x Page 787 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Hiroki Kuroda Scouting Report Is Apparently Brought To You By His Frustrated Wife
As seen last night on the YES Network. Although, after his two-hit, complete-game shutout of the Rangers, opponents are hitting just .215 against Kuroda at Yankee Stadium....

For The Second Time In Three Weeks, ESPN Plagiarizes A Reporter's Work
In late July, ESPN got a well-deserved tsk-tsking from the Internet after a SportsCenter anchor delivered "breaking news" about Dwight Howard that was lifted, nearly verbatim, from a RealGM.com report. "This stuff happens from time to time," Vince Doria, ESPN's senior vice president and director o...

A Lady You All Know And Love Examines An Alley Brawl Between Ladies Who Seemingly Hate One Another
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "GIRL FIGHT IN MARISSA ILL." Tonight's commentator: Emma Carmichael, former Deadspinner, current managing editor of Gawker....

Hey, Look, The Boston Red Sox Are Smearing Their Manager Again
The Red Sox stink. This we know. They are 57-59, fourth place, the whole thing. Why they stink is not quite as clear. Cody Ross and David Ortiz are the only position players who have hit especially well, and no one (save, uh, Scott Achison) has pitched well. Does anybody know where Dustin Pedroia an...

Adorable Canadian Child Sends Medal To DQ'd Relay Team, Accurately Describes Canada As "Cold"
Well isn't this fricking precious? Ten-year-old Elijah Porter was heartbroken when the Canadian 4x100 team appeared to take bronze, only to be disqualified for running outside the lane. So Elijah sent a letter to Justyn Warner, Gavin Smellie, Jared Connaughton, and Oluseyi Smith, and included his me...

The Circadian Advantage: How Sleep Patterns Benefit Certain NFL Teams
Imagine, for a second, that you are in a casino in Las Vegas. You have been in town for a few days, spent too much and slept too little, and recently found out the hard way that you are not as good at poker as you had thought. Now would be a good time to find a wager where the odds, like a tipsy bar...

Sippy Cups Can Go To Hell
I'm going to a wedding this weekend and I noticed that, as you grow older, you come full circle on weddings. The first time you go to a wedding in your 20s, you're like, "Oh cool, a wedding! FREE BOOZE AND SHIT!" But then everyone has that one summer where they have to go to eight weddings and by th...

Lax Bro Apologizes To Entire Southwest Flight For Acting Like A Lax Bro
Lax bros are one of the fastest-growing scourges to American society. They are members of a subculture that is composed entirely of privileged white kids with annoying names. Even worse, they are getting attention from the Boston Globe and stupid movies made about them....

How New York's New MLS Stadium Heralds The Return Of The Cosmos
Top-level soccer hasn't been played within New York's city limits since 1976, when the Cosmos packed up for Giants Stadium and took the country's brief love affair with domestic pro soccer with them. The drought might be close to over, as MLS and local politicians seem intent on returning a team to ...

Phoenix Mercury Practice With Mayor, Break His Nose
Greg Stanton became Phoenix's mayor last November in what was called the "nastiest" and "most contentious mayoral Phoenix has seen in nearly 30 years." As nasty as Stanton might be, he's no match for Nakia Sanford's flying elbows....

Asylum-Seeking Cameroon Boxers Say They Were Threatened
We told you last week about the seven Olympic athletes from Cameroon—five boxers, a swimmer, a soccer goalie—who went missing from the Olympic village in London. At the time, it was reported that those athletes would likely seek asylum. It now turns out that's exactly what the five boxers are doing,...

Felix Hernandez, The Big-Game Pitcher Who's Never Pitched In A Big Game
Since his first full season in 2006, Felix Hernandez has been one of baseball's best pitchers. He's accumulated 34.5 fWAR, which puts him behind only Justin Verlander, C.C. Sabathia, and Roy Halladay. You can also find Hernandez's name near the top of the list in most every other meaningful statisti...

Is This The Worst Play In The History Of Baseball? AJ Pierzynski Scores From First On A Groundout
In the bottom of the seventh of yesterday's game against Oakland, White Sox shortstop Alexei Ramirez hit a grounder to the left side of the infield. Third baseman Adam Rosales and shortstop Cliff Pennington both went for the ball. Meanwhile, White Sox catcher and notable asshole AJ Pierzynski took o...

The Time Has Come For America's Flight Attendants To Shut Up
I think we can all agree that the emcee-ization of America's flight attendants has grown steadily worse over the past decade. And today, reader Kurt has sent us (and Gawker) arguably the nadir of flight attendant pep talks. I must warn you in advance that these will be among the two most painfully a...

Netflix Appears To Have Been Acquired By ESPN, FOX Or MLB
Reader Aaron passed along this Netflix suggestion for those looking to sate their military documentary cravings. You've got your Revolutionary war fix, World War II and....what the? Yanks-Sox?...

New England Patriots To Work Out Plaxico Burress
Deadspin asks and Bob Kraft delivers. Maybe. After biting on Jerry Jones's double move earlier in the week, Plaxico is finally making his first team visit of the year and may end up with a rival to his two most recent organizations....

Russia Accuses Olympic Boxing Of Shadiness
At this point, boxing couldn't even beat its rap as a sham if it paid off every person who ever thought about boxing. Things are especially bad for your sport, though, when the Russians are accusing you of being below board. That's exactly what Russian sports minister, Vitaly Mutko has said about th...

Jamaica Set A New 4x100m Record With A Blistering 36.85 Seconds Around The Track
A Jamaican relay team anchored by Usain Bolt obliterated the world 4x100 record in running a 36.85 and holding off U.S. team that itself ran a world record-tying 37.04....

Teddy Atlas And Bob Papa Kicked Out Of Boxing Arena; NBC Doesn't Really Care Because No One From The U.S. Is In Contention
The International Amateur Boxing Association claimed that NBC’s announcers were “disturbing” the judges with their criticism and requested that organizers remove them from their ringside position. NBC was the only entity granted a ringside position and organizers politely suggested that maybe they t...

Marvin Lewis Called Rex Ryan To Beg Him Not To Use Tebow In The Wildcat
This little nugget comes buried in the fourth paragraph of a preseason game writeup....