x Page 814 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Jose Canseco Will Not Play In The Mexican League Because He Can't Pass A Drug Test
When he's not periodically melting down or being the huggiest person on Twitter, Jose Canseco still plays the occasional game of baseball. Last year he was player/coach of the independent Yuma Scorpions (a position not without its risks), and this year was to be a step up in the world: the Mexican L...
The Data Behind Yu Darvish's Brief But Devastating Debut
Texas Rangers hurler Yu Darvish made quite the spring training debut today against the San Diego Padres. (Of course, he cost the team more than $107 million, spent the last seven years pitching competitively in Japan, and these were the Padres, so you'd think he would do OK.) Still, thanks to some f...
The Guy From The Dropkick Murphys Would Like You To Know He Didn't Really Say Jonathan Papelbon Couldn't Use His Entrance Music
Yesterday, ESPN Music(?!) reported that Ken Casey, vocalist for the Dropkick Murphys, did not want Jonathan Papelbon using his old entrance song. That song, "I'm Shipping Up To Boston," is reserved for the Red Sox closer, Casey supposedly said, and now that Papelbon is in Philadelphia, he's no longe...
The "Scam Cup": How A Very American TV Event Gives U.S. Gymnasts A Leg Up On The Olympic Competition
If you listen to USA Gymnastics and NBC, it's one of the most important Olympic tune-ups. If you listen to the rest of the world, it's a glorified showcase for American athletes. So maybe it's fitting that the American Cup's highest-scoring female gymnast wasn't even entered in the competition. ...
So This Is What It Looks Like When Russian Prostitutes Fight In The Street
It is a sad day for all of humanity when трех проституток cannot resolve their grievances via non-violent means. As such, last week — or whenever this was filmed — cracked open a sad day for all of humanity....
42 "Pussy" Shots For £126! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Epic £203,948.80 Bar Tab From A Liverpool Nightclub
Where to begin with this epic bar tab (full version at the bottom)? It's so single-minded, so devoid of nuance. I hate it. When Petchesky first directed my attention to this abomination, which was posted a few places yesterday, I thought it could only belong to one man—Don Johnson, the "champagne ki...
The Dropkick Murphys Won't Let Jonathan Papelbon Use His Old Entrance Music (Update)
For the longest time (or at least since The Departed made it famous), Jonathan Papelbon has been entering to the bagpipes-and-guitars opening riff of the Dropkick Murphys' "I'm Shipping Up To Boston." It made sense. The song is instantly recognizable, catchy, and it's about Boston....
Wait, Chris Berman Gave How Much Money To Joe Lieberman?!
Your letters:...
Ronda Rousey Mangles Arms And Mean Mugs With The Best Of Them
If you only watched the main event of the Strikeforce event on Saturday, you would have seen judo Olympian Ronda Rousey turn Meisha Tate's arm into a bucatini noodle. But you might have missed Rousey scare the bejeezus out of Showtime host Heidi Androl before the fight. Look at that death stare. C...
Mike Tyson Has Finally Been Reduced To A (Possibly Naked) Vegas Lounge Act
I suppose this was inevitable. A great many infirm or destitute boxing champions wind up soft-shoeing in Las Vegas at some point. It is now Mike Tyson's turn. As reported elsewhere over the past few days, Tyson is getting ready to star in "Mike Tyson: Undisputed Truth—Live on Stage," a one-man one-w...
This Is Why Basketball Shorts Used To Have Belts
VCU's off to another fast start in tonight's CAA tournament championship game against Drexel, a team that's struggled to earn a reputation worthy of being included amongst Philadelphia's Big Five. But so far tonight, they look like they've been caught with their pants down—or at least the Dragons...
Red Sox Minor Leaguer Pete Ruiz Has His Own Tim Kurkjian Impression
It's more understated than Blue Jays catcher J.P. Arencibia's, we'll argue. Arencibia's is perhaps funnier—he brought Kurkjian's voice to a comically high pitch—but Ruiz's seems more precise. He's Darrell Hammond to Arencibia's Will Ferrell....
Inside The Spring Training Market For $4 Porn
Excerpted from former Padre and Blue Jay Dirk Hayhurst's splendid new book, Out of My League, a true chronicle of life as a pitcher bouncing between the minor leagues and the show. Some names have been changed....
Mercifully, Sean Payton's Movie About Xbox May Now Never Get Made
Back when Sean Payton was on top of the world, he decided he'd like to go Hollywood. So he typed up the bare bones of a script, and as we learned this morning, handed it over to convicted felon Mike Ornstein to shop around. Nothing seems to have come of the project, and with Ornstein heavily implica...
Ice Cube Ruins It For Everyone, Says There Was No One Particular "Good Day"
Back in January, we brought you two competing theories about the origins of Ice Cube's "It Was a Good Day." One intrepid blogger argued persuasively that Cube's good day was January 20, 1992. But another blogger debunked his case and brought in evidence from Behind the Music. He determined that Cu...
South Carolina High Schooler Follows Own Put-Back Dunk With Half-Court Alley-Oop Over Opponent
That first put-back dunk by Xavier Holmes of Great Falls (S.C.) was terrific enough. But second later Holmes caught a half-court pass from teammate Shaquille Simpson and proceeded to slam that, too. Holmes finished with 22 points, 20 rebounds, and five blocks as Great Falls won South Carolina's Cla...
Ronda Rousey Did Inhuman Things To Miesha Tate's Arm In Last Night's Strikeforce Title Bout
Ronda Rousey seized the Strikeforce bantamweight title last night with a gruesome win over Miesha Tate in Columbus that hurts just to watch....
Wladimir Klitschko Defended His World Heavyweight Title With A Brutal Beatdown Of Jean Marc Mormeck
Four-belt heavyweight title-holder Wladimir Klitchko demolished Jean Marc Mormeck at tonight's bout in Düsseldorf, putting the Frenchman out of his misery with a fourth-round knockout....
Trick Shot Enthusiasts Cut Down Tree To Use As A Slingshot, Make The Lorax Cry
I'm not really sure how you verify such a thing, but the dudes from Dude Perfect are claiming this is the world's largest slingshot. Once constructed, they successfully made a basket. After launching a few other items, a panda plants what appears to be a branch to replace the tree they cut down. I...
Great Moments In Group Sex Failure
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....