we Page 710 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

At Long Last: T.O. and Jessica Simpson are buddies
In a hard-hitting interview with US Magazine, T.O. explains that he was joking about Jessica being bad luck for Tony Romo and the Cowboys. T.O. wishes good luck to the couple and per US Weekly, "I told her she is welcome to the stadium anytime. I told her she can come down and sit in my section, I’m...

New England Patriots Helmet Tattoo Guy Auctioning Off Rest of Body
Not content with the awesomest tattoo ever, Victor Thompson will now sell off other places on his body to the highest bidder. He's even set up his own website, tattmetoo.com . For the low price of $200 per square inch, you can make it happen....

Gisele Bundchen's Buttock-Baring Shorts Can Finally Be Seen As They Were Originally Intended
Plenty of online pants-stirring commotion occurred a few months ago when photos of Tom Brady's girlfriend Gisele Bundchen getting a butt-buff were loosed upon the internet masses. Finally, V magazine's fall issue was released and the photos of Gisele doing her whole giraffe-wearing-Daisy Dukes routi...

These Are Clapping Dogs, Rhythmic Dogs, First-Pitching Dogs, House Dogs, Street Dogs
Uno, who I believe was named for the card game I never bothered to learn, continues to blaze trails for doggykind. Back in February, he became the first beagle ever to win the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show (though Snoopy remains the first to be a World War I flying ace). Yesterday, he "threw" ou...

Transitions Are Happening All Over
• Clay Travis comes on board and No Homo Nation comes alive...

Introducing Your New Weekend Crew
It is my distinct pleasure to announce the formation of a new stable of writers who will be handling weekend duties here at Deadspin. Beginning in August we'll be featuring four new primary weekend writers, as well as two tremendous swing contributors who will presumably write for the site while not...

Travis Henry Should Really Invest In Some Better Goldenseal
According to a clandestine "NFL source" former Denver Broncos' running back Travis Henry has once again tested positive for marijuana. Henry, if found guilty, will undoubtedly be suspended for a year after this latest infraction. Last year, he appealed a positive test and won, allowing him to be a v...

Jelena Jankovic Gets Proactive About That Not-So-Fresh Feeling
You know, back in the days before I was married it used to take panties coming off to get me excited. Now panties going on does the trick just as well. In related news noted women's right advocate Justin Gimelstob announced that all women should play without panties on the WTA....

Mike Lowell Kills With Cell Phone Pranks
Those crafty Red Sox, you never know what they're going to be up to next....

Wisconsin Welcomes Carsten Charles Sabathia
I didn't know this, but apparently a local restaurant chain dustributes discounted hamburgers each time the Brewers score five or more runs. Not surprisingly, this is causing a bigger stir in Milwaukee than the arrival of CC Sabathia from the Indians ... but CC is a close second....

Attack Of (And Farewell To) The Purple
Slate's Robert Weintraub, like many of us, loves the old purple prose of early 1900s sportswriting, the Grantland Rices, the men who painted epic tales of warriors, grizzled combatants and lardywarks too manly to wear gloves. In an occasional series, Weintraub writes about the week's best baseball g...

On Vincent Gallo, Black Gallagher And Rotten.com Videos
This video has been online for about a year now, but I just saw it for the first time today. It's brutal, punishing and so uncalled for that it should come with a Tipper Gore warning. It's from 2001, when my immortal beloved Rick Ankiel was still struggling with his "control" and some minor leagu...

Northwestern Steals Michigan Signs; Ball Boys to the Rescue
Way back in 1997, student managers brought it to Lloyd Carr's attention that those witty rascals at Northwestern were stealing signals from the Michigan offense. Well, okay, maybe not so much stealing signals as noticing what a single player was doing. Perhaps this explains the memorable Northwester...

Morning Blogdome: Hiroki Kuroda Gets Rattled By The Rush
• Domo arigato Hiroki Kuroda: Almost perfect. But, alas, the Dodgers' rookie pitcher gave up one hit, 0 BBs, on the way to a 3-0 victory over the Atlanta Braves last night. Says a starstruck Joe Torre: "That was about as machine and robotic as you've ever seen a pitcher throw one strike after anothe...

C.C. Sabathia On His Way To Milwaukee
Or so says everyone from Cleveland, to Milwaukee, to Buster Olneyville. The Cleveland Indians, who at the beginning of the season thought they'd be able to compete, have officially moved white-flagged it by shuttling their number one starter with the crooked cap to the Milwaukee Brewers for power-ba...

Well, That Was A Fun First Week
• Shaun Suisham does not have a foot of the Gods....

Olympic Criminals Are No Match For The Chinese Scooter Police
You may think that you're a clever subversive, plotting to wreak mayhem at the Olympic Games. But you didn't count on the Glorious People's Scooter Police. Hands up, terrorist dogs! Hey, no fair fleeing over that slightly uneven terrain! Come back here!...

Your Fourth Of July Throwgasm Breakdown
Drew Magary's Balls Deep column runs every Thursday afternoon. Except this week, due to the holiday. Drew's new book, "Men With Balls," featuring 100% new material, is available for pre-order here. You can email Drew here....

At Last, An Olympic Mascot We Can All Relate To
If you're tired of stories about earthquakes and censorship and brutal beatdowns of Tibetan monks, then forget about the Beijing Olympics for a moment, and remember that plans are already underway for the 2012 Games in London. Things will be decidedly more upbeat in these Olympics, to be sure; as we...

Prof. Splash Gets Tenure at University of Awesome's College of Kickass
Darren Taylor, a former strip club DJ, has catapulted to amazing heights in life, only so that he may jump from them into shallow pools of water. Now known as Professor Splash, broke his own record when he plunged from 35 feet, five inches into 12 inches of water in a padded kiddie pool....