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Sports News Without Fear, Favor or Compromise

Well, Shoot, Then Just Let Tubby Toss It

Illustration for article titled Well, Shoot, Then Just Let Tubby Toss It

Giants dead man walking Tom Coughlin hasn't announced a starter for Sunday's game against the Packers yet, but it seems pretty likely, in the wake of Eli Manning's partially separated shoulder, that Jared Lorenzen is gonna take snaps for the NYG next week. (At least, Chris Mortensen says so, and he's always right!) In this, we are all blessed.

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First off, we'd like to note that Lorenzen actually has outlasted the career of the man he took over for as Kentucky quarterback Tim Couch, which is probably because it's pretty clear he's never taken steroids. Lorenzen wasn't drafted at all, but here he is, battling Brett Favre as a Giants season threatens to careen wildly off the rails. We can't think of many storylines we'd enjoy more than Lorenzen inspiring the Giants to go on a run. What better metaphor for the Eli Manning Experience that he would lose his job to a guy who weighs 300 pounds. And hey: He still scrambles better than Leinart.

Giants To Start Offensive Lineman At QB [A Pudge Is A Sandwich]

(UPDATE: Ha! He's Cartman!)

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