heyward, Of All People, Finally Got To Josh Hader
Listen, it is illegal to exhibit any sort of excitement about a potential bounce-back from Jason Heyward until he actually finishes a full season with an OPS over .800. I’m sorry, but that’s just the law, and it has been the law ever since he convinced everyone that 2017 was going to be his big come...
Report: Deontay Wilder And Anthony Joshua Reach Agreement On Heavyweight Unification Mega-Fight
WBC heavyweight champion Deontay Wilder has agreed to terms to fight IBF, IBO, WBA, and WBO champion Anthony Joshua in a highly anticipated and exceedingly rare heavyweight unification bout, to be held in the United Kingdom, according to a report from ESPN’s Dan Rafael:...
High School Pitcher Strikes Out Childhood Friend To Win Game, Immediately Hugs Him
Last Wednesday, an important Minnesota high school baseball game ended with a pitcher rushing home plate, but in a nice way. Mounds View pitcher Ty Koehn struck out Totino-Grace batter Jack Kocon to seal a three-hit shutout and 4-0 victory. Then, the two friends hugged. Aw!...
Cool Dads Stephen Colbert And Patrick Wilson Deliver Surprisingly Earnest National Anthem Performance
You will be forgiven if you look at the seemingly random pairing of Stephen Colbert and Patrick Wilson lining up to perform the national anthem at a Mets game and think “whuh?” Because, like, whuh? A comedian talk show host and the Insidious guy? Turns out, these nerds can fuckin’ sing!...
They Already Said They Weren't Going To Go, Man
Even though LeBron James and Steph Curry had already said that neither of their teams would visit the White House if they won the NBA Finals, today Donald Trump tried to pretend like he wouldn’t have invited them anyway. Surely the basketball players will regret the opportunity to watch a septuagena...