yo Page 753 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you settle down for a long winter's nap ... • NFL: Denver at San Diego. (8 p.m.) Shanahan looks as close to an elf as you're gonna get. [ESPN] • Movie: How The Grinch Stole Christmas (8 p.m.) They say that Belichick's heart grew three sizes that day. [ABC] • Movie: The Godfather (9 ...

Look, Ugly Yankees Merchandise
So, you're about nine hours from Christmas, and you still haven't bought anything. You're screwed, pretty much. Shame, too; if you had thought ahead, you could have had some hideous New York Yankees gear....

Today's Episode: Isiah Has An Epiphany
Skeets is off celebrating Christmas Eve the way that all Canadians do; pantsless and migrating with a herd of elk. So your NBA Closer today is being written by United States Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Alphonso Jackson. Do enjoy....

Brigham Da Noise, Brigham Da Funk
We've been fortunate so far that most of the bowl games have given us actual watchable football. Sure, while many of the games are devoid of tradition ("New Mexico! It's ... culture!") but so what? The way the bowl system is set up, fans normally bludgeoned with story after story of Tim Tebow and Le...

About Last Night...
What you missed while publicly executing Santa Claus... • NFL: Matt Moore was disrupted by printouts of ... your mom. Cowboys escape Carolina with a 20-13 win. • NCAA Football: Best two out of three then? BYU avenges regular season loss to UCLA in the Las Vegas Bowl. • NCAA Basketball: Oregon loses ...

Let's Take Off This Mask And See Who You REALLY Are
Congratulations to photographer Chris Detrick, who offers up a strong 11th hour entry into Most Disturbing Sports Photo Of The Year. The guy getting his eyes plucked out is BYU's Jonathan Tavernari. The poker is Jason Walberg. Oddly enough, there was no foul on this play, and Tavernari seems to have...

About Last Night...
What you missed while explaining the jerkoff motion to your co-workers... • NCAA Football: SCHNELL! SCHNELL! Florida Atlantic quickly builds a football program and wins a bowl game. • NHL: Pssh. Ancient Chinese secret. Calgary falls to Dallas in overtime. • NBA: Portland's win streak is at 10, they'...

Dan Shanoff's Yearly Christmas Tome
Continuing a Christmas tradition on Deadspin (and, before that, other fine holiday establishments), Dan Shanoff presents a special holiday poem, dedicated to the many reindeer who pull the Deadspin sleigh — usually drunk, stoned or otherwise on crack. Happy holidays!...

About Last Night
What you missed while preparing for the Global Orgasm For Peace ... • NFL: Willie Parker will be able to use the handicapped parking space at Steelers practice all next week. Pittsburgh 41, St. Louis 24. • College football: Navy and Utah pound each other like the Monitor and the Merrimack until one ...

Michael Vick Does Not Approve
We haven't quite wrapped our minds around this alleged news that Jonathan Papelbon's dog at the clinching ball from the World Series last year. We're not sure we believe it....

Knicks End Up Not Being Worth Protesting
So the Knicks fans had that "Fire Isiah" rally yesterday afternoon — inconveniently right before the Knicks' most impressive win of the season — and the outrage in New York was palpable. And by "palpable," we mean, "about two dozen people showed up despite it taking place in one of the most highly f...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as clowns surround your house and lob in water balloons ... • College basketball: Memphis at Cincinnati, 7 p.m. (ET). My bearcat and I will be right in front of the TV. [ESPN2] • NBA: Detroit at Boston, 7 p.m. (ET); Phoenix at Dallas, 9:30 p.m. (ET). Your NBA Playoff semifinalists? Pos...


Roger Clemens' Uphill Battle
We really haven't learned anything new about Roger Clemens this week. We might have some specifics about what everyone's been whispering about for years, but it's no shocker. And we also were reminded that Roger Clemens, more than anything else, chokes in the clutch....

The New York Knicks Will Not Tolerate Your Taunts
If you're a major sports franchise that's trying to survive rough times, you do anything you can to keep the fans on your side ... winning hearts and minds is almost as important as winning games. So that's why, naturally, the New York Knicks on Monday ejected a fan for holding up a "Fire Isiah' sig...

Bob Knight, Isiah Thomas And "Sunt"
An outstanding find from The Big Lead: An old video of Isiah Thomas, while honoring former coach Bobby Knight, explaining what he learned from the coach. The main thing he learned? The word "sunt."...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch as you listen to Travis Barker "Superman dat drum kit" ... • College Basketball: Memphis vs. Middle Tennessee State. Make Rep. Bart Gordon proud, MTSU. [ESPN2] • World Extreme Cagefighting: Crunkilton vs. McCullough. Please don't feed the animals. [VS.] • Movie: The Notebook. "I love t...

Eric Mangini's 115th Dream
Eric Mangini is not inherently a likable character. He's schlubby, he's obsessive and he always looks exhausted. He was on "The Sopranos;" that's about all we can come up with, positively. But everyone will be rooting for him Sunday....

Last Chance To Buy Outdated T-Shirt
Anyone who has been annoyed — read: us — by the odd advertisements for Gawker Media T-shirts over the last month is in luck: The Gawker Shop is closing down, and you won't be bothered again. This also means this is your last chance to buy that "You're With Me, Leather" T-shirt before it vanishes for...

Knicks Keep On Falling ...
The NBA Closer is written by our own Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or trying to find Schenectady, NY on a map, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast. Enjoy!...