worldcup Page 48 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Iran Have The Right Type Of Squad To Shock The World
Iran almost had it....
Will Luis Suárez Do Something Crazy Stupid Or Crazy Awesome At This World Cup?
Uruguay have what it takes to mount another charge deep into the latter stages of the World Cup like the one they made to the semifinals in 2010. They still have one of the very best defensive fronts in the game. They still have a steely midfield capable of swatting away incoming attacks, and have b...
Saudi Arabia Have The Honor Of Being The Shittiest Team In The World Cup
In truth, I know next to nothing about the Saudi Arabia national team. Which actually doesn’t matter much, because apparently they really suck....
Egypt Are A One-Man Team, Which Is Fine If That One Man Is Mohamed Salah
Mohamed Salah’s injury could not have come at a worse time. Liverpool’s newly anointed superstar was wrapping up a dream club season that featured 44 goals in 52 appearances and culminated in Kiev with a shot at ending Real Madrid’s Champions League dominance. Instead of capping a perfect season by ...
Russia Might Be A Threat To International Democracy, But They Are Nothing To Fear At The World Cup
We’ve finally made it! After four long years, the greatest sporting event on the planet has returned!...
Your Guide To The CONIFA World Cup, The World Cup For Not-Quite-Countries<em></em>
LONDON — “We have nothing against FIFA,” CONIFA General Secretary Sascha Düerkop told a tittering press corps on Wednesday. We were all sitting in the basement of a student accommodation block in North London. “They are very great to learn how not to do things.” ...
Reports: Dislocated Shoulder Could Knock Mohamed Salah Out Of The World Cup
Saturday’s Champions League final was a feverish, spectacular affair featuring memorable feats of athleticism, an even more memorable all-time boner, and a perfectly timed idiot on the pitch. The match was pretty significantly marred, though, by a first half injury to world-destroying goal-bot Moham...
Argentina FA Puts Out World Cup Manual With Chapter On Picking Up Russian Women
The Argentine Football Association, the country’s governing body of soccer, held on Tuesday a course for players, coaches, executives, and reporters heading to Russia for next month’s World Cup. The course, taught by Russian language teacher, Eduardo Pennisi, included a manual, “Russian Language and...
Father Of Future American Wonderteen Barron Trump Tries To Threaten His Way To A North American World Cup
The father of noted Arsenal fan and possible future of American soccer Barron Trump, Donald Trump, took a break from caring about a black person tonight and delivered a message about the U.S.’s joint World Cup bid that should be not-at-all off-putting to the voters in the countries it’s meant to add...
Fox Sports Is Half-Assing The World Cup
Fox Sports, who paid an unprecedented $425 million for the TV rights to the 2018 and 2022 World Cups—before the U.S. team shockingly failed to qualify—announced today that it is essentially giving up on trying to make its World Cup broadcast as good as it could be. But, don’t worry, it will be a lo...
Russian Soccer Fans Reportedly Chanted Monkey Noises At Black French Players
In yesterday’s friendly between France and Russia in St. Petersburg, Russian soccer fans reportedly continued their long and fervent tradition of being super racist to black players by chanting monkey noises at French players Paul Pogba and Ousmane Dembélé. The Associated Press reported that the abu...
Here Are The New Kits The USMNT Won't Wear At The World Cup This Year
U.S. Soccer unveiled the new uniforms for the men’s and women’s national teams in what amounted to a Friday afternoon news dump. The timing was strange, and almost made it seem like they didn’t want to remind everyone that the U.S. men’s national soccer team will not be wearing these sweet new kits ...
Slightly Defective Museum Cat Clearly The Animal To Beat In Predicting The World Cup
We are just 12 weeks away from some soccer games, but more importantly we are just 12 weeks away from a bunch of animals picking the winners of those soccer games. Following in the footsteps of Paul the octopus and Clam the psychic clam, a veritable menagerie of clairvoyant creatures are preparing t...
FIFA Agrees To Infect This Summer's World Cup With Video Replay
We’ve made the case time and again for why VAR, soccer’s video replay system, sucks ass. Apparently our cries for sanity have fallen on deaf ears, because reports say the chuckleheads at FIFA have just agreed to inflict VAR upon the upcoming World Cup in Russia....
World Cup Construction Workers Go Months At A Time Without A Day Off
A consultant group serving as the “External Compliance Monitor” for the 2022 FIFA World Cup released its second annual report on Wednesday detailing labor conditions at construction sites in Qatar. The tone of the accompanying press release is positive, touting “a new spirit” and labor law reforms (...
America's World Cup Hosting Bid Might Fail Because Everyone Hates Donald Trump
In a blessed confluence of somewhat unexpected events, Donald Trump’s presidency has thus far avoided bringing permanent ruin to the country and the world. The sheer odiousness of his status as president of the U.S. does, however, appear at risk of ruining this country’s shot at hosting the 2026 Wor...
Bad Fans Try Distracting Skier By Throwing Snowballs
It is—with good reason—generally very difficult to smuggle anything that could be considered a legitimate or even semi-legitimate threat of violence or distraction into a major sporting event. How do bad fans get around that? They use whatever they might find waiting for them in the stands. Like, at...
Crazy Russian Lady Slaps Carles Puyol In Face With Big Ol' Dildo
Retired Barcelona legend Carles Puyol expected to fiddle around with an assortment of (plastic) balls when he participated in last week’s World Cup group draw in host country Russia. But what he could not have expected was being accosted by a lady telling him “I want to fuck you, I have so big dick,...
Here Are The Groups For The 2018 World Cup
It’s been three and a half years since the last World Cup, and after a long wait we’re tantalizingly close. Now we have something real to look at until the summer after the teams that made the tournament were drawn into their groups today:...