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NFL Season Preview: New England Patriots
The NFL season has officially started, so it's time to fucking finish the impassioned season previews from various writers, bloggers, diehard fans, cooks, TV personalities, and numerous other walks of life whom consider football the only sport worth watching. Clearly, these previews will be running ...

Let's Not Jump To Conclusions About Chalmers And Arthur
Yesterday's news about former Jayhawk heroes Mario Chalmers and Darrell Arthur allegedly getting caught with "marijuana and women" at NBA rookie transition program has put their current teams in a bind (Chalmers was supposed to compete for the Heat's starting point guard job) and their former head c...

Penn State Football Players Apartment Searched; Marijuana Found
This story is still filtering out, but it appears that the Penn State discipline dance continues. Last night a warrant was obtained to search the apartment shared by four Penn State football players: AJ Wallace, Andrew Quarless, Maurice Evans and Abe Koroma. Police responded to a complaint at 8, kn...

Floyd Mayweather Missing $7 Million In Jewelry After Robbery
Which is a real shame because Mayweather was using the $7 million in jewelry as a hedge against inflationary pressures brought on by the falling dollar and the continuing mortgage crisis. That or it was just sitting around in his house on the night of August 17th between 7 and 9 when it suddenly di...

Tiger Woods' Knee Injury Did Not Hinder His Baby-Making Ability
Those of you wondering when Tiger Woods and his wife Elin will populate the world with another Swedecaublasian can stop: late winter. Woods made the blessed announcement on his personal website, which he's updated more frequently due to his season-ending surgery as either a way to continuously keep ...

Just Don't Follow Him to Any Golden Clubs
You've got to give the kid credit: he does not shy away from insurmountable expectations. After following in his father's legendary footsteps at Georgetown, Patrick Ewing Jr., son of NBA Hall of Famer (scans NBA almanac) Patrick Ewing, is now a New York Knick. It's already Junior's third team, and h...

Gustav Evacuees Prompt LSU To Bump Kickoff Up To 11 AM ET
For those of you that thought our first college football Saturday couldn't start soon enough, you're in luck. That is, unless you live near the Gulf Coast, in which case you're probably running for your life from Hurricane Gustav. The Class 3 hurricane is expected to hit the Gulf Coast sometime Mon...

Week In Review: You Know, Sarah Palin Was Once A Budding Hannah Storm
So can somebody out there dig up some footage of "presumptive" GOP VP Sarah Palin in her days as a fledgling sports reporter in Anchorage? Does that footage even exist or did it melt inside some igloo? This is, though, an interesting choice. Kind of takes the teary-eyed sparkle off of Obama's Victor...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you get home via the awesome power of beer ... • Boxing: Champion Matt Godfrey vs. Emmanuel Nwodo, in Uncasville, Conn. (9 p.m., ET). Title Wave engulfs Mohegan Sun Arena. [ESPN2] • College football: Temple at Army (7 p.m., ET) [ESPN Classic]; Southern Methodist at Rice (8 p.m., ...

Save the Three Daves of JP/LF/Raycom...Please, God, No
There's a movement afoot, led by esteemed Southern football writer Tony Barnhart, to save the three Daves from the college football scrap heap in the wake of the new ESPN deal with the SEC. This is the rough equivalent of calling for the Berlin Wall to be rebuilt on the morning after it was torn do...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after just another typical Deadspin pants party ... • MLB: Chicago Cubs at Pittsburgh (7 p.m., ET). Not mentioned: Barack Obama also prefers the Pirates to the Cubs. [WGN] • Tennis: U.S. Open, men's and women's first round, at New York (7 p.m., ET). If sitting in a parked car outside o...

College Football Previews: #3 Ohio State
Today's preview is brought to us by Matt from Buckeye Commentary. We're just two days away from kickoff. Is your blood not pounding at the thought of Oregon State-Stanford? STRENGTHS Stiff-arm delivering running back? Check. Best cover corner in college football? Check. Sick linebackers and the nat...

Tom Brady's E: Meet Will McDonough
In a really fascinating article and very well written piece, Brady's E, Will McDonough, is credited with the quarterback's rise from awkward media interviewee to a stylish, model-dating, European-vacationing metrosexual. Depending on your particular persuasion this either makes McDonough the anti-c...

They Must Be Coming By Sea
David Hirshey Michael Bertin writes regularly for Deadspin about soccer. Arsene Wenger would have made a good captain for the Titanic. That has less to do with any nautical skills that he may or may not have, than it does with hubris. This is an Arsenal side he has claimed in print has the ability ...

Take Us Home, Oh Mudda Fadda; Take Us Home from Beijing
So, yeah. This is it. Tonight's the last night of co-ed Rings summer camp and tomorrow our parents will be here to pick us up and take us home and we'll spend all our time with our old steady sports and we'll promise to write about swimming and gymnastics and equestrian events but we never will, so ...

A Treed Blogger is a Dangerous Blogger (At Least Until the Batteries Run Out)
After we've finished a long day of blogging, we like to pour ourselves a tall Arnold Palmer (with enough whiskey to drown a horse) into a Thermos, pack the latest Uncle John's Bathroom Reader into a knapsack, and scurry up a tree for a relaxing afternoon. There, we find a perfect disconnect from the...

To Watch Tonight: The Winner Takes It All
What to watch to overcome your disappointment in the Golf Digest submission standards... • NFL Preseason Football: Steelers vs. Vikings (8 pm ET) - The Vikings' mastery of steel is well-documented. The Steelers' mastery of vike, on the other hand, has less supporting evidence. [CBS] • NASCAR: Sharpi...

Mort Didn't Get Big; The Stories Got Small
Hi; we're Tuffy. Thanks for having us. But enough pleasantries. We don't have much to add to Gene Upshaw's passing that Michael Silver didn't already cover. However, we'd like to pull our good friends ESPN over for a moment and have a quick chat about their coverage of a man's passing. C'm'ere. Tak...

College Football Previews: #8 West Virginia
We're rolling through the Top 25 and getting ever closer to kickoff. Just one week from today. John Radcliff brings the West Virginia preview. John blogs about West Virginia at Mountain Lair and writes for FanHouse. Strengths Guns and Moonshine are plentiful, and the mountains create a natural barr...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you realize your father is quite probably insane ... • Little League Baseball: World Series at South Williamsport, Pa., U.S. semifinal, Waipahu, Hawaii, vs. Mill Creek, Washington (8 p.m., ET). Giant 12-year-olds terrorize the 200-foot fences. [ESPN] • MLB: Los Angeles Angels at Tam...