x Page 765 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Who Is The Most Masturbated-To Woman In History?
I just recently got a Christmas card from Drew and his family and I have to say: Is there any bigger fucking waste of time, energy, and paper than a Christmas card? I understand why people used to do it before Facebook existed, but currently, if someone has a baby, not a day goes by that a photo of ...
The Only "Athletes Sing Christmas Carols" Video That Matters: Sheed Remixing Jingle Bells
Oh, you've never seen the Pistons singing "Jingle Bells" circa 2006? Get out of my face....
What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year?
As in past years, the Sun Sentinel has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, we have trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity. ...
Virginia Tech Cornerback Antone Exum Took Some Random Kids At Best Buy On A $470 Shopping Spree
The NCAA allows bowl participants to accept sponsors' gifts up to $550 in value, and for players competing in Friday's Russell Athletic Bowl most of that value came in a $470 Best Buy gift card. That's valuable potential swag for most college kids, but Hokies defensive back Antone Exum—caught up in...
!["Hallelujah, Holy Shit! Where's The Tylenol?": Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup [Updated]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1899jl1oxhk5ugif.gif)
"Hallelujah, Holy Shit! Where's The Tylenol?": Your Sunday NFL GIF Roundup [Updated]
We'll be putting all our GIFs for the day here, from London Fletcher losing his lunch to sad Tom Brady. We'll update the post as the later games conclude, so stay tuned. ...
Daryl Johnston Is Wearing This Right Now
Top five weirdest things about that thing Daryl Johston is wearing, on his body:...
The Raiders Cost Oakland 200 Police Officers In A Startlingly Direct Way
We looked at the steady increase in taxpayer-funded stadium construction recently, and Sports on Earth wrote about what they term "sports welfare"—this week, Bloomberg explained a combination of those phenomena, and a notably clear example of the way sports franchises can factor into the zero-sum ga...
Carlton Fisk's Home Robbed Of Thousands Of Dollars In Collectible Coins; Carlton Fisk Had Thousands Of Dollars Worth Of Collectible Coins
Burglars broke into Carlton Fisk's home in Manatee, FL yesterday, according to a lengthy report in the Sarasota Herald-Tribune. Despite the presence of valuable baseball memorabilia and, presumably, electronics, jewelry and other frequently pilfered items, the burglars took only one thing:...
The Xavier Musketeers Are Wearing "Sandy Hook" Jerseys Today, Will Sell Them To Support Newtown Families
First thought: Wait, are they really? There is such a thing as too much, right?...
Forbes's 2012 List Of The Most Valuable Teams In College Football Reads A Lot Like The 1936 AP Poll
Forbes's latest best guess at the most valuable college football programs is out, and if you're a Texas fan, congratulations: Your slavering devotion to the Death Star of the Big 12 has paid off once again. You're number one! Granted, you're in the "also receiving votes" category in the AP's poll of...
Stop Concern-Trolling About Johnny Manziel's Basketball Tickets
There are two ways to look at this brief cut of Thursday night's nationally televised game between the Mavericks and the Heat, in which Steve Kerr proposes that Johnny Manziel ought to be the subject of suspicion because he is ostensibly an unpaid amateur and he was sitting in extremely expensive ...
The Buffalo Bills Are Not Moving To Toronto, Los Angeles Or Anywhere Else For At Least Seven More Years
The lease on Ralph Wilson Stadium was set to expire in July, and, while team owner and president Ralph Wilson has long said that the Bills wouldn't move while he was alive, Ralph Wilson is 94, and the Bills seemed to be inching further away from Buffalo every season. "Home" games in Toronto's Rogers...
The Bulls-Knicks Game Went To Complete Shit Last Night, And Produced This Beautiful GIF Of A Dismayed Spike Lee
When you're not particularly used to losing, any downturn in your fortunes seems like it must be the result of some malevolent scheme from outsiders that bear you ill will. Such was the case for the Knicks last night when they fell down big in an ugly game against the Bulls and decided they didn't ...
What People Said About the Piece of Shit Video Game the NRA Made Six Years Ago
Welcome back to "Backhanded Box Quotes," a collection of measured, thoughtful criticism from the user reviews of Metacritic and elsewhere on the Internet. ...
Cockblocked By John Denver!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase two heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Relax, Everyone, Novak Djokovic Is Not Hoarding All The World's Donkey Cheese (Yet)
Hang on! Stop everything! There was no bigger story in sports in the last two weeks than the news that Novak Djokovic had cornered the market on the world's annual supply of donkey cheese to supply his restaurants in his native Serbia. But, bummer: The New York Times flooded the zone (not really) to...
Josh Hamilton Blames All His Late-Season Struggles On Quitting Tobacco
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Anaheim is getting a chaw-free Hamilton....
Jake LaMotta Is 90 Years Old And About To Get Married For The Seventh Time
There's no getting down boxing's real-life Raging Bull, and the New York Post has heard things: former middleweight champ Jake LaMotta, age 90, plans to marry Denise Baker, his fiancée of the last dozen years or so, on Jan. 4 in Bisbee, Ariz. It will be LaMotta's seventh wedding, and the Post says B...
Here Are Some Photos Of J.J. Watt Bro-ing Down At The Club
The Texans clinched the AFC South with Sunday's win over the Colts, and defensive end J.J. Watt was eager to celebrate after the game. Those brash boozehounds over at Shot of Ginn have six photos of Watt bringing the cool to what looked like a swell time at the 5th Amendment in Houston, and we sugge...
Fat Chipper Jones Is Throwing A Horrible Super Bowl Party
You will recall that a grown man who called himself "Chipper" used to play third base for the Atlanta Braves. You will recall, too, that he is fat and dates a Playboy model. He also has a Twitter feed. And an upcoming Super Bowl party. What a Super Bowl party it is....