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Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Vlad Guerrero Jr.'s Righteous Dong Sent The Yankees To Hell Where They Belong

Illustration for article titled Vlad Guerrero Jr.s Righteous Dong Sent The Yankees To Hell Where They Belong
Photo: Tom Szczerbowski (Getty)

The vile and hideous New York Yankees were, inexplicably, somehow on the verge of maybe winning a game on Wednesday night, until a legend in the making shut them down. The Yanks have rightfully tasted victory only once in the month of June, and to prevent that disaster from happening again, the Toronto Blue Jays enlisted the services of avenging angel Vlad Guerrero Jr. and his mighty baseball bat.


With the Jays down 7-6 in the bottom of the eighth, but with two runners on base, Guerrero stepped up to the plate against Zack Britton. After taking a ball and fouling off a pitch he must have known wasn’t the one, Toronto’s savior blasted a low sinker all the way to deep center for the game-winning dong, covering the Yankees in eternal shame for daring to try and pitch to him.


(Beyond its mightiness, the dinger was impressive for marking the only time a below-the-zone Britton sinker has been sent out of the yard.)

Emboldened by his heroics, the Blue Jays would hit two more dingers in the inning, and eventually, they’d win 11-7. We’ll see if the Yankees even show up for their series capper against Toronto on Thursday night, or if they’ve already fled the country out of embarrassment.

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