Tom Coughlin Shuffles Off

After what feels like 57 years of being on the hot seat, Tom Coughlin, a man who perfectly embodied the word “coot,” is leaving the New York Giants. Officially, Coughlin has decided to step down, through a statement released by the team:

I met with John Mara and Steve Tisch this afternoon, and I informed them that it is in the best interest of the organization that I step down as head coach. I strongly believe the time is right for me and my family, and as I said, the Giants organization.

It has been an honor and a privilege to serve as head coach of the New York Football Giants. This is a not a sad occasion for me. I have spent 15 years with this organization as an assistant and head coach and was fortunate to be part of three Super Bowl winning teams. A Lombardi Trophy every five years is an achievement in which we all take great pride.

Obviously, the past three years have not been what any of us expect, and as head coach, I accept the responsibility for those seasons.

I think it has been evident these last 12 years here how much pride I take in representing this franchise. I am gratified and proud that we were able to deliver two more Lombardi trophies to the display case in our lobby during that time. That is a tribute to our players and staff, and it was truly fulfilling to be the leader of those teams.

Eli Manning was broken up to see the departure of the only NFL head coach he’s ever had:

Coughlin hasn’t mentioned retirement—he’s still spry, at 69 years old—so he might stick around for an opening at another team. While that process plays out, let’s remember the fond memories. Who can forget the time rookie punter Matt Dodge messed up, and Coughlin yelled at him in the middle of the field?

How about that time Coughlin was in a fight with Siri?

Two weeks ago I’m trying to get to a roller hockey game that my grandson is playing in, so Marc Ross [the Giants’ director of college scouting] had showed me how to talk to this phone,” Coughlin said. “I don’t trust the lady in GPS, I don’t trust her, because they don’t send you the right way. I hit the button and I go ‘Park Ridge, New Jersey.’ And she comes back on, she’s giving me directions. So now I figure out where I am. I hit the thing and I said, ‘Thank you very much, I know exactly where I am now.’ And she comes back and says, ‘You don’t have to thank me.’ I swear to God that’s what she said. And then I couldn’t get her to shut up. Every turn. ‘Take a right here.’ I know where I am. I know where I am. I’m a block away from my house and she’s telling me where to go. I said, ‘I know where I’m going.’

What about all those shots of Coughlin, cheeks alarmingly red, acting like an incensed grandpa on the sidelines? Here’s a favorite:

How about the time he was so mad that he just threw his dang playsheet in disgust? Before checking the box score, I’m going to assume this was a reaction to an Eli Manning pick:

Yeah, that’s what happened. Coughlin can find relief in never having to worry about another Eli interception again.

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