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Northern Kentucky University Athletic Director Dismissed For Affairs With Four Staffers, One Student
More athletic directors in the news! Northern Kentucky University dismissed Scott Eaton, once an athletic administrator at Brown and a member of the NKU department since 1998, for undisclosed reasons in early March. As we learned late yesterday, Eaton was guilty of "inappropriate, intimate relations...

Using Weed To Pay For A Cab Ride In Front Of Cops Is Never A Good Idea
Just, you know, FYI. Because Michael Medvec, a 23-year-old Philly resident, tried it last Friday night, when he didn't have the eight bucks he needed to pay the fare back to his apartment. Let's read along with the Philadelphia Daily News, which got the deets from Philly police captain Brian Korn:...

Dude Catches Foul Ball, Transforms Into Sexiest Man Alive
You know what, I don't really want to make any jokes or be cynical about this. That girl is just super proud of her boyfriend/husband, and she must love him very much. Happy Friday, everyone....

Help! What Can I Do About My Stinky Feet?
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every other week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Email her....

Did The Rangers Leave Michael Young's Locker Open Out Of Respect, Or Does Ron Washington Just Think They Did?
Our pal Drew Fairservice at Getting Blanked spotted this bit of weirdness concerning the status of Michael Young's former space in the Texas Rangers' locker room. This morning, baseball writer Bob Nightengale tweeted the following:...

How To Be A Good Captive, And Other Notes From My Fake Kidnapping
I have an article in this month's GQ about my experience with a luxury abduction service, which I paid to kidnap me and hold me captive for 14 hours or so. (Here I am talking about the story on The Howard Stern Show, if you care to listen.) Given that Adam Thick, owner and operator of Extreme Kidnap...

Roy Halladay Had A Historically Weird Night
Last night, Roy Halladay left his start against the Atlanta Braves with a mind-boggling stat line. He exited with one out in the fourth inning after surrendering five earned runs, three walks, two home runs, and striking out nine. Nine! According to Baseball Reference, no pitcher has ever struck out...

Is Monkey In The Middle The Meanest Childhood Game?
I spent spring break at my sister's house last week and one night when I was there I was on the couch, watching the tourney and picking at my feet. I tore off this flap of skin that had really bugged me all day, and when I tore it off, BLOOD EVERYWHERE. My big toe was hemorrhaging plasma. I ran on m...

Gus Johnson Will Be The Voice Of Soccer, Even If He Has To Ruin The Champions League To Get There
Goal-line technology? FIFA corruption? Landon Donovan’s magical mystery tour? America's biggest soccer controversy is, unexpectedly, Gus Johnson. Upon the announcement that Fox would use Screamin’ Gus as its lead announcer for the 2018 World Cup, public reaction sorted itself into two extremist camp...

Here's How Rangers Broadcasters Reacted To Yu Darvish Blowing His Perfect Game With A Single Out Remaining
Japanese pitching phenom Yu Darvish nearly entered the record books tonight in Houston until Marwin Gonzalez singled up the middle with two outs in the ninth, ruining Darvish's attempt to complete a perfect game against the Astros....

Tuesday Night Fights: In Which A Bieber Wannabe Gets Slapped Around In The Street
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: the aptly named, "Street Fight." Tonight's commentator: Deadspin commenter and degenerate boxing fan Iron Mike Gallego. (Coming next week: a roller derby powerhouse exa...
![Something Very Weird Happened At The End Of Tonight's Ohio Lottery Numbers Announcement [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Something Very Weird Happened At The End Of Tonight's Ohio Lottery Numbers Announcement [UPDATE]
We're legitimately concerned about the health of Ohio Lottery host Karen Kawolics tonight, as she appeared to have significant issues getting through the nightly announcement of the state's lotto numbers....

Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>Dora The Explorer</i>
A look at the awful children’s programming you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours. Illustration by Jim Cooke....

Meet Steve Alford, UCLA's Future Former Basketball Coach
Few people have perfected the art of professional escape like Steve Alford, the newly former New Mexico coach who is now the future former coach of UCLA. Nine days after getting drummed out of the NCAA tournament by Haaarvaaard and two days before his 10-year, $20 million contract with the Lobos was...

Comcast SportsNet's White Sox Intro Video Is One Of The Worst Things Ever Put On Television And Possibly Harmful To Your Health
Most discerning baseball fans go out of their way to avoid local broadcasts of the Chicago White Sox. After all, that's where you find Ken “Hawk” Harrelson, and to voluntarily listen to Hawk is to willingly subject yourself to the threat of severe brain damage. Seriously, you'd be better off huffing...

Sandy Koufax Relieves Magic Johnson To Throw Out First Pitch On Opening Day
OK, this was a great bit of theatrics. Just as Magic was getting ready to throw the first pitch to Orel Hersheiser, Dodgers manager Don Mattingly came out to the mound and called for the lefty. ...

Somebody Took Over Manti Te'o's Old Twitter Account And Is Reviving His Old Tweets—Including Those To Lennay Kekua
Just when we thought things on the Manti Te'o/Lennay Kekua front were over, they got weird again. Earlier this month, an unknown individual assumed control of Manti Te'o's deleted Twitter account, recreated its appearance, and started tweeting. The tweets weren't original, though; they were recycled...

UCLA Has Its First New Basketball Coach In 11 Years: The Architect Of New Mexico's Loss To Harvard
Steve Alford, a well-known name in basketball since he was a coach's favorite on the Hoosiers teams of the mid-80s, has signed on to replace Ben Howland at UCLA. As pointed out in Andy Katz's report, Alford's new contract with UCLA means breaking an almost equally new contract with New Mexico, where...

