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After Being Leveled By Darwin Cook, The Orange Bowl Mascot Will Never Juice Again
This actually came at the end of the 99-yard fumble recovery we showed you last night, and raises a greater paradox than Schrödinger's cat: how do you decapitate a mascot that is only a head? Darwin Cook tried his damndest with a clothesline on Obie, the anthropomorphic Orange Bowl orange....

ShortCenter: Jalen Rose Does Some Method Acting To Discuss LeBron's Post Game
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

The First Two Points Of Kenneth Faried's Career Came On This Silly Rudy Fernandez No-Look Alley-Oop
I hope Faried knows they're not all going to be this easy, or this pretty....

Here's Hipster A-Rod, Cindy Crawford, And Torrie Wilson In A Photo Capturing The Moment America Collapsed In On Itself
Your morning roundup for Jan. 4, the day we identified what doesn't belong. Photo via Hardball Talk. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Orange Bowl Brought Us The Schrödinger's Cat Of Touchdowns
One thing is sure: a touchdown was scored on this play. Regardless of the officials' final verdict (they ruled in favor of West Virginia) there's still plenty of doubt as to exactly which team scored it. [ESPN]...

FBI Docs: How George Steinbrenner Made An Ass Of The FBI Director
The year was 1989. A group of luminaries had gathered to schmooze aboard the USS Intrepid, the World War II-era aircraft carrier on the west side of Manhattan. Among them: Yankees owner George Steinbrenner and then-FBI director William Sessions. The two men couldn't have been more dissimilar. Steinb...

Analyst Trent Dilfer Would Rip Quarterback Trent Dilfer
We're doing a season-long NFL roundtable with our friends at Slate. Check back here each week as a rotating cast of football watchers discusses the weekend's key plays, coaching decisions, and traumatic brain injuries....

Jerry Jones Repeatedly Insists That Tony Romo Was The Fourth-Best Quarterback In The NFL This Year
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: sometimes numbers don't tell the whole story....

Tim Howard Just Scored A Goal
In the game featuring Landon Donovan's Everton debut it was another American, goalkeeper Tim Howard, who stole the show, scoring a goal to put his side up 1-0 on Bolton Wanderers....

We Simulated The NFL White Vs. Black Race Bowl On <em>Madden</em> So You Don't Have To
Earlier this week, reader Dustin asked who would win between an all-white NFL All-Pro team and an all-black NFL All-Pro team. Mind you, this question was asked without ANY ROOTING INTEREST, and without any hint of RAYCESSNESS. Are we clear on that? Good. BECAUSE WE TOTALLY SIMULATED THAT RACE WAR ...

Things You Don't Expect To See On <em>SportsCenter</em>: Chef Emeril Lagasse Shilling For BP
On the same day payments to victims of the BP Gulf oil spill were cut off, celebrity chef Emeril Lagasse appeared on SportsCenter to promote the Gulf Coast Seafood Tourism Bash (brought to you by BP)....

On Second Thought, I Won't Call A.J. Daulerio A Porny Douchebag
Over the next few days, we'll be roasting our former editor A.J. Daulerio, who has moved across the room to edit Gawker, your destination for Mark Zuckerberg upskirts. If you have an A.J. story to share, or if you would like to participate in some other way, please email [email protected]. Lightly...

Demba Ba Drew First Blood For Newcastle Against Man U With This Fantastic Volley
In a week that's belonged to the giant-killers, Newcastle's aiming to be the next David and has a 1-0 edge on Manchester United thanks to this perfectly-placed volley by Demba Ba. [Fox Soccer]...

Nomar Garciaparra Tried To Convince Astronauts The Moon Landing Was Fake, And Other Stories From Six Years In Red Sox PR
Go read Doug Bailey's piece in Boston magazine, because any time a media strategist for one of the most media-dysfunctional franchises in sports starts telling tales out of school, it's well worth your time. Especially when Bailey's former employer is reportedly furious about it. ...

Jets Backup QB Greg McElroy Slams "Selfish" Teammates In Radio Interview
Former Alabama and current Jets rookie backup quarterback Greg McElroy went after his "extremely selfish" teammates in an interview this morning on 97.3 The Zone in Birmingham, claiming multiple teammates "didn't care if we won or lost."...

Deadspin Hall Of Fame Inductee: Brett Favre
Presenting your first 2011 inductee to the Deadspin Hall of Fame......

Other Non-Profit Groups Want Nothing To Do With Jerry Sandusky's Charity
It's no secret that The Second Mile, the charitable organization Jerry Sandusky founded in the 1970s for at-risk children, is in trouble. In November, shortly after the child sex abuse allegations against Sandusky surfaced, Jack Raykovitz, the organization's CEO, resigned. Shortly thereafter, Rayko...

Rick DiPietro Gets Injured While On Injured Reserve
The Islanders' $4.5 million third-string goaltender was sent home to see the doctor after he suffered a lower body injury, even though he's already been on IR for a month. [Newsday]...

Cocaine, Suicide, Women, And Guns: An A.J. Daulerio Story
Over the next few days, we'll be roasting our former editor A.J. Daulerio, who has moved across the room to edit Gawker, a popular Real Housewives fanzine. If you have an A.J. story to share, or if you would like to participate in some other way, please email [email protected]. Lightly sourced sla...

Your Complete Guide To Which Republican Presidential Candidates Are Like Which Quarterbacks
OK, now Michele Bachmann has backed up her claim at being the Tim Tebow of the 2012 presidential campaign by being nearly shut out in the Iowa Republican caucuses. The results are in; here's how the rest of the field shapes up:...