x Page 991 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Live Blog: Mexico vs. Angola
Since our attentions are usually more focused on the World Cup than, say, any other aspect of soccer, we always forget that Mexico is the United States' main rival; they kind of hate each other. How happy Mexico must be now, then, since they're just one win away from the Final 16, while the United S...

When Bat Boys Attack
If you were to believe television broadcasts, every fan who runs on the field is violently tackled, beaten or otherwise pummeled. Networks won't show a guy who's just running around, but they love to see him hammered. Hence, last night's Boston-Minnesota game, when a bat boy wallops a sliding fan an...

Ozzie's Rules
We know that in baseball, you're supposed to do what your manager tells you to do. Especially if you're a rookie. But what if your manager is about a half dozen different kinds of crazy and is named Ozzie Guillen? And what if the order is to go out and hit an opponent with a pitch? At what point d...

Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em
When we first saw this, we thought it was an Onion headline. But no, it's for real; Fifa Urges Mexico Coach To Try Nicotine Patch. Ha. Evidently FIFA is a bit miffed that Mexico coach Ricardo Lavolpe lit up a couple of Camels on the sideline during Mexico's 3-1 win over Iran in the World Cup. That's...

The Closer: Jose Contreras Will Rock Your World
Notes from a day in baseball:...

The Closer: Yankees; Dangerous When Wounded
Notes from a day in baseball:...

Accompanying The Heat And Tom Petty To The NBA Finals...
And your NBA Finals are set: It's old school vs. new school. It's a friendly, non-threatening German vs. The Diesel. It's a young, energetic, wide-smiling head coach vs. a crusty old man who hasn't smiled since 1983....

Taking Steps Towards Shaq...
A Dallas win tonight could set up a Finals matchup between two of the most media-friendly guys in the league: Shaquille O'Neal and Mark Cuban. I believe it would be the first appearance in the NBA Finals for any team that was owned by a man with his own blog....

Is It Good To Be Dirk Nowitzki?
We've figured out why Dallas Mavericks star Dirk Nowitzki, despite scoring 50 points in a Game 5 victory of massive import and generally making that leap into alpha dog status that we require of all our superstars, always fails to appropriately inspire us the way that, say, LeBron James, Dwyane Wade...

Phoenix, Dallas Rev 'Er Up Again
The two guys, in this Associated Press photo taken from Game 2 of the Dallas-Phoenix series, are, according to the caption, examples of how fans "are drawn to intense game situations because of their need for a competitive outlet and get rowdy at games because they want to feel involved, say exper...

Steve Nash's Monstrous Chest Hair. See It. Love It.
A site we'd never heard of — but was probably inevitable — called Drunk Athletes has typically just posted the warmed-over Ben Roethlisberger, Matt Leinart, Dirk Nowitzki drunk pictures we've all seen countless times. Must give them credit today, though, because they dredged one up that was new to u...

Suns Even It Up, Back To Dallas
It is good to see that the Phoenix Suns, in a moment of success and elation, are able to wordless express their emotion through its physical manifestation without fear of potential retribution or societal shame. It's a good thing....

In Support Of More Lego Violence
Inspired by this well-done ranking of the best five baseball fights — we agree that Nolan Ryan pounding Robin Ventura is No. 1, but Izzy Alcantara catcher-face-kick/take-on-all-comers minor league battle is one of the more underrated sports events of our lifetime — we are proud to showcase The Bat...

I'm Getting A Good Vibe From This World Cup...
Since we're already on a pretty good masturbation theme this week, I want to be sure that we don't leave out the ladies. If the video of Mike Cooper in a library wasn't quite doing it for them, the England soccer vibrator may do the job. The company's website makes some bold claims:...

More Hasselhoff On Your Friday Night Than You Probably Expected
The Mavericks found their groove against the Suns last night, winning 105-98, putting the series at 1-1 heading back to Phoenix. The three stars of the evening: Dirk Nowitzki, who had 30 points, 14 boards, and 6 assists. Josh Howard, who had 29 points and 7 boards. And David Hasselhoff, who is th...

You Know Schilling Plays Against Himself As Soon As The Game's Over
As you might have heard already, Red Sox legend/blowhard Curt Schilling loves video games so much that he had a video character of himself created for the game Everquest II. (Photo from Boston Dirt Dogs. If you defeat him, Sony donates money to the ALS foundation....

Steve Nash Politely Reminds You He's The MVP (In A Canadian Way)
Best thing we've read saw far today? True Hoop's headline "If He Keeps That Up, People Are Going To Start Thinking Steve Nash Is The MVP." Yeah, no kidding....