we Page 448 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bernie Brewer Wished Randy Wolf A Happy Birthday Right Before Milwaukee Released Him
Bernie Brewer is a fun-loving mascot, even by mascot standards. He wears a mustard mustache and brings joy and malty hops to all the children of the greater Milwaukee area. Usually. Sometimes he has a sick sense of humor. Sometimes he's a raging asshole. Like today....

Here Are A Bunch Of Photos Of Tom Brady Being Weird With A Dog
Tom Brady didn't play in last night's Patriots-Eagles game, which means that New Englanders need to look elsewhere for their fill of the golden boy. He will not appear in WHDH b-roll, he will not call into Dennis & Callahan, he will not appear below the fold on the front page of the Hartford Courant...

Nothing Better Illustrates The Futility Of Replacement Refs Than This Video Of One Being Hit By A Football
Jerry Frump wore the white hat for last night's Patriots-Eagles preseason game, and like all of this year's replacement-refereed games it was a bit of a disaster for the zebras. While players openly voice concern for their health in games managed by scabs, the NFL seems perfectly content to head i...

Melky Cabrera Cooked Up A Phony Website To Try To Beat His Suspension
The New York Daily News has discovered that in an effort to beat the rap on his 50-game suspension, Melky and his "associates" devised a scheme that included purchasing a website for $10,000, making this website appear to sell a fake product and pretending Melky purchased and used the product, unaw...

Here's A Washington Nationals Fan Firing A Gun From His Car While Driving
This is probably one of the dumbest things I've ever seen committed to pixels. This one has it all. We have this spider web-faced genius firing his gun out his window in a residential neighborhood, speeding through a residential neighborhood, pulling over so he can show the camera his other, bigge...

Is This The Most Terrifying Weather Alert In The History Of Television?
It's midnight. You're snug in your Nashville bed, or maybe on the sofa with your lips wrapped around a crack pipe, I don't know, but whatever excuse you have for watching Jimmy Fallon, that's it....


This Man Is A Standup Comedian And An Evolutionary Anthropologist Studying The Science Of Funny. Ask Him About Jokes.
What do your jokes say about you? That's what Robert Lynch wants to know. He's pursuing his Ph.D. in evolutionary anthropology at Rutgers, and his studies focus on why humans laugh. (He's also a standup comedian.) Lynch is in the discussion below, ready to answer all your questions about the science...

Massive 12-Year-Old Too Big For Pee Wee Football, Too Bad At Football For Middle School Football
KDFW reports on the story of Elijah Earnheart, who at the tender age of 12 is already six feet tall and weighs nearly 300 pounds. Elijah wants to play football, but because of his size, he's been banned from his Mequite (Texas) Pee Wee team. Once you get the giggles out over the Fox screengrab of po...

Catching <em>Phantom Of The Opera</em> With Vince McMahon: More Wrestler Run-Ins
Inspired by the saga of "Wrestling Superstar Virgil," we continue with readers' encounters with the titans of the squared circle. If you've had your own run-in with pro wrestlers past or present, e-mail us, subject line "Virgilbag."...

Lax Bro Apologizes To Entire Southwest Flight For Acting Like A Lax Bro
Lax bros are one of the fastest-growing scourges to American society. They are members of a subculture that is composed entirely of privileged white kids with annoying names. Even worse, they are getting attention from the Boston Globe and stupid movies made about them....

Dictionary Researchers Credit Gary Carter With Popularizing "F-Bomb"
Once again, it's time for the word-lovin' folks at Merriam-Webster to add a few more selections to their growing collection of vernacular. This year, the word "F-bomb" will be included for the first time, along with sexting, energy drink, life coach, and 96 other entries today into its latest print ...

New England Patriots To Work Out Plaxico Burress
Deadspin asks and Bob Kraft delivers. Maybe. After biting on Jerry Jones's double move earlier in the week, Plaxico is finally making his first team visit of the year and may end up with a rival to his two most recent organizations....

Everything You Never Needed To Know About Rhythmic Gymnastics
We love gymnastics. It gets the highest ratings of any summer event. Every four years we fall in love with a new "America's Sweetheart." They get the Wheaties box. The team goes down in history....

A DeLorean Hovercraft Appeared At Last Night's Giants-Rockies Game
Our friends over at Productive Outs let us know about this, one of the more astounding things of the many bizarre ones we've seen in McCovey Cove. It's a DeLorean DMC-12 hovercraft, live and in action....

Everything You Never Needed To Know About Modern Pentathlon
Here's a great way to make some extra cash:...

Olympic Sailing Called Off For Lack Of Wind
Today was to have been the medal race in the 470 class and a consolation race in the Elliott 6m, but the weather in Weymouth was just too darn nice to waste a day sailing. After waiting more than six hours for the wind to pick up, and failing to sacrifice a goat to Aeolus, racing was called off for ...

Here's Video Evidence That Lolo Jones's Teammates Straight Up Do Not Like Her
When we last talked about the Lolo Jones backlash, it was easy to get the impression that the New York Times had gone rogue, drumming up an antagonism where none truly existed, and repackaging quotes from Jones's teammates and an "expert" to serve as a mouthpiece for their own gripes....

Steve Corino Beats Up A Juggalo: More Wrestler Run-Ins
Inspired by the saga of "Wrestling Superstar Virgil," we continue with readers' encounters with the titans of the squared circle. If you've had your own run-in with pro wrestlers past or present, e-mail us, subject line "Virgilbag."...

Jamaica Parties: Foreign Olympics News Bob Costas Couldn't Get It Up For
Deadspin and Gelf Magazine bring you the best (or at least the most interesting) foreign-produced journalism about the London Olympics. ...