yo Page 279 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Someone Explain To Me The Alien Alloys Before I Fucking Explode
Hello, hi, yes, hello. We’ve all seen this, right? This story in the New York Fucking Times about the Pentagon’s $22 million Oh Shit There Might Be Aliens program? We’ve all read it? We’ve all engaged with the evidence within the story, written in part by two journalists who have won Pulitzer Prizes...
Michael Beasley Is Just Cruel
The Oklahoma City Thunder narrowly topped the Philadelphia 76ers in an insane triple-overtime slugfest Friday night. You can imagine, they were therefore not at their most energetic Saturday night, playing the second leg of a back-to-back, in New York. Still, the Knicks, without Kristaps Porzingis, ...
CC Sabathia Returning To Yankees To Complete "Unfinished Business"
C.C. Sabathia’s free agency presumably got a lot simpler after the Yankees, who came achingly close to advancing to the World Series back in October, went out and snagged the reigning National League MVP. To absolutely no one’s great surprise, Sabathia would prefer to spend his age-38 season getting...
Former Yankees Prospect Dustin Fowler Suing White Sox Over Injured Knee
Dustin Fowler made his MLB debut for the Yankees on June 29 of this year, at the Chicago White Sox. In the bottom of the first inning, Fowler tracked a fly ball into foul territory in shallow right field and crashed hard into the wall, injuring his right knee in the process and ending his season....
Jets Offensive Coordinator Admits He Gave Up Against Broncos
Okay, so the Jets’ offense didn’t turn out to be historically awful this season, as I said it had a chance to be. Shoot me. Hell, the Jets even have five wins, which is ... something, I guess. But it still took a grand total of 13 games for their offensive coordinator to cop to saying, Fuck it, let’...
Kristaps Porzingis Is Hurt, But He's Smart
Kristaps Porzingis removed himself from last night’s 111-104 win over the Nets after a non-contact injury to his left knee. He tweaked it once in the first half and then left the game in the third quarter after re-aggravating it on this play. ...
Please Do Check Out The Spicy Drama Going Down At The International Society For The History Of The Map
I’ve found, personally, an inverse correlation between how interesting an institutional power squabble is and how significant the institution in question is. A power squabble at the highest levels of a large national government, for example, is not really interesting; it will very often be terrifyin...
Jeremy Kerley Says A Ghost May Have Tainted His Pee
Jets receiver Jeremy Kerley is back at practice after serving a four-game suspension for a positive PED test. At the time of his ban, Kerley said he was “shocked,” as he had never knowingly taken steroids....
Michael Beasley Was The Space Oddity The Knicks Needed
Tuesday’s game between the Knicks and Lakers was pretty fun to watch, but it was also a reminder that New York is gradually staggering out of the Basketball Dark Ages, its path forward lit by the bright French teen Frank Ntilikina and the divine rays emanating from The Long Son of God....
The Lakers And Knicks Went Nuts For Two Minutes
Madison Square Garden looks like an extremely fun place to be tonight, as two teams filled with intriguing young talents keep going back and forth with each other through three quarters. The game’s excitement peaked (so far) with this pulse-pounding two minutes of basketball, which kicked off with a...
Michael Beasley Fouled Out In 10 Minutes And Knicks Fans Loved It
Michael Beasley, a man who still plays in the NBA, managed to commit six fouls in 10 minutes of playing time in the Knicks’ 111-107 win over the Hawks on Sunday. ...
Reports: Giancarlo Stanton Will Be Traded To The Friggin' Yankees
Giancarlo Stanton, heretofore an easily likable dong-mashing baseball hero, will complete a dramatic heel turn and join the disgusting New York Yankees, according to multiple reports. ...
Nick Young Finds The Outer Limit Of The Pump Fake
Nick Young’s shooting form is just a bit outside the realm of what most would dub conventional, to say nothing of the times and places that he chooses to take his shots. He has a high release point, though he attains that altitude by jerking his body over to the left and casting the ball out relativ...
Put Away Your Pitchforks, Eli Manning Is Starting Again
The outrage that followed now-fired Giants coach Ben McAdoo’s benching of Eli Manning was mountainous and seemingly never-ending. Everyone had something to say about how badly the Giants fucked up, with an outpouring of support perhaps unprecedented for a player of Manning’s decidedly average talent...
Crazy Russian Lady Slaps Carles Puyol In Face With Big Ol' Dildo
Retired Barcelona legend Carles Puyol expected to fiddle around with an assortment of (plastic) balls when he participated in last week’s World Cup group draw in host country Russia. But what he could not have expected was being accosted by a lady telling him “I want to fuck you, I have so big dick,...
Beyoncé Makes Surprise Appearance To Present Colin Kaepernick With <i>Sports Illustrated</i> Award
Beyoncé showed up at tonight’s Sports Illustrated Sportsman of the Year Ceremony to present Colin Kaepernick with the Muhammad Ali Legacy Award, given annually to an athlete who uses sports as a platform to change the world....
I Can Really Identify With These Dads Who Like Swords
Thanks to Brendan Karet and Dave Weigel, the Deadspin staff has spent the last half hour or so watching this video of a husky man in business casual wailing away on some meat, and then following the Youtube rabbit hole down to, uh, more videos of What If Game Of Thrones But Middle Management?...
The College Football Playoff Is Designed To Be Loathed
Your letters: ...
An Early Guide To The New York Giants' Head Coaching Search
On Monday, the New York Giants relieved head coach Ben McAdoo of his McAduties. It was somehow both a long time coming and abrupt—over a little under two seasons as the team’s coach, McAdoo first positioned himself as something like a rising star and then instantly and dramatically biffed everything...
![Even Bill Belichick Knew Gronk's Late Hit Was "Bullshit" [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/lla3rdkixo8utuyefjtl.jpg)
Even Bill Belichick Knew Gronk's Late Hit Was "Bullshit" [Update]
Rob Gronkowski, a palooka with a new mean streak, somehow avoided an ejection after he crushed Bills cornerback Tre’Davious White well after the play was over. (White had to leave the game and be evaluated for a concussion.) ...