yes Page 52 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Argentine Outlaws Clash With Malodorous Nuts: UC Santa Barbara-Ohio State Open Thread
Can Orlando Johnson do an Evan Turner Impression and bounce the Buckeyes? Not if Thad's boys can help it. (Expect them to help it.) Michigan fans: say how much OSU sucks. OSU fans: hang out and continue ignoring Michigan fans....

Let Us Now Savor The Bitter Tears Of Michigan Fans
Current thread titles at MGoBlog's message board: "God Hates Us," "Michigan Hating God," and "At what point do I poke myself in the eye with a stick," which is about the football team. [MGoBlog, h/t BML]...

Evan Turner Shuts Up Steve Lavin With 40-Foot Buzzer Beater
Things were looking good for the Michigan basketball team. Up two, two seconds left in the game; it was in the bag. Steve Lavin said it was the perfect example of why the conference tournaments are so great....

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor
Ladies and germs, I give you Jerry Thornton of WEEI....

Telestrator Dong: Elephantiasis Edition
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Today In Hilarious Baseball Stat Acronym Humor
Ron Borges, ladies and germs, on UZR: "I thought those were the initials of a former Russian state only to learn it means Ultimate Zone Rating." [Boston Herald]...

Chirpy Korean Girl Group Likes Glitter, Knee-Highs, Iowa Hawkeyes Football
Via the good lads at Black Heart Gold Pants comes this music video for which I have no words, other than to say that it is no more inexplicable than the last time women in Korea fawned over a Hawkeye....

Open Thread: Ohio State-WVU, Kansas-Iowa State, Marquette-'Cuse, Longwood-Savannah State, Etc.
Possible topics for discussion: Evan Turner's 19-10-6 line, whether Andy Katz's prose reads like a Swedish-to-English Babelfish translation, Tyshawn Taylor's Facebook profile, the shock of learning that Lawrence Moten is the Big East's all-time leading scorer, the Morrill Land-Grant Acts....

Tebow The Cat Survives Miraculous Journey, Won't Shut Up About It
A Hawkeye fan on the way back from the Orange Bowl finds a stray cat stowed away underneath his pickup truck. "We named her Tebow, because she's a crier." [Cedar Rapids Gazette]...

Last Night's Winner: Birds
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like our fine feathered friends (real and symbolic) that will get paid lots of money to play baseball and also not be murdered by them....

The Return Of The Hi-Top Fade
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

A-HOLE COACH DIGEST: The One Where Lester Hayes Ruins A 12-Year-Old
Welcome to Asshole Coach Digest, where we regale you Deadspin folk with stories of the meanest, cruelest, most batshit insane coaches you ever had. Email me your asshole coach story here....

The One Where We Find Out Why This Man Is Having Sex With A Car
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW and NOT SAFE FOR CHRISTMAS.)...

Brian Kelly Will Coach The Fighting Irish, According To Writing Irish
In the most Irish piece of breaking news ever, a man named Sean O'Shea at something called IrishCentral.com is reporting that Cincinnati's Brian Kelly will indeed be the new coach of Notre Dame. [IrishCentral.com]...

OSU Students Wallow In Their Own Urine
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Why Pirates Fans Are The Luckiest Fans In The World
A new study of sports fan psychology concludes that fans who have the most negative emotions toward their team's prospects, get the most enjoyment out of games. So treasure your angst ... because it's more fun that way....

Tony Romo Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Tony Romo, who won the weekend by not making a complete spectacle of himself. When no one notices you, you're probably doing your job right....

Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....