we Page 697 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Even Alaska Wants Nothing To Do With T.O.
Terrell Owens' options grow more limited by the hour, as more teams go on record saying they don't want the controversial wide receiver. His agent, however, says all is good....

T.O. Headed To Tennessee Titans?
According to KSK, T.O. and Drew Rosenhaus were spotted at Nashville airport at 7 a.m. this morning. Owens would do wonders for Vince Young's self-esteem issues.[KSK]...

What Wedding Is Complete Without Soccer Players And Owls?
So what's with the rash of Harry Potter-themed weddings among European soccer players? And where's my invitation, you stupid owl? [Deuce of Davenport]...

Which Team Has Best Odds Of Landing T.O.? (Update)
Much freewheeling speculation on the Interwebs today about where Terrell Owens will end up, but if you want to put your money where your mouth is, one site is actually booking odds....

Cowboys Cut Their Losses and Terrell Owens
There must be a hundred reasons why the Dallas Cowboys' 2008 season was an utter failure, but after thinking it over it seems that Jerry Jones has decided to blame it all on Terrell Owens....

Momentum Gathering For A College Football Playoff?
Mountain West Conference submits proposal to NCAA for an eight-team playoff to determine the BCS champion. NCAA's likely response: "We have a Mountain West Conference?" [USA Today]...

The Tom Brady Body Metamorphosis Is Almost Complete
And here's one for the ladies. Or men who like pictures of shirtless athletes. Tom Brady has been spending this off-season rehabbing, marrying, and getting all Vin Diesel'd....

Plaxico Burress Can Come Back As Long As He Stops Shooting Himself In The Leg
Giants GM, Jerry Reese: "Right now he is still a Giant and if things work out and he's on board with what we want coming back, we'd love to have him back." [SI]...

ESPN "The Weekend" Not Much Fun For Bristoloids This Year — Especially Buster Olney (UPDATE)
This past weekend was ESPN's annual shmooze-fest at Disney World, where fans of the network can interact with living, breathing ESPN talking heads and touch them to see if they're real....

Usain Bolt To Asafa Powell: "Fix My Car"
Asafa Powell lost the "World's Fastest Man" title to Usain Bolt, then spent the winter fixing up Bolt's Honda Accord. Is that sadder than the fact that the "World's Fastest Man" drives an Accord? [Australian]...

Eddie Hightower Finds The Nexus Of The Universe In Champaign
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Jay Mariotti Calls Shenanigans On Matt Cassel Trade
Gentleman Jay Mariotti knows a raw deal when he sees one and something about that Matt Cassel to Kansas City trade does not smell right to him....

Oh, Lady, This Probably Wasn't A Good Idea
The New England Patriots held open cheerleader tryouts today and it appears one woman, 41-years-spry-and-sassy, Shelly Lawlor, feels she's up to the challenge. Good for her?...

Kurt Warner And Tim Tebow Finally Hook Up
What's more shocking — that Rick Reilly has never met Dave Barry or that Kurt Warner had never spoken to Tim Tebow? Well, at least, one of these duos have finally made a connection....

Dreamboat Captain Takes The Reins, Marries Gisele
Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen are officially a couple in the eyes of God. According to US Magazine,Brady and Bundchen wed last night in front of family, friends, and a furious Bridget Moynahan....

How About A Rasheed Wallace Flip Out For Old Time's Sake?
The Detroit Pistons are free falling and when a tenuous group of aging veterans begins to run out of gas late in the season that's usually a perfect time for an embarrassing on-court temper tantrum....

The Real Reason For Jeff Reed's Towel Tantrum
I know the idea of Jeff Reed, drunk in a gas station bathroom at 3:00 a.m. sounds improbable, but there was actually a very good reason for it. He was paid to do it!...

Revisiting Jeff Reed's Paper Towel Freakout: An Investigative Report
You're probably thinking to yourself, "Hey, did they ever fix the towel dispenser that Jeff Reed broke?" That or you were thinking of pie. Quite often it's pie....

Jerry Wishes Everyone Would Just Shut the Hell Up
Dallas owner, and noted crazy person, Jerry Jones has issued an organizational gag order to prevent leaks, even the ones that aren't real....

This Will Be The Last Thing You See Before You Die
Nightmare Ant popped up at a high school basketball game last night to do his usual job of spooking unsuspecting fans, making young children wail in terror, and darkening souls....