we Page 294 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Accept Your Mediocrity (I'm Fine!)<em></em>
There comes a time in your life when you realize that you are a fairly mediocre human being. You can try to rectify some aspects of the situation—exercise or whatever—but there is little you can actually do to outrun your own unremarkableness. (You can’t outrun it because you’re out of shape.)...
Ashley Feinberg Is Gawker Media's Thirstiest Blogger
We here at Gawker Media are in the business of telling the truth, but we’re also in the business of collaboration. You’ve probably noticed posts from across the Gawker network appearing here on Deadspin, and you’ve probably seen our posts appear on our sister sites. Splicing blogs from site to site ...
Smelliest Sports, Ranked
Ask An Adequate Woman is a space where readers can ask the questions they can’t—or maybe just won’t!—pose to their friends about relationships, fashion, family dramas, dating, existential crises, weird sex stuff, and everything else. The Women of Deadspin (and some of our clever friends) are here to...
Three American Olympians Worth Tuning In For<em></em>
It’s Day 6 at the Olympics, and while athletes like Katie Ledecky, Adrian Carambula, and Mara Abbott have already seized their time on the world stage, more are surely to come. Here are a few American Olympians to watch for:...
A Legitimate Plan To Restore Tug Of War As An Olympic Event
Tug of war was contested as an official Olympic event from 1900 until 1920, when it was culled from the Summer Games program alongside sports like equestrian vaulting (jumping onto—and then off of—a horse), figure skating, and ice hockey. We think it’s time tug of war came back to the Olympics, and ...
![Armenian Weightlifter Suffers Horrifying Elbow Injury [Graphic]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/yatlan6ocszcugirzfi9.jpg)
Armenian Weightlifter Suffers Horrifying Elbow Injury [Graphic]
Andranik Karapetyan is the reigning European champion in 77 kilogram weightlifting, but his hopes for an Olympic medal ended when he suffered a disgusting elbow dislocation while trying to lift 195 kilograms (430 pounds)....
What Do You Think Mr. T Is Daydreaming About? Draw It Here.
While cleaning up around my office this week, I found my old Mr. T coloring book from back in the 80's. Now, I am offering you the opportunity to exhibit your artistic talents. What do you think Mr. T is daydreaming about? Draw it here:...
Épée Is For Losers<em></em>
Fencing is a great sport. It’s pseudo-techno-sword-fighting! What more could you want? I’ll tell you: to get rid of épée, the stupid version of the sport....
Just So You Know, A Real Archer Would Destroy These Olympic Pretenders On The Field Of Combat
I tried watching some Olympic archery competitions. It made me sick. All I saw were a bunch of stationary cowards, shooting arrows in a highly controlled environment while aided by the kind of high-tech equipment you’d expect to find in a Navy SEAL’s locker. I couldn’t stop thinking about how Lars A...
We Must Destigmatize Farting
Bolder minds envision a world free of strife, hunger, inequality. My utopia is a little more modest and attainable: a world where people pass gas freely and openly whenever they have to, unfettered by social mores....
How Many Coworkers Are You Allowed To Bone?
A version of this blog has sat in my drafts folder since March. It would be nice to say that I didn’t publish it back then because we were “going through a change”—we were, we hired two new writers—and it was maybe not the time to gratuitously throw the word “bone” (the colloquial word for the sex a...
<i>SI</i>'s Peter King: I Like To Eat Diarrhea, It's Good, Mmm, Gimme That Hot Diarrhea With Onions
Here is Peter King, a face drawn on the side of Roger Goodell’s hand, telling you two ways that he likes to eat diarrhea. He likes to eat diarrhea on top of spaghetti with onions and cheese, and he likes to eat diarrhea on a hot dog, also with onions, but with no mustard....
Alex Rodriguez Was Big Enough To Take All The Blame
It’s obvious where this begins: Thirteen years ago, at baseball’s annual winter meetings, the entire story was Alex Rodriguez and when and where he would be going. The Texas Rangers, who’d averaged 90 losses in three seasons with Rodriguez at shortstop, had made clear that they wanted out from under...
Look At How Hard These Olympic Weightlifters Are Trying
One of the notable and mesmerizing things about competitive weightlifting (I say from a place of virtually no meaningful knowledge; but, hey) is that it features maybe the simplest form of distilled grit in the Olympics. I’m sure there is invisible strategy and skill in every attempt but, perhaps mo...
Steve Martin Is My Body Icon
I assume that there is an amount of working out, tanning, waxing, and grooming I could do in order to be a moderately more handsome person. I have no interest in doing this. My body icon isn’t a Hemsworth or a Tyrese. It’s Steve Martin, who has mastered the art of looking like the same person for as...
José Mourinho And Manchester United Are Really Feeling Themselves After The Pogba Deal
Yes, Manchester United won a huge, potentially era-defining victory when they convinced Paul Pogba to join them this summer. It makes sense that everyone at the club would be ecstatic about it. What is less necessary is the way the club, and shit-talk lover José Mourinho himself, appear to be using ...
What To Pack For A Nuclear Attack You Won't Survive Anyway
I spend most of my time thinking about one of two frightening things: how I could have had more fun in college, and what will happen when there’s a nuclear attack against the United States. (And I do believe it will happen in my lifetime.) Nuclear war and nuclear terrorism are just about the scaries...
Michael Phelps Drops Tombstone On Chad Le Clos, Wins 20th Gold Medal
Chad le Clos, who took advantage of Michael Phelps’s collapse in the 200 butterfly four years ago, poked the bear last night. He didn’t make it to the medal stand, and Phelps won his 20th gold. Rest in peace....
Deadspin Fears The Basketblogging Horde
There is a private Slack channel that exists entirely to serve as a gallery of weak-sauce garbage takes culled from the big, bloated hellhole that is NBA basketblogging. All your favorites can be found there: Such-And-Such Good Player is Actually Bad Because Analytics; Sam Hinkie, Tragic Hero; Is Su...
Remember When Prince Fielder Slapped An Inside-The-Park Home Run?
According to Ken Rosenthal, the Rangers will announce tomorrow that Prince Fielder is going to retire. Fielder had neck surgery a few weeks ago, and it’s apparently going to keep him from playing again. He will retire with 319 dingers, exactly the same amount as his father Cecil had in his career....