Sports News Without Access, Favor, Or Discretion

On Friday we told the inspiring story of former UCLA marching band member Brian Suksomwong, whose name single-handedly chased away the dark clouds of the Mitchell Report to bring us the sweet, warm sunshine of laughter. Then, as Skeets pointed out over the weekend, Bruins Nation took exception to the post. But far from being outraged themselves, Bruins Nation readers decided to play along. The results were fairly amusing.

So Deadspin picks up on a "story" of an Asian-American Bruin band member named Brian Suksomwong. Evidently this is the funniest name of all time. Well, its not that funny, in my humble opinion. I think the folks at deadspin need to get a life. We all know sc fans will pick up on this.


• "A good friend of mine knew a nice couple — Harry and Rosie Tush. He swears that's true. I don't know if they were Bruins." — Fox 71

• "Here's another one: Phuoc Hu. (Vietnamese I think). I also knew a Harry Cox." — Godblessyyus95

• "I had a root canal done by a Dr Fang in Tustin, California." — whp68

• "If anyone remembers ... the 2003-2004 bball season and the long-haired band member that would wildly jump up and down in front of the opposing team's charity stripe attempt, that was Brian." — bhmt


• "LEAVE SUKSOMWONG ALONE! How f*cking dare anyone out there make fun of Suksomwong after all he has been through.! (sobbing) He graduated, he changed his name! He had two f*cking trumpets! All you people care about is..... readers and making money off of him. HE'S A HUMAN! (sobbing) What you don't realize is that Suksomwong is making you all this money and all you do is write a bunch of crap about him. He hasn't performed on the field in years. He should play "Gimme More" for a reason because all you people want is MORE! MORE-MORE, MORE: MORE!. (sobbing) LEAVE HIM ALONE! You are lucky he even performed for you BASTARDS! LEEEAVE SUKSOMWONG ALLLLLONE!.....Please. (sobbing) Leave Suksomwong Alone Please.... ! (sobbing) Leave Suksomwong alone! Right now! I mean it.! Anyone that has a problem with him you deal with me, because he is not well right now. (sobbing) Leave him alone! (sobbing)" — WhatWouldKornheiserDo

• "Speaking of unfortunate names, though, has anyone else ever seen the sign that hung in the University Research Library commemorating Mr. Hugh G. Dick? I think they might have since taken the sign down, but it was definitely up (albeit hidden) the whole time I was at school." — London


Bruins Nation is right, of course; we should be above making sport of people's names. It won't happen again. Except for this. Dang it! Sorry.

Could This Be, At Long Last, The World's Funniest Name? [Deadspin]
Really Funny ... Not [Bruins Nation]

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