A self-serious, chiding, in all likelihood jealous quartet of talking heads went on Canadian TV yesterday and, in discussing what they characterized as the “disgraceful” way the USWNT went about trouncing Thailand in the Women’s World Cup, proceeded to hump the notion of sportsmanship to within an inch of its life:

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“I think, as a Canadian, we would just never ever think about doing something like that,” said former Canada national teamer Kaylyn Kyle about the USWNT’s (admittedly unnecessary but certainly not “disgraceful”) goal celebrations in the latter stages of the match. Considering Canada haven’t scored 13 goals in their last three World Cups combined, and have only ever made it out of the group stage at this tournament twice, it’s no surprise Kyle and her compatriots have never thought about how they might react were they capable of that sort of thing on the game’s biggest stage.

Should Canada meet the U.S. somewhere in the knockout rounds in France this summer, I hope for the sake of these Canadians’ delicate sensibilities that the Americans take it a little easier on the celebrations during what would probably be another easy victory.