yo Page 534 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Already Basically Fired Derek Dooley Now Completely Fired From The University Of Tennessee
Derek Dooley—already pretty much done at Tennessee—is now officially done at Tennessee. Here's Volquest:...

The University Of Maryland's Twitter Account Was Hacked, Kept It Pretty Real For About Twenty Minutes
Along with Rutgers, the University of Maryland looks likely to flee its current conference for the Big Ten, and some people—notably, the person who hacked Maryland's official Twitter account tonight—are pretty happy about it. At first it seems conceivable that the person who manages UM's social med...

Beer Of The Week: Stella Artois, Belgium's Allegedly French Beer
Apparently Stella Artois used to be advertised in the U.K. under the slogan "reassuringly expensive." Without knowing the relative merits of price and quality across the pond, I can only rejoice that such a snotty tagline has gone the way of doctors prescribing cigarettes. There is nothing reassurin...

The Mismanaged, Crazy Jets Might Be Keeping Tebow On The Bench Because They Can't Afford The Incentives In His Contract
One of the great things about the Jets this year—the only great thing, perhaps—is that by dealing for Tim Tebow, emphasizing the extent to which they'd use him (they said it would 25% of snaps), and not using him nearly that much (it was 10.1% before week ten and inched slightly higher after), they'...

The Ballad Of The Other J.R. Smith, Web Designer And Recipient Of Much Of The Praise And Scorn Meant For The Knicks' J.R. Smith
Via Trey Kerby, the above mournful tweet, from J.R. Smith, the web designer (and, as his Twitter bio puts it, "NOT A BASKETBALL PLAYER"). If you're wondering how the other J.R. Smith can tell basketball season has started up, well, social media really has a way of putting people in touch with their ...

This Week's Signs Of The Apocalypse
For nearly two decades, Sports Illustrated has stirred the tea leaves to discern a weekly Sign of the Apocalypse. Deadspin salutes the magazine's ongoing effort to cover the end of times but declines to cede the scoop on the biggest event in world history....

University Of Florida Marketing Dept. Outlaws The Acrobatic Parts Of Cheerleading In Response To An Orlando Magic Cheerleader Injury, UF Cheerleaders Righteously Pissed
On Tuesday, Jamie Woode, a member of the Orlando Magic cheerleading squad and "stunt team"—that's where they throw you around—fell during a between-quarter routine and landed on her head and neck, fracturing three vertebrae and breaking a rib. It was scary and uncomfortable to see her on the groun...

"I'm 38 Years Old, Baby": Things Rasheed Wallace Said, Did, And Pointed At During Last Night's Knicks Game
Rasheed Wallace: lover, fighter, hilarious training camp invitee, and talker of the best trash in the NBA. On Tuesday, he yelled "Yeah, Aflac!" at Aaron Afflalo after Afflalo bricked a free throw; last night, he yelled everything at everybody after they did anything. Here is your courtside Sheed exp...

Your Week 12 College Football Master Schedule
Schedule and broadcasters via and cross-referenced with. If you spot any errors, let us know below. Conferences reflect home teams. Ranked teams bold; rankings from the USA Today Coaches Poll. Times (EST)....

Don't Worry, Rest Of College Football, Alabama's Only Getting The Leading High School Rusher Of All Time Next Year
It's been a good week for college football teams not named "Alabama" because they've been able to bask in the notion, however mistaken, that the gap Alabama between themselves and Alabama is closing. A loss to Texas A&M dropped the Crimson Tide to a previously unthinkable 9-1, and now the team finds...

Someone Is Shopping A Video Of Rasheed Wallace (Maybe) Fighting Some Dude In A White Plains Parking Lot
And we know this because we got an email about it from a tipster at 11:17 this morning:...

The Weirdest And Worst Ballots Of MLB Awards Voting
Just because voting is subjective does not mean voters can't be wrong. So, with the knowledge that no ballot will make everyone happy, and with sincere appreciation for the BBWAA making all ballots public, let's hand out some awards to the most mystifying, inexplicable, and just downright terrible M...

Tony Parker Crossover Leaves Raymond Felton Confused
In fairness to Felton, it looks like he was anticipating the screen from Tim Duncan, and that he was trying to avoid it. Felton eventually figured out where Parker was going about an hour later, but the Knicks still won. They're now 6-and-fucking-0....

What Can NFL Player Polls Teach Us About What NFL Players Think Other People Think?
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Anonymous Jets Source Believes Anonymous Jets Sources Were Made Up
This year's edition of the Jets' public meltdown began in earnest this week as the Daily News ran a series of anonymous quotes from the locker room blasting Tim Tebow's gimmickry and poor quarterbacking. (You could just have easily framed the same quotes as a positive story, about how the locker roo...

Why Do We Let Kids Play Tackle Football?
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Mark Sanchez And The Jets Are Wearing Team Shirts That Say "We Will Persist"
The New York Jets have had a rough few days. Killed on the road in Seattle, killed by the media, and now killed—if you consider dismissing the throwing abilities of a backup quarterback who can't pass "killing"—by an anonymous member of their own defense. But do the Jets despair? Hell no. They made ...

Brandon Marshall Took A Picture In Front Of A Big Naked Bear Ass
When Brandon Marshall arrived at the stadium this morning, he was excited to find a package from the University of Central Florida (his alma mater) waiting for him....

Here's Rasheed Wallace Yelling "Yeah, AFLAC!" After A Missed Free Throw
After being out of the league for two years, you can't blame Rasheed Wallace if he's trying to force someone's hand on snapping up an endorsement contract. His surprising resurrection has been an unexpected bright spot this season for the (as of now) 4-0 Knickerbockers. Frankly, of all the things ...

Robinson Cano Is Now An American Citizen
Cano, who split his childhood between baseball hotbed San Pedro de Macorís and Newark, N.J., made it official today, getting sworn in as a naturalized U.S. citizen. As is customary for all new Americans, Cano received his certificate, flag, and David Ortiz beard....