x Page 993 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

It'll Only Seem Like An Eternity
I know that you'll probably lose the deposit, but some of you Red Sox fans may want to ditch your previous choice for your eternal resting place and go with this, the Red Sox Casket offered at Rockland Funeral Home. Spend eternity in the loving embrace of the Sox, which is more than Manny ever did. ...

"Wonderful Boyfriend" Makes Up Other Half Of Iowa Bathroom Sex Team
A thought occurred to me this weekend—we all know the face and identity of the the um ... "unfortunate" woman who got it on with a complete stranger in a Metrodome bathroom while her husband sat in the seats not wondering what was taking so long. (It helps that she's now given two interviews to loca...

College Football Roundup: Every Game Counts...Except When They Don't and Texas Gets Messed With
Oklahoma beat Oklahoma State late Saturday night 61-41. This score was enough to vault the Sooners ahead of Texas in the BCS Standings and, as a result, send them into the Big 12 Title Game against Missouri courtesy of the fifth tiebreak. (The sixth tiebreak was, in a nice nod to BCS totalitariianis...

Plaxico Burress Takes The Perp Walk
A loyal Deadspin reader who we will call "Ray," waited out the 17th Precinct in Midtown Manhattan today to catch one of the most time-honored traditions in sports—the athlete perp walk. Citizen journalism!...

Plaxico Burress Update: He Still Has A Hole In His Leg
Do you remember a couple of years ago when Dick Cheney shot that guy and the basic facts of story were so utterly ridiculous that all you had to do was say "The Vice President of the United States shot a man in the face" and that counted as both a joke and a serious analysis of the situation? That's...

Is This A Trick Question?
Thanks to reader Pete for the ESPN screen cap - you just made Rick Chandler's day. Yes, it's been quite a weekend for Plaxico Burress. A lot has happened since that fateful moment outside the Latin Quarter on late Friday night, when he told teammate Antonio Pierce, "Lemme meet you inside. I just hav...

The Punisher and The Nightmare Electrify Ontario
The brand new Citizens Bank Arena in Ontario, California played host to an HBO Boxing After Dark card highlighted by Paul "The Punisher" Williams and Chris "The Nightmare" Arreola, with both men recording rather dramatic knockout victories. Arreola, the overweight heavyweight knockout machine, rema...

Your Plaxico Burress Self-Inflicted Gunshot Wound Update
So a few more details seem to be emerging about the bizarre "Plaxico shot himself at a club" story. The New York Post is now reporting that the incident took place just after midnight on Friday at a club called Latin Quarter in Manhattan, while Plax was out on the town with teammate Antonio Pierce. ...

Plaxico Burress Accidentally Shoots Self in Leg
Yep, you read that right. Jay Glazer is reporting that sometime last night, Burress fired a gun into his own leg and spent the night in hospital, but that the injuries are non life-threatening. More, obviously, as more becomes available. UPDATE: Apparently John Clayton is reporting the incident too...


Train Wreck of a Woman Who Had Hawkeye Sex in Bathroom Stall Comes Clean
We featured this as a quicklink, but given the amount of attention this poor woman is getting due to her unfortunate drunken sexcapades at the Iowa/Minnesota game last week, it's probably worth another look....

After Abilene Christian's 93-Point Saturday Afternoon, Fans Ask What's Next?
Stuff you may not know about Div. 1-AA II Abilene Christian University: Their quarterback, Billy Don Madison Malone, was once the heir apparent to J.P. Losman at Tulane, and some says he's better. Wilbert Montgomery, who still holds the franchise rushing record for the Philadelphia Eagles, is a prou...

Mayweather Jr. Makes It Rain With Monopoly Money, Loses Street Cred
Now that Pacman Jones has vowed to straighten up and fly right, who's going to toss enormous amounts of cash into the air so that random strangers can clutch at the loot in a screaming frenzy? Floyd Mayweather Jr., that's who. One glitch, however. Apparently Pretty Boy Floyd's money is fake. As in c...

Obama Knows How To Keep His Chicago Press Corp Happy
Well, President elect Barack Obama continues to show the world that his sports fandom was not an act to just to get on SportsCenter. At yesterday's briefing, reporters were separated into Sox and Cubs sections. In today's briefing, a reporter was singled out for an apology as he, a devoted Sox fan, ...

A-Rod Not In Touch With His Inner Jewishness
Uh oh, guess who was busted for skipping his Kaballah classes? One Mr. Alex Rodriguez is in so much deep shit with Madonna it's not even funny. MSNBC is saying that the Yankee has cancelled private classes with "spiritual leader" Eitan Yardeni, who was supposed to guide A-Rod around the bases of cos...

The Inevitable Showdown Between Women's MMA And Adult Entertainment
In my old job, it was sort of an unwritten rule that moment you or your work enters the zeitgeist, it takes about 5.3 seconds for a porn company to make a movie about it. So fans of female mixed martial arts should be very pleased to know that their favorite sport is now the setting for a hardcore l...

Have Sex The Fundamentalist Way, Minus The Robes
The most fascinating story I read all week, without question, was this New York Times story about Rev. Ed Young in Grapevine, Tx. encouraging his parishioners to have sex with each other. Life's gotta be pretty dull for a preacher sometimes — "Lord, forgive me, but if I have to give another endless ...

Ted Williams' Daughter Likes To Paint, Has Issues
According to Leigh Montville’s book “Ted Williams: The Biography of an American Hero,” Williams was a distant father, who missed the births of son John Henry and daughter Claudia, the former for a fishing trip. His non-parenting of course caused no repercussions, as is seen in adult Claudia's happy,...

College Football Roundup: At Least You Don't Live In Michigan Edition
Yesterday I landed in Detroit for Thanksgiving. Our first stop upon arriving was an Italian restaurant where my wife's grandmother was celebrating her 80th birthday. I'm standing at the bar watching the the Titans-Jets game on the television and occasionally a sports fan from Michigan wonders by to...

Hatton and Kirkland Win With Ease
Ricky Hatton debuted a more refined style in his first fight under Floyd Mayweather Sr. and he delivered in a big way, becoming the first fighter to stop Paul Maligniaggi as a professional. The Magic Man is still arguing that the fight should not have been stopped in the eleventh round, but that's j...