we Page 699 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Andy Roddick Will Marry Brooklyn Decker Next Weekend, Deucebag Says (Update)
Sometime Deadspin tennis correspondent Dylan Stableford reports that Andy Roddick and Brooklyn Decker will officially become a boring married couple in Austin, Tx. next weekend. His full emailed report appears once you click More....
Women, Children Frightened By Giant Hamburger
The official unveiling of the West Michigan Whitecaps' immense 5,000-calorie Fifth Third Burger on Thursday stirred up a variety of emotions, but the following quote is by far my favorite:...
Down In Front, Regis! Celebrity Fans And Why We Hate Them
It's Waxing Off, the Internet feature that was planted in the ground by God to test our faith. This week's topic: The scourge of celebrity sports fans....
Programming Notes
Send along today's tips to both [email protected] and [email protected]....
All Right, I'll Attend Your Stinking Workouts
After saying that he wouldn't attend the Bills' voluntary offseason conditioning program because it was, well, voluntary, Terrell Owens changes his mind and shows up on Wednesday. [The Buffalo News]...
Leave Tony Romo Alone! (Sob) He's A Human Being!
Eminem is back after a two-year hiatus (I know you've been waiting), and his new single, We Made You, should horrify Cowboys fans. Will the indignities never end for Tony Romo?...
Orioles Fans Prepared To Explain To Teixeira That All Is Forgiven
The weather looks fine for the Orioles home opener today against the Yankees (4 p.m., ET), with the forecast calling for scattered clouds, variable winds and a 95 percent chance of heavy cursing at Mark Teixeira....
The Calipari Daughters Should Probably Get Off Of Facebook Immediately
Although the piles of money and ego-stroking are enormous when you join a big-time program like the University of Kentucky, there are downsides. You know, like a burgeoning online interest in your young daughters....
If You've Eaten A Four-Pound Burger, Of Course You'll Need A Giant Plunger
Still grappling with the media frenzy over its monstrous 5,000-calorie burger, the West Michigan Whitecaps, masters of the metaphor, have installed a giant plunger in the outfield that squirts water on fans....
B.J. Raji Just Warren Sapp'd Himself
The Boston College defensive tackle tested positive for marijuana. [ATLeagle.com]...
Brewers Fan Saves Bikini Girl From Rogue Home Run Ball
Imagine a young woman innocently sunbathing at a baseball game, when a vicious home run ball comes rocketing toward her unsuspecting frame, with nothing but a bikini top to defend herself? What do you do?!...
Red Sox Owner John Henry Doing What Old, Rich Men Do — Marrying A 30-Year-Old Lass
John Henry's status as one of the architects of the Red Sox revival period has paid off handsomely for his wallet and his love life, as he's set to wed 30-year-old Linda Pizzuti....
Giant Burger Of Doom Now Comes With A Side Of Controversy
West Michigan Whitecaps are refusing an advocacy group's demand that they put a warning label on their 4,800-calorie super-burger. [NBCSports]...
Who Is This Dashing Soccer Player, And Why Is He Using His Hands?
Hint: He now makes millions playing a different sport, and once dated Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Biel. Yes, it's Derek Jeter, whose mom once again forgot to bring the post-game orange slices....
Yes, Robert Powell Is Very Proud To Be A Policeman
The Dallas cop who made national news thanks to his heartless treatment of Texans' running back Ryan Moats' grieving family has a MySpace page that's not at all surprising. [SBB]...
Brady's New Wife Reveals Many Things About Their Relationship (And Her Body) In Vanity Fair Interview
Gisele Bundchen gives Vanity Fair a candid glimpse into her new domesticated life as Mrs. Tom Brady. Nude, of course....
Mike Krzyzewski, The Final Depantsing
It's not so troublesome that Mike Krzyzewski was in this Guitar Hero commercial; it seems he's spent all season with his pants around his ankles, as other teams run off with his lunch money....
More Sweet Sixteen Duan: Discuss Your Brackets, Make Out With An Avatar, Type Insulting Things About Your Mothers
Louisville/Arizona are starting...now! For those of you with Friday night plans to watch the games, tipple, rip, and sniff here's the spot for you. And stop leering — she's 16, for god sakes!...
The Comment Of The Week Is Not A Slave To Fashion
Welcome to Deadspin's famed Comment of the Week feature, wherein we recognize some of Deadspin's wittiest and best-written comments from the week that was, and give away valuable mystery prizes....
So That's Why He's On The Cover Of Sports Illustrated
Fields is not Pitt's best 3-point shooter, but he always takes the big shots at the end of games. Fields made a winning 3-pointer to beat Duke at Madison Square Garden last season and made two more clutch 3-pointers in the waning moments when the Panthers beat Connecticut in February....